Clear Skies
by KrisEleven
Summary: Willing to try anything to be normal, Tris hides her powers and her name to go to Lightsbridge. But of course the life she's chosen is not without its own perils... Will she be able to survive when her new life demands she give up everything she once was?
1. Headaches

A/N: Edited 01/16/10. Clear Skies recieved second place in the Winter 2008/2009 Ficship Competitions!

For my Betas:

Etariel- Thank you for giving me the plotbunnies I needed to keep the second edit interesting. I really appreciate you taking the time to reread the first edit and I hope this has some of your vision for the improvements.

LunaSphere- Endless reading and editing over months and months, while I'm sure you had more important things to do. Thank you so much for taking the time. This wouldn't be the same story without your help.

Katiebug- Thanks for all your help. I appreciate everything you've done for me on this. You have helped both edits get written.

Sweet Sassy Sarah- For staying up until the wee hours of the morning and listening to me whine. And for giving my confidence a boost, of course. X) Thank you for being my sounding board and for being so enthusiastic. You are the best motivational typer (lol) and punctuation checker ever.

* * *

In the midst of the sprawling Lightsbridge campus, the student's dining hall had been cleared, its many tables and benches removed from the floor's center and a stage set up at one end. The hall was filled with students, half of them craning to see the speakers that stood upon the platform and half of them staring into the air, obviously bored yet, not daring to speak to those around them. Most of the students were standing near the stage where the speeches were made, except for a stout redhead in a modest grey and blue dress. Tris stood back, far enough away from the stage that she was not crowded by those near the front, and near the middle of the room so she was away from the drafts of the papered windows. Her ears and eyes were sharp enough to pick up the speeches and the faces of the dozen mages seated on stage without forcing her to move into the crowd of bodies.

The head of the dormitories stepped back to allow the last speaker of the night to walk forward: an aging man that Tris recognized as the Headmaster of the school. This mage had been at the forefront of several of the greatest magical breakthroughs of his time, and had led the University of Lightsbridge for almost fifteen years. He had thinning white hair and wore expensive clothes in the older style of the region: a long, heavily embroidered, robe-like jacket.

He spoke slowly, but his words were clearly heard through the hall. "Welcome, students. This will be a changing experience for all of you. Lightsbridge University is a place of magic and academic learning. For those of you who are here to begin studies as mages tonight, you will be entering your three years of magical training. Some of you have already attended our classes here, and will have learnt the basics. Some of you have learnt magic elsewhere, and are continuing your education here. All of you have a mastering of the theories and control necessary to attend our prestigious University and to begin the arduous journey of becoming academic mages. All are welcome. All will reach their highest potential within-"

_Bor-ing. How are you standing this in person, Coppercurls? You have been listening to speeches for _hours_. And now him? _

_He is a great man, Briar. I will learn something from him._

_He'll give you a headache._

_He will not._

_Yup. Strike him down now, before the headache makes you more irritable and you toast your entire class._

Tris didn't bother to answer her foster-brother. A twitch of her power blocked him from her mind, and she focused again on the ancient man that stood in front of the new students.

"–walls. Your teachers are ready and willing to lead you on your journey. You will attend six classes throughout each week. Professors Forestwalker and Windmessenger will be continuing your work on theory," he gestured absently to his left. An unremarkable middle aged man raised his hand in a small, bored wave. The only woman seated on the stage looked up and nodded at the crowd. "Professor Clearwater, along with your dormitory leaders, will be working with you on control and meditation," Not one of the six acknowledged the introduction, although Tris assumed that it was the older man on the right, as a black-haired man gave him a raised-eyebrow in the moment of silence that followed the announcement of the name. Professor Clearwater seemed to be the oldest of her new teachers, with steel-grey hair and a slight stoop that Tris's eyes picked up, even though he held himself straight and glared above the heads of his new students. "Professor Thyme will instruct you on history," There was a wave and a nod from the ginger-haired man seated center. "Professor Barronscape will be teaching you spell structure," he was a tall man, towering over the others, even seated as they were. His hair and eyes were dark, contrasting against his light skin. "And Professor Ravenfeather will begin your introduction to practical magic," The young black-haired man smiled, and there was a small hoot from the crowd that made some giggle before the silence descended again. Tris looked around, but was too late to spot those involved. From Professors Clearwater and Forestwalker's glares, they had been, too.

The headmaster continued as if he heard nothing. "-and it is my hope that on that journey you will all find the knowledge of self and of others that will allow you to succeed. With success will come fulfillment. With fulfillment will come-"Tris finally blocked out the droning voice, admitting failure. She rubbed her forehead.

_Why is the thief always right?_ she thought, irritably. _He may have done great things, but he does give me a headache._

The students all clapped as the headmaster walked out of the room, with the teachers behind him. As the door shut behind them, there was an eruption of sound, the first since the speeches had begun after breakfast. The students stayed in the dining hall, most of them moving to the far wall, where food was being brought out by the university kitchen staff and set on the few tables that hadn't been removed to make space for the crowd to stand. Tris watched as the students lined up to grab wooden plates, small buns, cheese and slices from a cut of fowl. Small groups of students had already begun to form, cliques of pretty girls and flirting boys. Tris scowled. She had come here to learn, not to try to make false little friends and attend stupid parties.

_You could try, Tris_, Sandry's voice said in her mind.

_You wanted to be normal, after all. No one here will shy away from you, or exclude you. Just talk a little. It won't kill you_, Daja cut in.

_I don't want to try_, Tris replied, cranky with the pressure and the loneliness of leaving her family again.

A double sigh sounded in her head. _Oh, Tris_, Sandry said, exasperated.

Tris blocked them both. She didn't need them there. What did they know about this, anyway? Socializing was easy for them. Tris was always the one on the outside.

_It doesn't have to be that way here. It will take work, but when have I ever shied away from work?_ Tris asked herself.

She turned and walked towards the table of food, unsure of where to start. She walked through a breeze—there was a pickpocket ready to work the crowd in the city down the hill, an amateur by the look of him. Tris picked up a napkin, a piece of cheese and a bun and wandered away from the tables, into the middle of the room. Thinking of what Sandry would do, she smiled at a nearby group of people, but they didn't respond. A girl walked past her, alone, and Tris opened her mouth to start a conversation when the girl spotted someone she recognized and hurried away. Tris pursed her lips and looked down at her hands, picking apart the bun. She couldn't do this.

_And then what?_ she asked herself. _Spend the next three years sitting by yourself in class?_

She looked around the room again, analyzing the crowd in a different way. She tried to look past what she had seen as frivolous wastes of time on first glance. They were not as confident as they appeared. The vast majority of them did not know anybody, just like her. _Look for the weaknesses_, her foster brother had told her, years ago at Discipline, _Look for where there's a distraction, so you can slip in._ That had been about knife-fighting, but Tris could see how it applied to this 'fight'.

_Look for a group that needs a distraction_, she told herself. With a plan, Trisana Chandler could do anything.

Near the wall holding the food tables, near a small group of chattering nobles, two girls stood by themselves. One of them was a brunette with slightly tanned skin. She wore a dress made from expensive cloth and stood silent, her hands clasped awkwardly in front of her as she smiled at the conversation streaming from the girl she was standing with. The other girl was shorter, with lighter hair. Her teeth were visible from where Tris stood, as the girl talked non-stop. Every few moments the taller girl would throw a desperate look at the noble girls standing nearby, but no help was forthcoming. Tris saw the other girls' reactions: they either ignored her completely or glanced at her chattering companion and shrugged helplessly.

Wishing she were anywhere but where she was, Tris looked around the room again. There were no others standing alone as she was, and laughter seemed to be common to every other gathering of people. She weighed the option of sneaking away, but quickly discarded it. She'd have to meet her fellow students eventually, and meeting them after they had all made other friends would be even more difficult. Standing here alone was out of the question. She fixed her gaze on the small group and walked over.

The taller girl looked up as she approached, green eyes meeting Tris's grey. She smiled uncertainly, allowing it to grow when she was sure Tris was actually approaching her group. Tris made herself smile. The effort it took was not reassuring.

"Hello," she began as she reached the two girls. "I'm.... Siriana Farash," Tris said, giving the false name she, Niko and Sandry had made up before she left Summersea.

The girl smiled, introducing herself as Periann Gadrig. The chatty girl introduced herself as Darielle.

"Aren't you so very excited?" Darielle gushed, her small brown eyes fixed on Tris. _I'm fresh meat_, Tris thought uncharitably, scolding herself for the thought. _Be nice_, she reminded herself.

"This is just- it's Lightsbridge!" Darielle gushed. "A center for magic and academics. I mean, this is overwhelming! To be here, where all of these great people have studied. Can't you just not wait for classes to begin? I hope that the headmaster will eventually be one of our professors. He's a friend of the family, you know. My family has always been known for academic mages, along with being related to the nobility. Wasn't he an interesting speaker?"

Normally Tris would block out talk that she didn't care to listen to. Under the new mission of trying to act sociable, she forced herself to pay attention, and when the girl stopped for a breath, Tris thought it was her cue for a response. Never tactful, she said the first thing that came to her mind, "I thought he was really boring, myself."

There was a moment of silence. Tris found that there was no need to have blocked her siblings from her mind. She could hear their response clearly, just as if they were there. In unison: "Good old Tris."

Darielle looked at Tris scornfully, opening her mouth to scold her for impertinence, when the other girl, Periann, burst out laughing.

"Thank you, Siriana," Periann said, still giggling, "I felt I was the only one who had thought that speech was as boring as anything."

"He is a great mage-," Darielle started, but Tris cut her off.

"Greatness doesn't make you an interesting speaker, Darielle. And speaking constantly doesn't make you great."

Darielle stalked off, joining the group of nobles who were moving towards the table of food, and leaving the pair alone to Periann's giggles.

"That probably seems mean," Periann said to Tris. "But I've been trying politely to get her to stop talking since she adopted me on my arrival yesterday. When did you get here, Siriana?"

"Just Siri," Tris corrected. She had decided on the nickname after Niko had insisted on calling her Siriana for the week they spent in the city before the night's banquet. She had quickly grown tired of her new name. "I arrived last week."

"And you can call me Peri," Periann said, grinning. "I live in town with my family." She looked over at a group of boys as she said this. Tris examined them. There were only two brunettes in the group, and one of them looked so much like Peri that it was impossible not to count them as siblings. "Will you come with me to get a plate of food?" Peri smiled. "Boring speeches always make me hungry."

This time, Tris smiled with her. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, here.


	2. Far From Home

--------------------

They spent most of the afternoon socializing in the main hall after the lectures. There were almost no awkward silences between Tris and Periann, not because Tris found her footing in the situation but because Peri seemed capable of keeping a polite, intelligent conversation going without any help at all. She was very cheerful, with intelligent observations and a knack for asking the right questions. Peri quickly discovered that books were one topic Tris was capable of long discussions on and they chatted about their favorites while picking at the food they held on napkins.

When Tris mentioned, almost embarrassed, that social situations she was involved in did not usually turn out as well as their introduction had, Peri laughed.

"If you had ever met my father, you would understand," she said. "He can go days without speaking to anyone, he's so caught up in his work. I've had to keep his voice from disappearing from lack of use, as well as deal with all his social calls when he's in the middle of projects. Believe me, you are much more interesting than most of the people I've had to talk to! Did you really enjoy Tearow's histories? I didn't understand anything he was saying after the first chapter…"

With a few hours to go before dinner, the heads of the dormitories reappeared and collected their charges. They were to be shown the buildings where they would stay for their time at Lightsbridge, as well as meet their dormmates, and Peri and Tris went to their separate found the girls she was staying with, looking around at the other uncomfortable faces as their dorm supervisor introduced herself as Daeli and read a list of names. Together, they walked out of the dining hall, along a wide path that led down the middle of the campus.

"This is the most direct route to anywhere you want to go," Daeli said. "Down that way is the library and the main offices of the Headmaster and his staff. Beyond that are the research buildings and the professors' living quarters. This way is where the dorms and most of the classrooms are. Lightsbridge is not an easy place to navigate." She gestured to the side, and Tris looked at the side passages and alleys that seemed to have been placed with no forethought or organization. "If you get lost, find this walkway and go from there."

Daeli was a young woman doing her advanced studies, and had had years to learn how to get around the school. As they walked through the campus, they would often detour down an alley or through a building or under an archway so she could show them how to get to the University's important buildings. Finally, they walked across a small courtyard off the main path and into their building. On the first floor there was a door to the small, closed off courtyard for their lavatory and a door to the pathway outside. This common room had study desks and uncomfortable wooden chairs that they pulled into a circle where they sat as Daeli laid out the rules of the university and had each of them talk about themselves. Tris looked at the other girls she would be living with: they were all from merchant or working houses, like she was claiming to be, and they were all mage students. Other than that, they didn't have anything in common.

After the introductions, they went upstairs through a more comfortable common room with window seats that looked out over the walkway and into their dormitory. They had one long room to live in, together, and Tris had no idea how they were going to manage to get along. She was already cranky from the full day of social activities. She remembered the girl in the bed next to her was named Grenda only because she reintroduced herself as they chose beds. The names of the others were already forgotten. The dormitory supervisor told them that they had a little while until they were expected back in the dining hall for dinner. After assuring they remembered how to get back there she left them alone. There was an uncomfortable silence until someone suggested they sit in the common room. Grenda smiled shyly at Tris as she followed the other girls, who all moved back out and began to chat awkwardly in the next sat on the bed assigned to her, her luggage in a small pile on the floor. She listened to the conversation, but felt no desire to join them. This was too familiar; a new bed, strangers to live with, a knot of anxiety in her stomach that she would never allow to show on her face. How many times had she done this in her childhood? She ran her fingers lightly over the bump on the palm of her hand. Bright white, the scar reminded her of her family. It reminded her that the wandering life she had led should be over. But here she was again.

_This is for a reason_, she told herself. _To stop the stares and the whispers. To be independent, not needing the charity of my family. Even if, now, it is a family that loves me._

She remembered the last months she had with them, in Summersea.

"_Bleatbrain!" Sandry yelled, her eyes flaring._

_"Now, Duchess," Briar had replied, condescending and calm, "You- being so much higher than us lowly folk- shouldn't lower yourself to use language like that."_

_"You infuriating _thief_!" Sandry had stomped her foot on the workroom floor. Briar opened his mouth to yell a reply._

_"Shut up!" Tris and Daja snapped together, turning away from the small amulet they were creating._

Tris looked down at her chest, putting her hand over the small bulge that barely showed through the collar of her dress. It marked, if only for her, the two necklaces that she wore, linking her to Trisana Chandler. One was the credential from Winding Circle. She had been planning to leave that at home, to complete her identity change, but Niko and Lark had talked her out of it.

"Just in case," Lark had said.

_In case of what? In case I want to tell everyone that I'm accredited by Winding Circle as a weather-mage? In case I want them all to know who I am so they can treat me differently- envy and fear me?_ Tris took the necklace off and stowed it in her luggage, deep in a side pocket. She felt relieved as she sat down on the bed pulled out the other necklace from under her shirt. This had been their creation: a cotton tie that held an intricate amulet. It was a small, detailed work of knots, thin braids and ties holding little metal charms made of living metal. Sandry and Briar had worked at the cotton, placing plant and thread magic into it, making it strong. Sandry and Tris had worked at the knots and ties. Tris had learned from her hair, Sandry by years as a stitch witch and from a net maker years before. These strengthened the amulet, holding in its power. Daja had made the charms from living metal, giving the spell its form.

The resulting work of magic effectively hid Tris's very unique power from detection. No spell or mage would be able to see that she was anything but an academic, starting her training.

Even Niko had been impressed.

As long as Tris didn't do anything physical with her magic, such as having lightning dancing over her hair, no one would recognize her for who she truly was. It wouldn't matter if those that could see magic didn't see her as an ambient, everyone would know something was different if she blocked the rain, or listened to voices on the wind, or summoned lightning. That meant strict control over her power _and_ her considerable temper.

Tris closed her eyes, red-gold lashes against her pale face. Her strict expression melted slowly as she relaxed into meditation. Falling into her center, Tris did the housekeeping that would help her control her power. Gladly, she collected the loose lightning that was escaping the bright core of her inner magic, letting time pass as she did fell deeply into meditation.

Faintly, she felt a pressure on her body. As she came back to herself, she felt someone's hands on her shoulders and heard a tinny voice calling out nearby. Tris blinked her eyes open to find Periann's concerned eyes right in front of her face.

Tris gasped, jerking backwards, her sudden reaction causing Periann to do the same.

"What are you doing?" Tris snapped, surprise making her waspish as she sat back, gasping for breath.

"I'm sorry," Periann said. "Your roommates said you were in here and the door was open. I called you, but you didn't answer. I just thought you'd like to come downstairs for dinner: I've saved you a spot at my table and I'll introduce you to some of my friends," she trailed off, looking nervously at the scowl on Tris's face. "Or, not," she muttered, backing away a step. "I just thought-"

"No. No, I'm just startled. I was concentrating. I'll come down in a second," Tris assured the girl. With a cheery smile, Periann told her where to find the table, and left."Thanks!" Tris called, belatedly. She wasn't sure if the other girl heard or not, or if it was worth the extra effort. Tris put the end of one braid in her mouth distractedly. She didn't know what to feel. The fact that Periann had sought her out to invite her along had to be good, but meeting a crowd of people was daunting.

_Around food, no less_, she thought bitterly, thinking of her weight. Her siblings would have understood what she didn't want to try to tell Periann.

She missed them, even though the bonding that had formed over a broken barrier had not only left her a scar: their tie was stronger than ever, stretching even to Lightsbridge, keeping her with them.

She opened her mind, silently seeking out the three familiar presences that were never far from her thoughts, and now hardly ever out of her head.

In her mind, he smelled of fresh soil and pine resin. Briar was in the garden at Discipline. Through him, she could hear Rosethorn's cutting voice and his student's chatter. Evvy was in the white robe of a novice now— that had surprised Briar when they returned from Namorn, but he had since grown to agree with the decision she had made. Tris could feel the peace he found in the garden he knew so well with two people that he loved. She knew he didn't often feel that peace anymore, after Gyongxe.

_Anything for you, Coppercurls?_ he asked, sensing her there.

_Nothing for me, Briar_, she replied. He sent her a wave of supporting reassurance. He understood, of course. Neither of them would say out loud when they needed someone to lean on and it made them attuned to each faded out of contact, leaving him in the garden at home. Moving on, she found blistering heat, smoking metal, a roaring flame. Daja worked alone in the forge attached to the house the three shared, shaping metal into something that Tris couldn't identify.

_It'll be a frame, for a door, in a few days_, Daja told her, not losing a beat. Steady energy filled Tris without words of encouragement, lending her strength. The Trader turned and put her hammer down on the counter, grabbing the red hot metal in her hands and dunking it in water. Steam exploded around her face, mingling with her braids.

Tris found the last of them, with the feel of silk, the sound of the loom and the steady pace of the needle. Sandry sat in a wooden room, working on her newest project as she watched Pasco dance. There was a moment when Sandry wasn't aware of her, and Tris fell into the steady pace of embroidery and the thoughts of the dance.

_Are you alright, Tris?_ Sandry asked finally, concerned.

_Yes_, Tris replied.

_I am now_, she told herself, as she stood, shaking out the wrinkles in her skirts. Her grey eyes found the door with a new confidence. Then she strode out of the room, ready for the introductions.

--------------------


	3. Dinner

--------------------

The dining room was full of noise; loud voices, clinking plates, yells of anger, laughter, and the occasional crash as something was dropped onto the wood tables or stone floor. Filled with tables and benches again, the room where Tris had met Periann earlier that day was now cramped tight. All of the students ate here at this time of the evening, not just the newcomers that had been in here for the speeches. Tris got out of the doorway, moving along the wall with her eyes on the crowd, searching for Periann.

"Siri! Over here!" Tris's acute hearing picked out a familiar voice over the other noises of the hall, and she scanned the crowd, trying to find the speaker. At a far table, Periann stood up beside her seat, waving one hand high in the air. She made sure Tris was moving towards them before she sat down again. Tris tried to push through the crowded room, getting more and more impatient and frustrated. She felt her face beginning to flush with irritation. The urge to create a wind to get everyone out of her path was quickly crushed.

_You wanted to be normal_, she told herself, trying to breathe. She could feel her power on the edge of her mind, but her months of intense meditation in preparation for this pretense held, and she was able to push it away inside of herself.

When she moved towards the centre of the room, between the tables, the crowd thinned out and Tris was able to breathe normally again, and calmed down. She looked at the others sitting with Periann as she moved towards their table. The girl she had insulted after the speech, Darielle, was sitting at the far end of the table and glared at her when she approached. Tris ignored her. She had no time for silly grudges, but she was glad the other girls sat between the spot Periann was saving for her and Darielle. She wasn't sure she could deal with the girl's stupid chatter throughout dinner. Tris finally reached Periann's table, standing awkwardly behind Peri as the girl made the introductions.

The boy Tris had picked out of the crowd _was_ her brother, introduced as Raeg. He sat further down the table, in the middle of his friends, both boys and girls. Tris managed a weak smile and tried to remember all of the names. The girls sitting on Peri's side of the table wore clothes of the highest level, and Tris smoothed her hands nervously on her dress before she remembered that she, too, wore clothes of quality. Although simple, Sandry had outfitted her with a wardrobe to be proud of.

The boys and girls at the far end, with Raeg, dressed with style, but obviously with less money. Tris was looking at Raeg's outfit, which probably cost astrels less than his sister's when he looked up and met her eye. She blushed and looked away, back to the group Peri was introducing, but out the corner of her eye she saw him lean over to the dark-haired boy sitting beside him, whispering into his ear. After a moment, they both laughed, looking over at her. She felt her face turn bright red, blood splotching her cheeks. The feeling of humiliation at being the butt of another joke filled her brain with a miserable buzzing.

_He doesn't even know me_, Tris thought. _If he doesn't like Siri, what hope do I have?_

She ignored the rest of the introductions.

-----

A small library was located right beside the dining hall, a room that served as extra storage for the cheap or out of date books that had no place in the expansive libraries of Lightsbridge which drew intellectuals from all branches of research. Tris found her way into a far corner, hidden behind dusty columns of texts, under an open window.

Tris would have preferred one of the larger libraries, but this was the only one she knew the way to on her own and she wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone, not even to simply ask directions. She sat replaying the evening over in her mind.

By the time Peri had finished the introductions, Tris had been ready to throw off sparks. Anger, as always, had taken over for her other emotions and everything Raeg or his dark-haired friend, introduced as Tridian, had done just made her irrationally irritated. Periann had asked Raeg's friend Tridian to tell the new group stories of his exploits from his summer and Tris had been the only one to hold a stony silence while everyone else laughed. When Raeg asked her about her home, she was snappy, answering in one word where she could. He had shown no response to her sarcasm or silences.

Periann had asked her if she was all right enough times that Tris had been in the mood to take her head off too, along with her older brother's. She had looked down at her shaking hands, tightly clasped on her lap and Tris knew that she had had enough. Where would 'Siri' be if her braids started sparking? With a curt good-bye to Periann, she had left the dining hall, sure that their whispers were following her. If she had stayed any longer, she could very well have lost control.

_Not that holding back has done any good_, she thought, her anger fading slightly as she began to feel hurt, despite herself. _No matter how normal I try to be, I can never really fit in._

She hung her head over the closed book in front of her. She had blown it, and the worst part was, she hadn't done anything but be herself. Whatever had caused Raeg to pass on his remark about her had happened just at dinner, unless Peri had told him something about the welcoming banquet.

She felt a dull pounding in her head, brought on by keeping such strong emotions under such tight rein. Tris rubbed her temples, her headache flaring as the breeze came in through the window. The wind here was so filtered through the labyrinth of the university grounds that she barely got enough of a vision to distract her. However, the constant flashes of light, colour or movement caused headaches and would have made her look extremely twitchy, if she hadn't been trained by years of experience not to show notice of things others couldn't see. She wasn't even able to wear her special spectacles. They all had agreed that living metal ones were out of the question in her quest to stay inconspicuous. Sandry had flatly refused to let her pack her older coloured ones. She had told her they made her look odd.

Wind moved into the room as the door was opened, flowing up through the window above her head. It carried a picture of the young man moving through the stacks of books: long brown hair and a stony expression. Raeg had followed her to the library.

Tris flipped the book that had been left on her table open to a random page, trying to look as if she hadn't come into the room to escape. She flattened the pages just as Raeg came around the corner, and stopped right in front of her table.

"Can I help you?" Tris asked coldly, turning the page without looking at what she was reading. Raeg pulled the chair opposite Tris out with a loud scrape of wood on stone. He sat down in a single, angry motion.

"What is wrong with you?" he hissed, leaning over the table. Tris looked up to meet his glare with one of her own. "Peri is upset. She took the time to invite you to be with us, and that's how you repay her courtesy? Well, don't bother. We don't want you around anymore."

"_You_ never did," Tris snarled back, her temper getting away from her.

"What?" Raeg leaned back in his chair again, honestly startled.

"Oh, never mind. Just leave," Tris snapped, leaning into her book. She was too angry to even see the words in front of her, her vision blurring. If he continued this argument she would do something she would regret, and Tris wasn't ready to leave Lightsbridge. Not yet.

_Dreams die hard, I guess_.

"No. What the hell do you mean?" Raeg said, the anger back in his voice.

Tris shot him one of her legendary glares, grey eyes flashing behind her spectacles. He just raised his eyebrows, so reminiscent of a member of her foster-family that she was shocked into answering.

"I don't need you making fun of me behind your hand to your friend. I don't need to put up with the whispers and the snide comments here. I came for an education. I don't need your friendship!" Tris said, regretting her speech as soon as it was out of her mouth. She looked down at the book, trying to control her humiliation and her temper as the silence grew.

"Why did you think we were making fun of you?"

"Oh, why not?" Tris said quietly, still yelling at herself for giving a stranger- a rude, obnoxious, mean stranger- this much ammunition. The silence stretched out between them, and Tris could hear the dull sounds of dinner continuing in the next room. _Stupid place for a library_, she thought, angry at everything.

"I wasn't making fun of you," Raeg said, calm now. "I was just telling Tridian how you got rid of Peri's annoying little shadow, earlier. She attached herself to Periann the moment we got here, because...Well, because our father's very influential. But, mostly because he's rich," he said, bitterness a quiet echo in his voice. "Periann's too nice to get rid of her, and I— it's not my place. She's too well-behaved for her own good." Raeg said, shaking his head, and meeting Tris's eyes. "She told me about you after and I was impressed, and a bit grateful, even though you didn't know what you were doing for her. That's all. Tridian has been a friend for years, so he understood and he got the joke. It seemed like everyone here was sickeningly polite except the two of us. Well, the three of us, now that you're here," he added, grinning.

Tris's face was, again, bright red as she remembered the whisper that had made her so unpleasant during the dinner. She couldn't think of how to apologize for her behaviour without explaining why she had overreacted, and a history of all the insults she had been subject to was not going to be part of this conversation, thank you very much.

Raeg saved her from thinking up a response. "So, if you like, you're still welcome to come finish dinner with us. The meals are cheap, I'll admit that, but the desserts are always edible," he stood up and offered Tris a hand. "Come on, it's all a misunderstanding, so we can like each other again," he said when she didn't move to take it. "Unless, of course, you're enthralled by the Emperor's nasal warts, in which case, I'll leave you to it."

Tris looked at him blankly for a moment, unsure of where this random piece of conversation had come from. Raeg smile spread at the confusion on Tris's face, and she began to feel like another joke was being played on her. He must have seen the annoyance on her face, because he gestured at the book in front of her. Tris focused on the open pages for the first time. It was a journal by the First Healer of the third Emperor of Namorn. An entire page dedicated to a description of the Royal nasal warts and the various treatments, which Raeg had been reading upside down while they talked.

Tris began to blush, trying to decide between admitting that she had grabbed and opened a book at random and coming up with a plausible reason why nasal warts were interesting. She was saved, again, by Raeg laughing at the perplexed look on her face as she stared at the open book. "Just, don't explain," he said, gasping for breath. "It's so much better this way." Tris smiled in spite of herself. Raeg raised his eyebrow again as she stood without taking his hand, and they left together to rejoin his friends and Periann.

-----

Ten kilometers away someone else sat down to a meal. In a six-by-eight cell, the prisoner used the floor as both table and chair as he picked through the dry mashed potatoes and hunk of chopped meat, taking out the guards' surprises: small rocks, bits of metal, and bone. Without any distaste he moved the inedible pieces to one side of the plate and mechanically ate the rest. Putting the tray under the slot in the door, the prisoner sat again, turned to face the east wall.

His skin was pale from years out of the sun and slightly yellow from disease. His nails and hair were long and dirty. He wasn't permitted any kind of knife or file, even to tend to himself. Being allowed out of his cell to have cold water dumped on him only once a week left his long blonde-brown hair greasy and tangled. His clothes were mere rags, the same garments he had worn into the building ten years before. They were stained and hung awkwardly off of a frame that had lost a lot of weight since the time that they had been fitted for him.

Soon, he knew. It would be soon. The small piece of paper, slipped into his meal by a bribed guard almost a month ago had promised contact. With that contact would come the chance of release from this cell, if only he could promise one favour in return. After ten years of living inside his own mind, any favour would be granted without regret. He would spend this night, like every other since the message had come, staring at the wall, looking east over the city, if only he could see through stone.

-----

Ten kilometers away, almost due east, Trisana Chandler, now known as Siriana Farash, removed her spectacles, and settled into bed, listening to the small shuffles as the other girls in her dormitory did the same. As Tris drifted off to sleep, she shivered slightly, even though the nights were not yet cold at Lightsbridge.

--------------------


	4. On the Wind

A/N Barley Moon=September

--------------------

Tris opened her eyes to the grey light of dawn filtering through the window. She briefly considered falling asleep again but years in Winding Circle, and with her cousin Uraelle before that, had trained her body to wake up and _stay_ up with the sun. She sat in bed, the long room blurry as if she were underwater until she found her spectacles and shoved them on her nose. Her surroundings jumped into focus.

Along the opposite wall were seven wood dressers, one for each of the girls to store their belongings: books, clothes, and writing and magical supplies. At the far end, on the same wall that was lined with dressers, was the door that led to the little common room. Seven beds had been set up for the girls, one opposite each dresser. The other girls were still huddled under their covers, protected from the Barley Moon mornings which already cool.

Tris slipped out of bed, her feet finding the slippers Sandry had given her, part of a goodbye-present wardrobe that would keep her warm. She pulled the covers up behind her, leaving the bed smoothly made before she walked to the one window that lit up the room. Tris had chosen the bed furthest from the door to be close to the window. She used the thin sleeve of her nightgown to wipe away the moisture that had collected on the cold glass and looked out over Lightsbridge.

The grounds were a huge maze of buildings that had been added to periodically over the years, making a haphazard collection of alleys, walkways and tiny stone courtyards. It had started as a small grey building that taught the rich young men of the capital in fine arts, magic and history and had grown from there, buildings being added for nearly fifty years, until the wall stopped its growth. Some of the buildings were simple, wood or built out of the grey stone that was plentiful in the Karang quarries, and some were ornately carved. All had the steeply slanted roofs with wooden tiles or planks, which Niko had told her were built that way so that the weight of the snow didn't cause them to cave in. The haphazard adding on of the campus meant that it was now practically a maze; unorganized alleys led through or around the buildings, narrow pathways that led in circles and plenty of dead ends meant that Tris knew would take the better part of the year to learn it by heart.

Tris could also see the wall that kept the University students separate from the city's population. It rose twenty feet into the air, with four foot high barricades lining the thick walkway on top. Every thirty feet along the wall there were stone alcoves that had been built to protect the guards from winter winds. Now, Tris knew, those were places for student sightseers. The mages here deemed themselves enough protection for the students and the fortune in rare books and magical artifacts that the university housed. The school had even long since banned the city's law enforcement— the genarmed— from crossing their walls uninvited.

When the window started fogging up again Tris walked over to her dresser to get ready for the day. She was awake long before the other girls would even begin to stir, and planned to put the time to good use. She sat on her bed and began to meditate, quickly falling into the ritual that she had set for herself in the years she had spent controlling her power, and more specifically, in the months she had spent preparing for the school. This strict control meant her meditation time was growing shorter and shorter. She had also cut down on her use of magic while at Lightsbridge. For an ambient mage whose magic was so much a part of everyday life, she knew that it would impossible to cut it out of her life entirely.

When Tris opened her eyes, the light had become warmer— less the grey light of early morning and filtering into the yellows that meant the sun had risen over the horizon. The beginning of her last free day before classes, which started the next morning. Tris found herself wishing that the day was already over. Awkward socializing and uncomfortable situations were not what she had come to Lightsbridge for.

_Give over, Coppercurls,_ Briar said, his thoughts coming through with the smells of his small, but growing herb garden beside their house in Summersea. _You know you had fun._

_Didn't anyone ever tell you that eavesdropping is rude?_ Tris sent back, more annoyed that Briar was right than that he was paying attention to her moods.

The rest of the dinner_ had_ been fun. Periann had said nothing about Tris's temper, and hadn't asked why she had walked away. Instead, Peri greeted her with a smile and continued the conversation. Listening in had gotten Tris acquainted with the small group of Raeg's friends. Tridian, Eurey and Dominik made up the young men of the group, along with the two young women— Theirry and Anmie. The entire group was loud and outgoing, with a certain dislike for rules and propriety that would set Tris on edge if she spent too much time with them. On the other side of Periann were the noble girls from Peri's dorm. After they heard that she was from a merchant family, that Tridian's people were fishers and that Anmie had travelled with Traders they had ignored them for the rest of the evening. Tris just shrugged. She had more than enough company.

There was a knock on the dorm door, quiet enough that Tris waited a moment to make sure she hadn't imagined it. The door creaked open and Periann poked her head around the corner. The girl looked around the room, beaming when she spotted Tris awake, her green eyes a little puffy but already cheerful.

_Perfect. A morning person_, Tris thought, rightfully wary after four years at Winding Circle with Sandry.

"Why doesn't it surprise me that you're an early riser?" Periann whispered, hurrying across the stone floor and bouncing down on Tris's bed with a wide smile. Tris had learned the night before that Periann's father was head of the Karang capital's law enforcement, the genarmed, a position equal to that of the Lady Provost in Emelan. He would be a lesser noble put in charge of the trained men and women who kept the peace in the cities. In Emelan, Duke Vedris appointed his Lady Provost to run the Provost's Guard based on her dedication to detail and attitude: she was able to make the most hardened criminal or guard feel like a scolded child in her presence. Tris had heard the Lord Genarmed kept his city in a similar state of order. Tris wondered if Periann acted this way at home, and doubted it. She seemed the kind to be everything everyone else wanted her to be, and so a proper young woman for her important father.

"It doesn't surprise me that your bed is already made, and you're dressed, too," the girl continued. "I thought that you'd be the kind of person to do that right away. You seem to like things neat." She didn't give Tris time to reply as she rushed from thought to thought. Tris was glad: she always felt like her jaw was locked shut in the morning. Any words forced out of her before breakfast came with a large amount of bark.

_She probably has experience dealing with people who can't string two words together before their morning tea_, Tris thought, watching her tuck a rogue piece of hair back into her ribbon. She knows not to ask questions and expect to get answers. _That means she's gotten her head bit off before._ Tris wondered briefly which of Periann and Raeg's parents were the grouchy riser, but she cut herself off. It was none of her business.

"I'm ready for breakfast," Periann concluded, smoothing out her skirts. "Do you want to come down with me? They serve tea, bread and butter, and porridge, usually." The other girls were beginning to stir— some just to pull the covers firmly around their ears while others braved the floor, dashing across the cold stone to get their slippers if they hadn't put them beside their beds the night before. Peri looked over at them when she made her invitation, as if expecting that Tris might want to go down with one of them.

"Afterwards, Raeg told me that we have to come with him and his friends," Peri comtinued. "They have this tradition that they do before classes start up after breaks. Top secret." Periann rolled her eyes at the stupidity of brothers, but her smile grew to a grin when Tris agreed to accompany her to both the breakfast and the 'top secret' tradition.

"I imagine you want something to do to pass the day, to get to classes tomorrow. You enjoy classes, don't you?"

_Told you you were enjoying yourself_. Tris could hear the smirk in Briar's thought. She ignored him.

-----

The prisoner looked up, his acute hearing picking something up beyond the static the warding magic caused in his brain. A single word, filtering into his brain.

_Today_, the voice said. The prisoner smiled, the first time in over two years.

The guards outside the room spat on the floor nervously when they heard the prisoner begin to laugh.

-----

Raeg just laughed at his sister when she demanded to know what was going on. The four boys and two girls led Tris and Periann through the labyrinth grounds, towards the west side of the campus.

The rest of his friends laughed too, energized by the excitement of an old game. Tris was distracted. She could hear something... a loud rush...

The six led the two girls up on top of the wall, where they looked out over the city: dark grey under a bright blue sky.

"Wow," Periann sighed, taking in the sights.

"You haven't seen anything yet," one of Raeg's male friends, Dominik, promised.

"We thought up a way to have one last bit of fun before we start our classes," Raeg grinned, looking at his friends as they nodded their agreement.

"Raeg! That's not why this is important!" Thierry said, her hands on her hips in mock indignation as her brown hair flew into her eyes. The other girl, Anmie— a quieter girl with hair a shade of startling blonde— stood beside her, nodding her agreement as she giggled. They were older than the boys, in upper year classes. Although Raeg was a year older than his sister, this would be his first year taking classes on magic. Tris thought he must have been taking academic classes the year before to know the campus and the older students so well, but no one said and she didn't want to draw the group's attention by asking.

"Right," Raeg agreed, pretending to be seriously chastised. "This is a way to blow away our mistakes and bad luck of last year, and hopefully pass."

"So as to avoid the wrath of our parents," Tridian chimed in.

"The gods be willing!" Eurey said fervently, causing the rest of the group to chime in, laughing.

Raeg pulled his sister and beckoned Tris into one of the stone alcoves Tris had seen from her window just that morning, blocking their view of the city. Periann tried to ask more questions, but Raeg cut her off. "You'll see in a second, Periann," he promised, stepping back into the open air. Tris felt the need to cover her ears. The roar was growing louder.

"What is he playing at?" Periann mumbled, looking at the group of six, all braced against the wall, looking out over the city.

"Here it comes!" one of them yelled. Tris gasped as the roar grew louder, and as she felt it come rushing up the wall, she realized what it was.

Wind.

-----

The prisoner waited in the silence of his cell, knowing that something was happening outside the thick stone walls, but unable to do anything but wait. His unknown benefactor would come, or he wouldn't. That was out of his control.

A rattle in the hall outside, and the door opened, revealing a tall man with brown skin and dark hair. The stranger looked down at the figure sitting calmly on the floor of his cell.

"Veriv Truethought," the stranger addressed the prisoner over the noise of the fight with the nearly-overcome guards. "Have you agreed to our conditions, or should I lock this door?"

The prisoner stood, his brown eyes daring the man opposite to try. There was no way he was going to be locked up again. He would die before he was locked up again."I take that as a 'yes'," the stranger said, smirking.

-----

The city streets were natural pathways for the strong winds that grew in the area to run along, and they ran directly into the University wall. The wall had a narrow walkway bordered by a waist-high wall, enough to keep sightseers from falling off, but not sufficient to hide defenders from attack. The guardhouses had been kept as a nod to the genarmed, who once kept the peace in the university, just as they did now in the rest of the city, and for aesthetics, not for any real purpose. Every few minutes, in the early fall and spring, a gust would rush along the city, hit the wall and travel up to hit whatever was in their way. Right now, that was Raeg and his friends.

The group of teenagers laughed and screamed as the strong winds threatened to push them over the edge of the wall, pulling on their clothes and hair, and forcing them to squeeze their eyes shut. As quickly as it had come, it was gone, leaving the group exhilarated and chattering.

Periann clutched her chest as she stood with Tris in the small alcove, watching the group brace for another gust of wind to hit the wall. Raeg looked over at the girls, laughing, his shoulder-length hair tangled and messy.

"Get out here!" he yelled at them.

"Are you crazy?" Periann shrieked back. "You are going to be killed!"

Raeg just laughed, looking at Tris with an invitation in his face. Tris longed to feel the wind, just once. Any wind of that strength felt joy at being free on the currents, and Tris knew what it was like to fly free. Cooped up in the university, feeling this wind's joy would be the next best thing. If she could take the visions that would come along with it.

Tris could hear the wind coming, the roar in her ears, and the joy of the almost animate chorus that made up every wind's voice. The thrill of a direction, a meaning, a path. Although Tris knew she would never really be able to block them out, she was able to sort through the visions much better than she had even last summer. She stepped out beside Raeg as the wind neared the wall, hearing Periann's shriek and Raeg's laugh of delight. He grabbed hold of her arm, both of their eyes fixed on the city.

"Brace yourself!" he yelled over the roar. He staggered as the wind hit, but Tris stood straight and tall. The wind welcomed her in its chorus, flowing through the power in her hair.

Suddenly, the breathtaking view was replaced with a dingy room, filled with smoke that was carried on a tiny breeze traveling from one tiny half-open window through the hallway to another window on the opposite wall. The breeze moved stiffly through the thick air, over two men who stood glaring at each other.

"Do we have a deal?" the darker of the two men asked, pulling a leather bag off his belt and pushing it toward the other. The other ignored him, instead looking up and through the breeze, his dark eyes seemingly fixed on Tris. His dark blond hair hung past his shoulders in greasy twists and his face was painfully thin. Those eyes were alive, though, and they held power that the emaciated body didn't show. Tris felt a thin tendril of power try to hook into her, linking her to the mage, but she zapped it away with a bolt of magic, a quick defense the four had been taught years ago. As abruptly as it had came, the vision faded.

"Siri!" Raeg yelled, grabbing onto her as she fell backwards, caught unaware by a last, stronger gust of wind that toppled her almost off the wall before she was fully free of the vision. She would have fallen off the twenty-foot high wall if Raeg hadn't pulled her back in time.

He steadied her as they both tried to catch their breath. "You feel like taking a nosedive, warn me next time," he said, looking down at her. A shriek distracted them both before Tris had time to snap back at him for his teasing. She hated being scared.

Eurey was on top of the barrier, hovering inches from empty space. Raeg and Dominik grabbed onto him, pulling him down to safety before the wind took him flying. Tris took the moment to slip away unnoticed.

_What happened, Tris?_ A concerned voice asked. Sandry, of course. The first to jump to the defense of her friend, even if that friend was miles away. _What was that?__Nothing!_ Tris snapped, fear making her reply sharper than she wanted it to be, _I'm fine!_

_Right, merchant girl. And I'm the King of Sotat. Feed us another_, Briar's voice joined in.

Tris forced herself to take a deep breath and calm down as she walked down the wall stairs and onto solid ground. Her scare wasn't Sandry's fault.

_Sorry,_ she sent privately to the noble girl before she sent a quick series of images to her three siblings, explaining the weird sensation of being seen and contacted through a vision.

_Looks like he spent time locked up_, Briar thought to them, bitterness of his experience in Yanjing echoed in his voice.

_But you're seeing the past right?_ Daja asked. _You're seeing that place as the wind had moved through it. That means that creepy _kaq_ would have had to see into the future, through the wind to see you?_

_And send his magic through to try and track you down_, Sandry added, sounding worried.

_Is that possible?_ Briar asked.

_I don't know_, Tris replied, finding an undisturbed courtyard to stand in while she continued her conversation. She took a deep breath when she realized that she was trembling

_I wish Niko were around_, Sandry thought wistfully. The others agreed with her. Niko had 'happened by' Winding Circle to help Tris prepare for her departure. After he had accompanied his student to the Lightsbridge, however, he had disappeared on the travels he had put off for the years he was with the four. He would stop by Winding Circle again at some point— he always did— but they had no way of knowing when, and no reliable way of reaching him until he did. It would have been nice to have his experience.

_Well, what is a full library on magical workings worth if it can't help you now?_ Daja asked, no nonsense, as always. _Look it up, merchant. You're good at that._

_And we'll ask around here_, Sandry promised. _Be careful,_ _Tris._

_Watch your back_, saati, Daja added.

_Don't fret, you two!_ Briar said, disgusted. _Girls! Tris is tough. You know, for a skirt._

Tris smiled a little as she faded out of contact. The reassurance of her siblings had bolstered her spirits, even if they hadn't gotten anywhere. They could handle this together.

-----

The dark-eyed man blinked into the distance, staring at the air as if there was something to see in the rat-hole.

"Is there a deal?" Ramin repeated, hiding his nervousness well. He had been paid to appear for a stranger, repeat him a deal and pass on some money. He hadn't known, when he took the money, that the man he would be paid to talk to could make his hair stand on end simply by being in the same room, nor that his skin would crawl when those dark eyes fell on him. There was no money in Karang that would get him back in the presence of this former prisoner.

The prisoner, Veriv Truethought, opened the satchel, examining the money being offered for his part in what was to be played.

--------------------


	5. Power

A/N I'm using the days of the week directly from the notes at the end of _Cold Fire_. Just so it's not confusing, I'll put the ones used in each chapter in my A/Ns.

Moonsday=Monday

Starsday=Tuesday

--------------------

Classes began on Moonsday and Tris woke up early enough that she had time to read one of the texts for practical magic as the other girls rushed around the dorm getting ready. They all left for their first class together, getting lost only once as they made their way across campus. Meditation was in a wide hall where they sat on the ground and listened to Professor Clearwater, the grey haired man who refused to acknowledge them at the opening speeches, outline his expectations. Most of the students stared at him, silent with fear or irritation. Tris met Peri's eye, from where the girl was sitting across the room with her dorm mates. Peri made a face at Tris behind Clearwater's back as he told them of the penalties for 'misbehaviour'.

Classes were held scattered through the grounds, mostly in out-of-the-way buildings or rooms that weren't needed by the professors and researchers that lived and worked at Lightsbridge. To them, their research was their most important task. The students were a minor concern and, often, an inconvenience.

Professor Lucien Ravenfeather was not one of these teachers, Tris realized as soon as she walked into her second class of the day. His classroom looked like almost all of the others. On one side were the steep bleacher-like seats that held the students: it rose ten levels, where it met the back wall. In front of the bottom row was a small aisle, and then a step onto a platform that held the teacher's desk and lecturing podium. When Tris walked into the room, five minutes early, a group of students were already there, crowded around his desk. Not wanting to draw attention to herself by pushing into the crowd, Tris chose a front and center seat and started putting her books and writing kit down on the half-desk.

"See here, this is what makes the whole experiment work!" an enthusiastic male voice said. "As soon as I figured this out, the whole thought process smoothed out. Just like yours will when you stop drinking, Tridian." The group laughed and ribbed their grinning classmate. "Before this, the power would just run into the ground, or into the air. It would not move along into this compartment. Can you see why that changed the course of the power, Hamen? Oh, not you, too! Never mind, tend to your headache. Raeg?"

Tris lost Raeg's answer as Peri's dormmates burst into the class and climbed to the top layer of the seats, settling noisily. Peri herself stopped in front of Tris for a moment, waving to Raeg, who was still near the professor's desk as she asked Tris to sit with her. Tris had to only think of Darielle— the other girl had yet to stop glaring whenever they made eye contact—in order to refuse politely. Peri just smiled when Tris declined, knowing the reason behind it, and promised to meet her for lunch before she climbed the bleachers and joined the rest of her group. When the entire class was either seated or crowded around the front listening to the teacher explain his gadget Ravenfeather looked up and sighed softly.

"We'll look at it next class— time for some actual work," he said and called order to the class. The rest of the group sat down around and behind Tris, and she was granted her first up-close look at her professor.

Just reaching middle age— young for a Lightsbridge professor— Lucien Ravenfeather was tall, skinny, and Tris could clearly see why he had chosen the name 'Ravenfeather' when he had become a mage. His hair was blue-black and clumped on his head in feather-like pieces that fell around his forehead and ears. Never one to judge people on the appearance of their noses considering her own bad luck, Tris couldn't help but note Ravenfeather's. Long and thin, it curved down at the end, giving him a distinctively bird-like quality. Tris either had to applaud his humour, or pity the behind-the-back jokes he didn't understand and must have endured since he chose the name.

Ravenfeather smiled at the class, and Tris admitted it was probably the former. He gave off a distinct impression of appreciating a good joke, even if it was at his own expense. "I am happy to see you all here, awake, alert, and mostly sober. That is a feat, for most of you," he said, to the chuckles of most of the class. "And I appreciate the effort, even if you only did it to escape the wrath of your other, more frightening teachers." This got a real laugh out of the class, who by now had heard all the horror stories about the ones that would be teaching them for the next three years and had experienced Professor Clearwater firsthand.

Ravenfeather spent most of the class going through what they would be studying and how he would be marking them. He often got distracted, telling the class a humourous story, or talking about his latest experiments before getting back on topic. Tris shook her head as he tried to remember what he had been saying, scratching his head and smiling at the class as they tried to help. Finally he gave up, jumping up onto the platform and flipping through the messy pile of notes that were scattered across his desk.

"Ah, yes," he laughed, looking up from the notes. "Power," Ravenfeather started. "Being granted power. That is what this class is all about: it starts that buildup of power in all of you. Many of you have attended Lightsbridge classes before, for control or academics, but this should be the first time you work on becoming mages.

"So, what is power?"

"Strength," one student said, looking around the class for approval.

"Ability," another added.

"The ability to what? The strength of what?" he pressed the class.

"The ability to do what you want, to make your mind and magic do what you want," a girl from the back of the class shouted out. "Strength in...." she trailed off, trying to think.

"Body? Mind? Magic?" Professor Ravenfeather asked.

"All of them!" she exclaimed, causing some giggles at her enthusiasm.

"To never have to depend on others," a familiar voice said quietly. Tris turned to look at Raeg, who was sitting two levels up and slightly to her left, but she couldn't be certain it was him who had actually spoken before another student cut in.

"To help those who need help, and to take down those that would do harm," said a girl from Tris's dorm.

"How do we know what harm is?" the professor asked, sitting on top of his desk and looking at the confused class.

"When a person, or society gets hurt," the girl at the back added again.

"Come on, Lilt, examples! You know better."

"Um," the girl, Lilt, thought. "Well, if someone murders people. Or if they steal." "What if they murdered a person who steals?"

"What?" The class giggled again, but no one else offered an answer to the professor's question.

"Which person would be wrong? The murderer or the thief? If the thief is wrong, do you condone murder? And if the murderer is wrong, what right do you have to punish the thief, instead?"

"If they break laws-"

"What if they believed the laws were wrong? What if the laws_ were_ wrong? Then, would that person be punished, even though they did what was right?"

"Yes, if they broke the law."

"No, they shouldn't," Tris turned around quickly enough to be sure it was Raeg, this time. "You should do what is right, no matter the consequences," he continued. "That's what power is for. To make our own way in life, regardless of what others think.""'Regardless of others'?" Ravenfeather asked. "Come on, class, none of you think that this is the wrong idea? What am I turning loose on the world," he asked, shaking his head in mock sorrow. Raeg grinned at him.

Tris could see the image of a murderer, pinned against the wall by her own rage, and remembered the admittance that it wasn't her place to be the punisher.

"Power shouldn't be about what you can change," Tris found herself saying softly. "You have no way of knowing what you will do when you decide to act, no way of knowing what you will bring about."

"Exactly!" Ravenfeather praised, pointing at Tris before knocking his fist on his desk in emphasis. "Every action has its reactions! Everything you do, from a great magical working, to a drinking binge the day before classes," Ravenfeather shot another amused look at Tridian and Hamen, causing a burst of laughter from the class while they grinned sheepishly. "Everything causes something else to happen. If you catch a thief, his family might starve. If you kill a murderer... Then, what have _you _become?"

A loud bell echoed through the grounds, cutting off Professor Ravenfeather before he could ask for a response from his class. Everyone stood up, stuffing books and papers into their satchels. They had a five minute run to get to their next class, clear across the grounds and most professors wouldn't open their doors to a late student, no matter how far they had to travel.

"Think about what you would do if you had the power to do anything! I want good answers for tomorrow's class! I have you longer on Starsday, so don't think you can get away with hiding at the back!" Ravenfeather yelled over the noise, as everyone moved towards the door. Peri swept by with her noble friends, giving Tris a small wave before she was out the door. Tris left the class last, avoiding the crush of people by packing up her belongings slowly. Not wanting to give Ravenfeather the idea that she wanted to speak to him, she averted her eyes and rushed from the class as soon as the doorway was clear.

The class opened directly into a small courtyard. She was already a few paces into the open air before she noticed Raeg. He had waited outside the door, leaning against the wall. Thinking that he had wanted a word with the professor, she kept walking through a stone archway that led into a long alley between two buildings. Raeg caught up to her instead of going back into the class, shortening his long strides to match her pace.

Tris stared straight ahead, feeling a slight blush on her cheeks as she tried to think of something to say. She had never been good at the niceties!

"What would you do?" he asked, breaking the silence and drawing Tris from her struggle to think up a witty comment.

"What do you mean?" she asked back, her voice sharper than she meant it to be. She had always hated cryptic questions.

"Professor Ravenfeather's question. If you had power, the power to do anything, what would you do?" he clarified, walking with her through large wooden doors, into the dusty side hall of a building used for the second-level anatomy classes.

Tris hardly paid attention to the shortcut he was leading her on. Instead, she debated giving him her true answer. Should she answer like she thought the students would answer? Like someone who didn't have power? Like someone who hadn't seen exactly what power could do, and hadn't dealt with the nightmares afterwards? When he opened the door for her to go through and gave her a questioning glance, Tris told him the truth. "I'd just be like everyone else," she admitted softly, not looking back at him.

There was a silence between them as he shut the door and walked with Tris down the red-stone steps into the conversations and movement hall outside their next class. The professor hadn't opened the door yet. "Strange," he remarked lightly as they stopped in back a bit from the crowd, watching their fellow students chat and roughhouse. "I'd wish for the opposite. I'd wish for the power to make a difference, to make my mark on the world. People like me don't get that often," he said, bitterness marring his last sentence.

Curiosity got the better of politeness, as usual, and Tris blurted out what was on her mind. "What do you mean? Isn't your father the Lord Genarmed in the city?" Raeg gave her a strange glance, and she quickly explained her knowledge away as girl gossip. In reality, the winds had brought her the name of the head of the city's law enforcement, the equivalent to the Lady Provost in Emelan, and she had linked the name to Peri and her brother.

Raeg nodded, obviously debating how much he wanted to tell Tris. She couldn't bring herself to be insulted, since she had done the same only seconds before.

"Periann and I are both Our Lord's children," he said, voicing the title in the most bitter tone she had heard him use. "But only Periann is legitimate. My mother was a...Well, she wasn't my father's wife, anyway," he covered, embarrassed. Tris nodded, keeping her face neutral so he wouldn't see the pity she felt. The illegitimate children of any high-ranking member of society had to face constant snubbing and social blocks.

_As if it was their fault_, Tris thought sarcastically. She was surprised Raeg had been accepted to Lightsbridge— a school very concerned with its image— and that he was as popular as he was, considering that his birth had to be common knowledge.

"You both must look like your father, then," Tris stated, matter-of-factly. Raeg looked startled for a second before letting out a relieved laugh and nodding. The professor opened the door and students started moving slowly into the classroom. Tris thought about Raeg, his circumstances and his wish for power. _If he only knew what it brings on those who have it_, Tris thought, weighed down by the memories. _Would he still want what I have?_

_--------------------_


	6. Unanswered Questions

--------------------

Tris turned the page. She stared at the beginning paragraph for a full minute before she realized that she had absolutely no idea what she was reading about and flipped back to the previous page, trying to find the place where she had stopped absorbing information, pursing her lips when she realized it was a full four paragraphs up the other page. She narrowed her eyes as she reread, scowling the entire time.

She had found one of the larger libraries of the university which held some of the more obscure magical books. It was a large room with floor to ceiling bookshelves along the wall, and forming a circle in the middle of the room. Tris sat at one of the tables inside this bookshelf ring during her break between her last class and dinner and searched until she found all the books she could on windscrying. There were very few references to windscrying at all, which was almost understandable considering there was only one mage a generation who had the talent. When her search through the books that were there served up a small paragraph describing the talent and a few small subtitles she searched for books on scrying in general. The problem was she already owned, and had memorized, the best book on the subject and had never heard of what had happened to her that day on the wall. She doubted anything she found in here could be more useful to her on the subject. If her book didn't mention this, what would?

Her foster-siblings hadn't been any help on the subject, either. None of their teachers had heard about anything like it and they had not been able to find anything useful in the Winding Circle library. Sandry wrote a letter to Niko, with all three of them editing it through her mind until she blocked them out, but they didn't expect a reply for some time.

No one had ever heard of someone being able to reach through a vision with magic. Rosethorn had argued, through Briar, that maybe another weather mage would be able to pull it off, if one could send magic over the wind. Lark had said, through Sandry, that he might not have to be a weather mage at all— it all depended on how much Tris put out into the wind in order to scry. Maybe a small piece of her magic or her mind went with it? After all the debates they still hadn't been any closer to an answer. And after almost a full day of reading, Tris wasn't either.

Tris was furious that the all of these books couldn't answer her questions. She hated mysteries and this was a big one. How did he reach through the vision? Was it through the wind or through the magic? Was he reaching through time as well or did it only work if she was seeing a vision of what was happening at the exact moment? What did he see, or sense, of her? Could he be able to track her now?

Tris did a check of her magic while she picked up an armful of books to put back onto the shelves. She did not feel any foreign magic that would provide her unknown assailant with any kind of tie to her.

_If he saw me, or saw where I was he could find me_, Tris thought as she wandered through the aisles slowly reducing her load. She smirked smugly at the thought of what she'd do if he did try to find her.

_Be Siri_, she chided herself as her thoughts turned to lightning, hail and strong winds. _I'm not Tris here, and I cannot react like that._

She returned to her table to grab the last of the books she had pulled when one of the university staff hurried up to her.

"Siriana Farash?" The staff of the university were recognizable from their uniforms and this lightly grey haired woman was one of the secretaries who worked with the university's mages: her cotton dress was dark blue with a silver trim. When Tris nodded to the woman's question she received a scowl. "You are a hard young woman to find!" she was scolded. "The Headmaster wants to speak to you, if you'll follow me to his office please? Leave the books on the table, the library staff will replace them." Tris frowned at her sharp tone, but she followed the woman into the hallway and towards the centre of the campus, where the staff lived and worked. "They're used to picking up after the students, sure enough." The woman said, speaking of the library staff. She smiled thinly as she glanced back at her silent follower. "The students are always late for classes or parties, it seems."

Tris's guide led her down a garden path towards the oldest building on campus. It had four stories and took up a large portion of Tris's vision on either side. Covered wooden walkways led into the smaller buildings surrounding it. In the centre of the building were large double doors made out of decorated hardwood.

_Cherry_, Briar informed her as the three surveyed the building from Tris's eyes.

Tris did not bother to respond. Her stomach was beginning to cramp with nerves as she thought through some of the reasons the Headmaster would summon her to speak to him. What did he want? What if he tried to remove her from the school?

_What will I do then?_ Tris asked herself, her stomach clenching again.

The first story of the building held the offices of the secretaries. The assistant teachers and instructors shared the second and third floor, and the Headmaster and his administrators staffed the top of the imposing building.

Tris was nervous when they walked through the doors into the wide hallway of the first floor, and was huffing by the time they made it up the third flight of stairs. The secretary led her down the hallway and asked her to wait in a small room they entered together. She knocked on a door at the far wall, opened it and spoke to someone on the other side. Tris eyed the comfortable-looking chairs that were arranged on the side walls which did not hold doors but she was ushered into the next room by the secretary before she could sit.

The door was shut firmly behind her as the Headmaster stood up from his desk to greet her.

Tris had thought he was a boring speaker and observed little else. This close, as he shook her hand and gestured at one of the chairs in front of the desk, she noticed that he was old, older than Niko, but that his eyes were sharp and he was steady on his feet. She could see the power that he still wielded, the bright sun that marked him as a great mage.

He stood until she had taken her seat and then relaxed into his chair, smiling as he spoke. "It is a pleasure to have you here, Miss Chandler. I hope you're enjoying the campus so far?" he smiled indulgently when she nodded. "I was surprised to get a letter from Niklaren, however this is not the first time a student has registered under a false name. Not the same situation, though, not at all. The only other student who asked for registration under a different name was the son of an arsonist who did not want to be connected to his father's crimes. In that situation his teachers knew who he really was, but Niklaren and I are in agreement that only the two of us, and whomever you have decided to inform of course, will be aware of your identity. It's not every day that we have a student arrive under an assumed name who is already quite accomplished."

"Being accomplished is one of the reasons for the assumed name, Sir."

"Of course. All ambient mages deal with a great deal of suspicion and misunderstanding— you more than most, if you do not mind my assumption."

Tris shook her head, surprised. He noticed her raised brows. "I have seen many mages, both academic and ambient over my long years here at Lightsbridge," he explained. "But I think some of your teachers may have as hard a time as your fellow students if they knew and you have the right to an equal education. Now, all I need is a signature on some of these papers," he leaned over the desk to put the papers in front of her. "To be frank, my secretaries could have taken care of it but I wanted to meet the student of an old colleague. I have a great deal of respect for Goldeye. Niklaren and I taught courses here together, back in the day. He moved on to other things, as you know, while I stayed on here." Tris remembered her foster-mother Lark thanking the heavens that Niko had gotten away from the school but she didn't want to insult the Headmaster. Instead, she smiled and made an interested noise. The papers were variants on the same information: that she actually was Trisana Chandler and understood and verified that she was studying as Siriana Farash. She read through the papers while the Headmaster spoke a little further on the subject of Niko until she was done. He took the papers, tucking them into a drawer in his desk and stood to escort her to the door.

"It's been my pleasure to meet you, Miss Chandler," he said as he walked with her across his office. "Good luck in your studies."

Tris thanked him as prettily as Sandry would have done and walked into the waiting room, and out into the hall.

_What was that about?_ she wondered.

_He just wanted to meet you_, Daja answered absently. _He said he had taught with Niko. It's not like Niko is known for taking on students. Plus, he's probably heard a bit about _you_, you know. _

Tris nodded, stopping herself when she realized that someone might see her and think it was odd. She walked from the main floor out one of the side doors. She had felt the wind on her back during her walk to the office, and didn't want to deal with images on her way back.

_I'm more worried about that vision_, Sandry continued. _Tris, please be careful._

_Aren't I always?_ Tris could feel Sandry roll her eyes and almost smiled.

-----

Veriv looked around the city as he tucked his money back into his belt purse. The wind blew his hair into his face, reminding him of what still needed to be done. He couldn't walk around the city looking like he was obviously just out of prison. He had already visited the bathhouse and had ordered some clothes. In the meantime he would have his hair cut. After that, he could find the Boar's Tusk- the inn where he was told a room was waiting for him.

As he turned to walk down the street a boy ran close by him and Veriv felt the tiniest tug on his belt. His hand shot out to grab the boy by the back of his neck.

Ignoring his protests, Veriv grabbed his stolen coins back from the boy. He pushed the thief away from him, ignoring the child's flight. Before prison, perhaps he would have punished the boy for daring to steal from him but there was no need to draw attention to himself.

Not just yet.

--------------------


	7. Classes

A/N Moonsday=Monday, Starsday=Tuesday, Airsday=Wednesday, Earthsday=Thursday, Firesday=Friday

* * *

The week passed quickly. In the mornings Tris attended magical lessons. She moved between classes with the same mage students until the names of the girls from her building, Raeg's friends, Peri's noble dorm mates, and the other students became familiar to her. In the afternoons she attended classes of her own choice with the non-mage students that attended the university. Tris enjoyed her afternoons of history, philosophy and biology almost as much as she did her morning classes of magic.

Moonsday, Starsday and Airsday had passed quickly with Tris rushing from class to class, trying not to get lost as she made her way between practical magic, theory, meditation and spell structure.

On the second to last day of the week, Earthsday, Peri arrived at Tris's room early, sitting on the redhead's bed and chatting to the other girls. They were civil with Tris, inviting her to study with them in the sitting room outside or asking if she'd like to walk to the dining hall in a group together, but Tris always refused. She had too many bad experiences in dorms before Discipline to give over her trust so soon. The only one she spent any time with was Grenda, and it was almost always in complete silence. The blonde girl followed after their dorm mates during the day, hugging her books and not saying a word.

Tris and Peri walked through the narrow pathways towards their first history class. The room was the same layout as Ravenfeather's class— a desk at one end and rising benches at the other. They chose seats and were quickly joined by Peri's dorm mates, who chattered with Peri while Tris opened a text for Theory and began to read, putting away her book only when Professor Thyme entered the class and began to speak. He was ginger-haired and had the habit of glaring at each student who arrived after his class had begun, even though he started before the clock tolled the hour.

"We'll have to get up even earlier to make sure we don't get that glare," one of the students complained as the group made their way to spell structure.

"And he gave us six texts? Six?"

"Oh, no!" This was Peri, as she looked at the study journal— a thin set of papers bound with glue at one end— she had in her hand. "I don't have my spell structure book!" She turned to her dorm mates. "Run back with me, please?"

"Peri," one of them groaned. "We'll be late!" The rest shook their heads when she looked at them.

Tris sighed, but agreed. They had enough time to get to the building where the noble girls had their rooms, even if she'd rather get to the class and read one of her texts.

Periann's room was in a small building on the south side of the student's dining hall. The door opened on the end of the building into a small study and sitting room. There was a set of stairs against the far wall. Tris and Peri climbed, Tris's hand against the wall to balance herself and her other hand bunching her skirt. They came into a narrow hallway lined with doors. Peri took a key out of her belt pouch and opened her door.

It was a small and simple room, with a window that let in rays of sun to illuminate a bed, wardrobe, desk and chair of light wood.

"It's small," Peri said awkwardly.

"Private, though," Tris said, looking around. Peri smiled sheepishly and flicked through the pile of books on her desk until she found the right one.

Tris thought about her own lack of personal space in her dorm. _The nobles need more private study time, apparently, _Tris thought, a little miffed.

_Wouldn't want their Noblenesses mingling with the common folk_, Briar said, mock-serious.

_Oh, hush. Both of you_, Sandry said. _Rosethorn warned you about how they treat the nobles differently_, Sandry sent to Tris privately.

_Same as anywhere, _Tris responded as she and Peri went back into the hallway.

"Thanks for coming with me," Peri said as she locked the door.

Tris just nodded and led the way down the stairs.

They hurried into Barrenscape's classroom before the professor began. Peri's dorm mates had only saved one seat, leaving Tris to find a seat by herself, face red. She sat quickly in an empty chair, not noticing until she had her books down that she was in the middle of Raeg's friends, Raeg himself on her left side. He grinned at her, but had no time to say anything before Professor Barrenscape began the class. Barrenscape was brisk, teaching mostly through assigning text readings while he sat at his desk and insisted on absolute silence.

There was a rush of sound as the clocks chimed noon and people rushed to collect their books. Everyone hurried to get out the door be first in line for lunch. Tris walked to the dining hall alone, getting her lunch and sitting at an empty table before opening her book and reading between bites.

To her surprise, Raeg sat down beside her a few minutes later.

"What are you doing?" Tris asked, bluntly.

"Eating lunch."

"Why here?"

Raeg studiously ignored her, eating his meat pastry at a pace that rivaled Briar. Tris watched him for a moment, shook her head, and kept reading.

"You know," Raeg said, wiping his mouth with the back of his fingers as he took a break from his pie. "You should be nicer to people."

"So I've been told."

-----

Veriv ate a meal in the inn that his still-unknown benefactor had provided. Just as he had enjoyed his first meal outside of the prison, Veriv savoured every forkful of vegetable, every chunk of bread and every cut of meat. He was still thin and pale, but the coin from his employer had paid for new clothes and a trip to the baths. With his hair cut short in Karang style, Veriv Truethought looked like any other man in the city.

He rather enjoyed being a monster among men.

Leaving coin on the table, he walked outside, feeling the chill in the night air. He could see some of the genarmed's patrols to his left and turned the opposite way. There was very little chance that they were some of the few who had been part of his capture all those years ago but he was sure that his portrait had been circulated among the patrols, even if the citizens were still unaware that he was free.

Veriv had never been certified as a mage— his name was a joke to himself— but he had mastered his magic. His curse. With time, he had managed to block the voices in his head, the unspoken thoughts of those around him— their fears, their desires, their darkest secrets. As a boy he had not known to keep these to himself and had been driven away from his home and family, abandoned on the streets of Gathai, one of Karang's larger cities, to fend for himself.

He had not only taught himself how to block the voices from his mind but he had discovered the other side of his power, the side that made him dangerous. Because the link went both ways: their voices entered his mind and he could enter theirs. Make them see what memories he wished for them to see, make them feel what terrors he wished for them to feel. And when they were so wrapped up in the horrors of their own mind, he could do what he willed.

He had found a way to take back the control that had been stolen from him as a child, helpless on the streets. He relished that control over the very minds of others.

Veriv walked the streets now, opening his barriers selectively to read the minds of those he passed. He heard the thoughts of the moment, could only delve deeper into memories with concentration. Even then he couldn't stay in the minds of another for long. Not without damaging the person beyond repair; causing brain bleeds, seizures and death.

He should know. He had been trying on people for years.

-----

The girls in Tris's room woke sluggishly, some only rolling out of bed with enough time to dress and pull their hair back before running out the door. Firesday was no different, though there was more chatter than usual. It was the last day of classes in their first week; soon they would have two glorious days to try to get caught up on readings and assignments. Not to mention the reputation Firesday nights had at the university: the mage students couldn't share in the consumption of alcohol with their non-mage counterparts but they would party nonetheless.

Tris had no intention of joining them. She would spend her evening in the quietest library she could find and then sleep, with her pillow over her ears if she had to.

Peri was running late and didn't manage to catch up with Tris until she was outside of the door leading to mediation. Peri made a face as they opened the door. They had already had two meditation classes that week and it was, easily, the most hated of their courses. Professor Clearwater was severe, impatient and rude. He expected his students to know the techniques of meditation and control and would criticize, at length, any who dared to ask a question and answer in his most condescending tones. Those who did know how to meditate were also subject to his sharp tongue. If he couldn't find an aspect of their technique that was lacking he would assure them in harsh language that they didn't know nearly as much as they assumed.

The students found him hard to cope with and Tris knew that a few of them would crack by Midwinter. None of them, however, would show their temper by unleashing the weather or showing sparks. She went deeply into mediation as soon as she could, drowning out his voice while she tended to her power and only came out of it when Peri shook her arm at the class's end.

"He scolded your form for ten minutes before he realized you couldn't hear him," Raeg laughed as they walked to Theory. He mimicked the old professor, stooping and pinching his face in anger. His friends- Tridian, Eurey and Dominik- laughed while Peri shook her head and tried not to grin.

Tris only scowled. "What's wrong with my form?" she demanded. Peri laughed at the outrage in her voice, stifling it with an effort when Tris glared at her.

"He had his spelled glass to his eye and was complaining about the level of your power," Raeg shrugged carelessly, but Tris felt her stomach clench. The amulet she and her foster siblings had created had worked perfectly so far but there was only so much it could do. Clearwater had been teaching students for years… would he notice that she wasn't what she seemed?

"Don't worry about it," Raeg said, noting her expression. "He had to find something to criticize you for. Couldn't let someone go without a harsh word, the old fart," he said, leaving the boys and Peri laughing.

Theory went quickly as the professor referenced texts and wrote with chalk on a large slate mounted on the wall. They would be learning formulas in this class, complex equations that would allow them to build spells, calculate results and use the correct amount of power.

"Ouch," Tridian moaned, holding his head, as they exited the class. They began to talk about a party their friends were attending with some upper years. Behind her Tris could hear Peri agree to a get-together with her noble friends. Tris rolled her eyes.

_If they're so worried about their schoolwork, how can they spend an entire evening doing nothing?_ she wondered.

-----

The innkeeper took a step back as Veriv entered the room in a rage, stepping back to give Veriv room to stride past, through the hall and up the stairs. He slammed the door behind him as he entered his room, looking around the small space for something to throw, something to destroy.

That morning, the innkeeper had delivered a note with breakfast. It had been simple directions to where Veriv was to meet his benefactor. Veriv had ignored the implied order the message contained. He would go because he wanted to meet the man who broke him out of his cell, not because he was told to.

In his room, Veriv paced angrily. He had gone and he had met his benefactor but it was not a stranger who had organized his escape. It was one of the two men responsible for putting him in that prison, a man who had failed to do his job, who had walked free while Veriv sat rotting in a magically enhanced cell.

Twelve years ago, Veriv had agreed to join a band of would-be thieves. They spent two years robbing the wealthiest houses in the capital. Two Lord Genarmeds were replaced in that space of time because of their inability to catch these 'fear robbers' as the people named them. Veriv's role had been simple. He would subdue everyone in the house while the rest of the crew stole what they wanted. They would walk free and he would release the house's inhabitants when everyone was out of the area.

It was only when a smart young captain decided to focus on the mage that was part of the group did the plan fall apart. As soon as Veriv was down, taken out by well-placed mages and archers on a rooftop, the rest of the group hadn't stood a chance. They were all serving twenty years in the quarries on the Janaal border, if they were still alive. They had made too many wealthy enemies to live out their sentences. Only Veriv and one of the lookouts, who was far enough away from the house that he didn't get picked up, escaped that fate.

Now that lookout, the one who didn't spot the mages and who had run away rather than help his comrades, wanted Veriv to help him. He wanted to hire the mage with money he had made while Veriv was locked away. He wanted Veriv's talent put to use on another crime spree— more ambitious than the last— that he had cooked up while Veriv had sat in a cell for ten years. Veriv had been placed in a prison, to rot there for his part. He had been far too dangerous to ever be let free.

Veriv calmed his pacing, smiling a little at that thought. He _was_ dangerous, he knew that. Even more so now, when he was willing to do anything to keep his freedom. They should have executed him, as some of the judges had suggested. Then the lookout wouldn't have been able to escape the arrests and break Veriv out of prison. After his revenge on the other man responsible for his incarceration was complete, the ex-lookout wouldn't be able to demand anything of him. He wouldn't be able to demand anything of anybody.

He was supposed to have been watching for threats like mages, after all. And ten years is a very long time.


	8. A New Perspective

Just as Tris knew it would, the next day started off with bright skies, cool weather, and sick students. The girls in her dormitory hadn't drank any alcohol and therefore weren't going to get the headaches and nausea that Tris suspected most of the students on campus were suffering from, but even they had not returned to bed until an hour before dawn. Tris and Grenda, the small blonde girl from Namorn that had the bed beside Tris's, had been the only two to stay in and had studied together in silence; listening to the shrieks, yells, bursts of song, and sounds of running feet that been carried in through the open window. She had heard that the students at the universities were allowed to run wild but hadn't really believed it until the fifth time she was woken up by a crash or shriek or yell.

Tris rose early as usual and was extra careful not to wake the other girls. Several of them had proven to be as cranky as Tris when woken early and she couldn't imagine their late night making their morning moods any sweeter. She pulled on a light wool dress and her leather slippers and tiptoed into the common room and down the stairs. Tris walked alone to the dining hall for breakfast. There was evidence of last night's craziness in some trampled shrubbery, shattered glasses and what looked like shredded school notes but the campus was now eerily silent.

There were only two other students awake for the meal when the hall was usually packed so the staff who ran the dining hall talked leisurely, serving her with smiles. A few of them had come to recognize Tris since she was always there before the breakfast crowds and she chatted with them for a few minutes. She had always enjoyed the company of kitchen staff. They never cared about the rumours of strangeness as long as the person could sit quietly and relieve some of their workload.

Tris took a few rolls and a napkin to wrap them in and left, looking around the empty campus with a satisfied sigh. There was no better time to get to know the place as when there was no one else around to distract her. She only wished there was somewhere she could go to really feel the wind— the buildings blocked all but the tiniest fragments of it. The wall was too exposed for her to have any privacy…

_Maybe some of these tall buildings will be open_, Tris thought, looking around. She missed the open air.

Wandering through the campus and trying to open doors of suitably tall buildings as inauspiciously as possible, Tris found a few unlocked but none of them had doorways onto the roofs. She supposed they wouldn't have much use for the roofs when they'd be covered in snow for almost half the year.

After almost an hour, she tried her fifth unlocked building. She climbed to the top floor where, with delight, she found a trapdoor that led onto the roof. Climbing the stairs, she stepped out into the sunlight, shut the door behind her and found a place to sit. There was almost no view from where she sat, hidden behind a rise in the roof, but the wind reached her just fine.

She let her barriers drop and watched and listened to what came on the light breeze. The wind played around her, not used to her presence since she was so careful to not work with them while she was pretending to be Siri.

The city was already awake. Unlike the university students, the city's citizens had to go about their daily business as usual. They didn't have markets like the warmer places Tris had visited, instead people walked in and out of shops picking up food for the day. A group of children played in the street. A flock of geese flew over the city, heading south. Cold weather was coming soon along with some rains, she saw when she rode the air currents into oncoming weather.

_It won't be too long before it starts to snow_, she thought with a sigh when she returned to her body as the clock called the noon hour. She hated being cold.

She got up stiffly and left the building as she had found it. Pausing outside the door, she considered what to do with the rest of her morning. She had told Peri she would stop by to have lunch together, she remembered. She considered going to a library instead but found herself actually wanting Peri's company.

It wasn't odd that she wanted company. She may be a solitary girl, but that didn't mean she didn't enjoy having people around her. Usually she ignored the twinges of loneliness and chose to be alone in spite of them. It was safer that way. She wondered why she was giving up that security, as lonely as it could be, for Periann's company.

_Maybe I'm tired of being alone, _she thought._ Isn't that one of the main reasons I wanted my Lightsbridge credential? I can go on about making a living if I like but I know the idea of studying here came to me after the first boy I met while I was travelling with Niko shied away from me once he learned my name. _She wanted to ignore the voice that she knew was right so she headed towards the dorm for the noble girls.

Walking past the dining hall, she was surprised to see that it was still almost empty. _Well, really_, she thought disdainfully. _They don't need that much time to get over themselves. _

_You've obviously forgotten the first time we got into alcohol_, Briar thought.

_The _only_ time_, Sandry corrected with a mental shudder.

_Do you see any burnt buildings around here?_ Tris asked. _No. So they can't possibly have an excuse to spend the day in bed. We were up and working the next day far before noon._

_If they had Rosethorn waking them up the next morning, they'd be up and working too_, Briar reminded her.

Tris conceded that point as Sandry laughed.

While Tris was talking to her siblings she had walked through the campus towards Peri's dorm and she opened the door to the common room as the conversation faded. She didn't notice until she was already inside that the six girls sitting in the small room were staring at her with scornful expressions. Tris felt her gaze get frosty as she met their looks straight on. She walked through the room towards the staircase, but one of the girls got up to block her way. Tris recognized her from her morning classes, Rachil ei Sacrie. They had never spoken to each other and had only sat together once: the first dinner when Tris had been introduced to Raeg. After that, Peri had either sat at another table with these girls and the nobles from the other dorms, or she had joined Tris or her brother and hadn't forced the two groups together again.

Tris raised her eyebrows as her temper spiked. They thought they could intimidate her? She twitched, wanting to bring her hand up to her braids for a second before dropping it back to her side ruefully. She wasn't in the habit of solving her problems with her magic, but it was always a temptation to send arrogant people like this running with lightning at their behinds. Briar snorted at the mental image she projected.

"What do you want, merchant?" Rachil asked, the 'merchant' clearly meant to be an insult. Tris almost rolled her eyes. Weren't they ever imaginative? Next it would be her nose, she'd bet a silver astrel on it.

_I'll take that bet_, Briar said. _This one won't get past the merchant comments. Don't you wish you had taken my suggestion and picked a different last name? I mean, you had the choice of anything and you picked another merchant class name? Don't you have any sense of adventure?_

_For someone who gets into the kind of trouble you do, Briar, you have the strangest sense of what constitutes an adventure,_ Tris replied. Out loud, she said "I'm here to visit Periann. Move, if you please."

"You do not belong in here. This is quarters for nobles, not for your class." Rachil replied. There were generic twitters from the other girls and Tris did roll her eyes. Did they have no minds of their own?

_Nope_, Briar said. _And it looks like you owe me that astrel._

"Turn around and follow that long nose out the door, _if you please_." Rachil continued.

_Ha_, Tris said to Briar. She had known about the length of her nose for years, it was no longer a cause of any hurt pride but the attitude of the girls _was_ annoying. Tris looked to her right and saw the girl she insulted the first night, Darielle, smirking at her from her group of friends. She felt her anger rise.

_Enough of this_, Tris thought. _I'm not losing my temper over these _kaqs.

She was turning to leave when Peri walked down the steps, looking as irritated as Tris had ever seen her. She walked to the redhead and grabbed her elbow.

"Let's go," she mumbled, walking towards the door.

"I thought you were coming with us into town today, Periann?" Rachil called in a tauntingly sweet voice. "You're not going to give up our company for a merchant's?"

"I'll be otherwise engaged today," Periann said, frowning. "Go into town without me." She turned her back on the girl and walked out before Rachil could respond, dragging Tris with her.

As soon as they were outside Tris tugged her elbow back, glaring at the other girl. Periann's face was red and she bit her lip when she saw that Tris was annoyed.

"Why did you do that?" Tris asked angrily. She was still embarrassed by those stupid girls and she knew she was taking it out on Peri but she didn't care. Being embarrassed had always made her mad at everyone.

"I'm not even really a noble," Peri muttered, ignoring the question. "My family may be invited to court, but we're not old blood and they never let me forget it."

"You seemed fine with them before today," Tris snapped. "Why make them angry?"

"I like your company better."

"Why?"

"You don't play games. You don't gossip. I don't have to watch what I say and do around you so that I don't get made fun of or get talked about later. You're never petty about being mean," Tris made a face. "You know how they are with their power games. You don't do that. You aren't all sugar and spices but you're clear about what annoys you and I don't have to tiptoe around you like I do them. They're petty gossipers and I don't want anything to do with them when I could be your friend instead."

Tris was blushing too, now, her anger ebbing but she responded dryly. "So, I'm better than petty gossips, is all?"

"I didn't mean _that_!"

Tris smiled, cutting Peri off. "I was joking."

"Really?"

"It does happen occasionally," Tris griped, making Peri laugh.

------

Veriv thought about his time in prison too often.

He hadn't left his room in the inn again after that meeting. His new… employer… had summoned him, but after the messenger hadn't returned he hadn't made any other attempts to call Veriv to heel.

Veriv looked over at the messenger's dead body, crumpled in the corner. He really should get rid of that soon.

Ten years in prison had given him a lot of time to think on who was responsible for his lost time. He had decided on two names, two men who were free and successful while he grew weak and ill (_and possibly insane_, he thought some nights but he always shoved it to the back of his mind) in that jail.

He had always enjoyed riches… But they could wait until his revenge was complete. He just had to find the best way to begin. He knew about loss and fear… It was time the men who had taken _everything_ from him learned about them too.


	9. Corner Haunts

A/N Snow Moon= November  
Watersday=Saturday

* * *

Veriv had decided how he would work on his revenge. The failed watchman, his would-be employer, was easy. It was just a matter of fear. He spent the autumn haunting him, following him from home to the bar to his 'secret' workplace. He watched from an alley across the street as hired goons broke into his room in the inn, smiling slightly at the thought of what they'd find. His employer was frightened that Veriv had seemingly vanished because he had to know it wouldn't be for long; like one of the mountain cats who could hide mere feet away, waiting for the perfect moment to attack. Veriv memorized the faces of the ex-lookout's family, his goons, and his friends. They would be important, as one by one they would be picked off.

The other man responsible for his fall was much more than a two-bit thief and had to be dealt with accordingly. He had gained much from Veriv's fall and Veriv knew that unless he lost everything, there would be no balance.

And so he stalked and he planned and it finally came to him.

-----

The teachers of Lightsbridge worked their students hard. Between the five day workweek and the amount of homework they were expected to finish in their 'free' time, the partying and general good mood of the student body quickly dropped. It was only when Sandry, Briar and Daja spoke of the rains in Summersea that Tris finally noticed the icing of frost on the windows and roofs of the school and realized it was already into Snow Moon.

Peri and Tris had become much closer over the months, sitting together in all their classes and spending time in Tris's common room studying with the other girls. Peri always sat with Tris or her brother instead of splitting her time between them and Rachil and the other girls. Tris suspected that Peri was getting a hard time from her dormmates about her choice of friends, but Peri never complained so she didn't bring it up.

One Watersday morning, Tris went through her usual blurry-eyed routine, sneaking out of the dorm in her stockings, preferring to freeze her feet with the walk into the common room than to wake the other girls with the clunking of her hard-soled boots on the stone. Tris sat on the worn-out chair, slipped on her spectacles and tried to tug the boots on her feet, scowling at the difficulty. They were the only part of her wardrobe that Tris had bought rather than have Sandry make and Tris hated the struggle, especially in the mornings when her body seemed determined to disobey her. Finally getting the leather in place, she grabbed her hooded coat and walked down the steeply spiraled staircase.

Tris grimaced as she looked out the window for the first time and saw that it had lightly snowed through the night. She had not enjoyed the other snowfalls. Peri had promised that it got better than the light dusting that turned everything to mud or puddles by noon but Tris didn't believe her. She couldn't see the joy in winter. She was always red-faced and sweating by the time she got down the stairs of her dorm, as bundled up as she had to be, and yet as soon as she was outside everything was cold— even the inside of her nose when she breathed. Entering a room after being in the cold was hardly a relief when the clothes were immediately a burden and she was blinded as her spectacles fogged up.

_Just_ _wait until you're in the middle of a blizzard!_ Daja said wickedly.

_Thanks ever so much_, Tris replied.

Tris walked into the common room, pausing when she heard voices in the courtyard outside. The first weekend had proved to be the rule rather than an exception, even as the partying died down. The students here were not known for their willingness to be up with the sun. She was used to being the only one up any time before noon on a Watersday, taking her time in the dining hall and even helping the kitchen staff when she had no work to do. She listened for a moment, scratching her head absentmindedly. She had been itchy since the week before. At first she thought it was just the dry winter air and the fact that it was too time-consuming to brush her hair as often as she'd like, but she had the lingering suspicion that it had much more to do with the fact that she was having to store her excess power rather than use it. She tried to think back to the last time she had done any weather magic.

Pushing open the wooden doors, she was distracted from her musings by a bright light. Tris blinked, startled by the unusual brightness and the biting cold. She heard a laugh and then something exploded wetly on the stone beside her head and she was splattered with bits of snow.

"Aw," she heard Periann giggle. "You missed!"

Tris blinked and the world came into focus, blanketed in a layer of snow that the early morning sun hit and sparkled off of, magnifying the light. Looking at her 'attackers' Tris saw Periann huddled in her expensively warm clothes— a bright red coat lined with dark fur on the collar and cuffs— blowing warm air on her hands and grinning at Tris. Two of Raeg's friends, Tridian and Eurey, were packing snow into balls. Raeg's hands were suspiciously empty.

Tris raised one golden eyebrow at him but gave up her irritation when he just laughed at her.

"Are you coming, then?" one of the friends asked Periann as he dropped the snowball and shoved his hands in his pockets.

Periann scrambled over to Tris. "They're going off campus, into the city. I know we were going to work on Theory but do you want to go for a bit?"

Tris hesitated, thinking of all the assignments she was supposed to be working on. However, she hadn't seen the city since she and Niko had stayed there before classes, and she had been too nervous to do much wandering then. She_ had_ been hoping for a chance to come up soon.

Periann jumped and squeaked when Tris agreed that they should join the boys. They followed the boys across the grounds, ignoring all their indoor shortcuts to stay in the new snow. Eurey pushed Tridian into a snowbank as they walked passed their Meditation class, sparking a snowball fight that lasted until they reached the entrance hall, and the girls fell far behind so they would not be drawn into it as casualties of a stray snowball.

Finally, they reached the main entrance hall. They walked into the quiet building, their squeaky footsteps echoing in the wide room. Tris craned her next to look up at the craftsmanship of the high ceiling. Deeply carved were two dragons, chasing each other around the length of the hall forever, trapped in stone. The light coming through the wide doors wasn't ever enough to bathe them in sunlight so there were hovering mage-lights that lit them, causing shadows that made them seem almost alive. Their group was across the hall quickly and she looked away from the carvings only when they stepped outside and the ceiling was blocked from her view.

The courtyard that separated the hall from the gates was empty and they crossed it quickly, going through the open gates. They were never locked.

The streets were mush; footsteps, hooves and wheels had walked the snow into grey slush. People skirted puddles and cursed when they were splashed by a passing cart or running children.

Periann and Tris were slower than Raeg and his friends and had almost caught up with the three boys on a street corner where Raeg seemed to be arguing with the others. Although they were too far away to hear the words, the wind was blowing in the right direction. Without thinking about it, Tris focused in on the voices.

"- we have girls with us! I'm not taking my sister to _that_ tavern!" Raeg's annoyed voice drifted to Tris's ears.

"They're just dancers," Tridian said and Raeg's glare told Tris exactly what kind of dancers they were.

"No need for them to come. Just let them shop for a while and we'll fetch them afterwards," Eurey said.

"Leave two defenseless girls in the streets. Alone. Are you out of your ble-"

"Raeg? What are we doing?" Periann yelled ahead to her brother, just noticing the halt in their progress.

He glared at the other boys for a minute before turning to his sister and Tris. "We're going to look at those shops you always talk about going to with Hannae. We'll meet up with the guys later." His friends wished them farewell which Raeg and Tris ignored and Periann answered cheerfully. Tris kept her face polite, pretending that she, like Periann, was oblivious to everything around her and had noticed nothing strange in the change of plans

"Come on, then, girls," Raeg said sharply, the formerly bright smile disappeared from his face. Periann hooked her arm through her brother's.

They walked along the street with Tris beside them for a moment before Periann drawled, with a mock-aristocratic air, "Oh, dear Brother Mine, I'm so glad you stayed to save us innocent females from the filth of the streets. Whatever would we do without you?"

Tris smiled. Maybe Periann wasn't quite as oblivious as she had thought.

"Don't be a pest, Peri," Raeg answered, a smile in his voice again. Periann just grinned and skipped ahead, leaving Tris and Raeg alone in an awkward silence. After a moment, Raeg looked over. When Tris met his eyes he opened his mouth to start a conversation.

Instead, Periann's voice echoed down the street. "Here it is! Hurry up, you two! Why are you dallying?"

Tris and Raeg hurried toward Periann, the topic of conversation forgotten.

-----

An unoccupied corner had become his haunt and he watched the target. He wrinkled his nose in distaste when she stayed with the couple. The three of them entered a shop and Veriv readied himself for the cold wait. It was only a matter of time. Time had always been his enemy, inside the prison walls. Now he wanted to use every last minute of it for himself. But first, he had to have his revenge.

He would act soon.

-----

Tris had never been an enthusiastic shopper, but between Peri's excitement and Raeg's good-natured ribbing she managed to have a good time. From the shops they ended up in an indoor marketplace where people rented temporary stalls to sell goods. The items there were much more reasonably priced and Tris and Raeg, both of whom were more frugal than Periann, finally found something to buy. Peri had wandered a little as they looked at a stall with cheap winter clothes— fur lined mittens and long scarves. They chatted about Professor Ravenfeather's newest project and how purple Professor Clearwater's face had gotten when he had yelled at the class the day before. Peri joined in at this moment to say that she had actually been worried about his health.

"I wasn't," Tris and Raeg replied together.

"He's obviously miserable!" Raeg explained when Peri looked disapprovingly at them. "Maybe if he gets sick he'll get to stop teaching."

"He annoys me," was Tris's reasoning, which made Peri roll her eyes and Raeg laugh.

Both Peri and Raeg wandered as she looked at books until Raeg's friends found them again and they all walked together back to the school. Raeg was still angry at his friends so he and Tris lagged behind as Peri chatted with them.

The breeze had picked up, distracting Tris with images of bartering, conversations and movement through the city. Raeg walked with her in silence until they reached the campus.

"You know, you can hang out with me and my friends even if Peri isn't there," he said as they were about to part ways to their separate dorms. Tris looked at him and didn't respond, trying to make sure he didn't have any joke or sarcasm ready.

"You know, if you… want…to…." He trailed off in the face of her silence.

"Thank you," Tris said. They looked at each other awkwardly for a moment before Tris turned on her heel to walk away towards her room.

"You're welcome!" Raeg called after her.


	10. Of Magic, Voices, and Threats

Professor Ravenfeather's classes had been continuing with debates and discussions before they could start to actually work with magic. Ravenfeather had explained that it was up to their control teacher to determine when they were ready to start building their magic, but Tris thought it might be something more than that. Some of the answers had worried her in their discussions on ethics and power. Raeg had become the strongest speaker in the class, his points of view firmly held and defended against others who disagreed with him.

After that first day when the professor had startled a reply out of her, Tris had kept her opinions to herself. _If I don't agree or disagree_, she reasoned. _There will be no reason for anyone to get annoyed with me._

The day after their trip into the city, Tris sat with a book on her lap, reading as the rest of the students filtered into the class. She had had a horrible night: one of her dorm mates had come down with a winter cold, and had kept the rest of the girls up for hours with her hacking. Tris, a light sleeper, had spent most of the night awake listening to the coughs from the other bed. The result was a red-headed thundercloud, ready to take out anyone who crossed her. Luckily, Periann had taken one look at her expression and had sat two seats down with the girls from Tris's dorm.

Raeg and his friends walked in the class with a blast of cold air that brought a vision of kissing students, huddled in a hollow out of the snow. Tris wrinkled her nose and shook her head, clearing it from her mind, and focused on the page. Four sets of legs walked past her, but one, instead, thumped down in the seat on her right. She didn't look up.

"What are you reading?" Raeg's voice asked close to her ear.

"It's none of your concern," Tris answered waspishly, jerking her head away from his breath on her cheek.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm the one who's reading it, not you."

"Now, that's just a silly reason for it not to be my concern. What if, by happenstance, we switch packs and I'm stuck reading it? Or what if you decide to leave it behind, how am I going to return a book to you if I don't know its title? Or what if I decide to court you? How can I gain your affections if we can't discuss current literature?"

Tris threw him a sharp sidelong glance and huffed at the familiar, teasing grin on his face. She continued to read, reasoning that if she just ignored him he would go away.

When he knelt on the ground at her knees, tilting his head to the side to try and read the book's cover, she decided that whoever had come up with that strategy was bleat-brained, plain and simple.

"What are you doing?" Tris asked, closing the book with a snap.

Before Raeg could answer, Professor Ravenfeather walked in with a bang of his office door. "Good morning, fresh young minds, I hope you are all ready for some stimulation. Wake up, Tridian! Raeg, young sir, I am sure Siriana is not taking kindly to your proposal of marriage, so pick yourself off the floor with a bit of dignity and return to your friends. Comfort him there, boys," he directed at Raeg's group, "there's some nice lads." Raeg rose with a slightly embarrassed grin, and with a wink to Tris he crossed the room to his catcalling friends. Tris stared straight ahead, feeling her face grow warm with her blush.

_Don't take him seriously_, she scolded herself_, He teases all the girls the_

_same way. And it's all just to get attention_, she thought, recalling the awkward silences that often cropped up when they were alone. _He only acts this way when others are around, so he cannot be serious about it. _

_Not that I would want him to be serious about it!_

"Today, we will start on the practical use of magic." Ravenfeather flapped his hands at them when the class cheered. "Yes, I know. My theory's not good enough for you."

"It's been months of theory!" Raeg shouted out. "What did you expect?"

"I expect exactly what I've gotten. A group of ungrateful, monstrous students." The class cheered and laughed. "But since your Meditation professor has told me it's past time I do my job." Tris frowned at the bitterness she thought she heard in his voice, but his smile contradicted what she thought she had heard. "We will start with simple spells, working in pairs. Now hook up with a class mate and sit down silently, if you lot can handle that."

"So, Siri. What are you reading?" Raeg asked, a smile in his voice as he stood over her. She glared at him: she had put her book away when Professor Ravenfeather had started talking.

"Want to be my partner?" he asked. Tris shot a glare at Peri, who ignored her and pretended to be listening closely to what her partner had to say. Peri hated dealing with her brother when he was in a teasing mood, and had apparently pawned him off on Tris. "I have an even number of friends, and apparently I'm the least liked," he continued, looking over at his four friends, seated in their usual seats together.

"You wonder why?" Tris muttered, relaxed by the teasing that reminded her of her foster brother. He had never been able to pass up a chance to push her buttons, either.

Raeg laughed. "A joke? An actual joke, Siri? I'm thrilled and honoured, even if it was at my expense. Now we have to be partners, so I can wrestle another one out of you." He looked at her in mock dismay when she just gave him a cold stare. "This may be harder than I thought…" he murmured, intending for her to hear. She ignored him, trying to quench the flustered feeling she was getting from his attention.

_Concentrate on the lesson_, she told herself, _He is just doing this to get a rise out of you._

-----

After another fifteen minutes Tris was ready to strangle him, if it hadn't meant being arrested and all sorts of unpleasantness that would come with that. Also, she was pretty sure Periann was the only friend she had, outside her family group, and that friendships didn't often survive when one friend killed the other's brother.

Not that she was an expert on the matter of friends.

The lesson was easy enough, in her eyes. All academic mages could move things, usually by the time they were children, and this exercise was to refine that talent. Many groups had already graduated from the lifting of a wooden block, to moving an egg from one basket to another, Raeg and Tris included. Raeg, however, was arguing that throwing the egg would provide much more entertainment than simply moving it gently. No matter how many times Tris repeated the lesson, Raeg was insistent that his friend would enjoy egg in his hair.

"No, really!" he insisted, his face straight, "He would find that sort of thing very funny, especially since he's been showing off for that group of girls for a month."

"Raeg—" Tris started, her hands cupped over the egg, to prevent any 'accidents'.

Raeg tried to peel her hand off of the egg resulting in a short, silent fight that stopped just short of Tris kicking his shins. Instead, Raeg laughed, leaned forward and slapped his hands on top of hers, crushing the egg underneath her palms. With mucous slime sticking to her hands, Tris glared at the boy, who leaned back again, laughing uproariously at his prank. Tris shook her head at his amusement. She had to admit— No! It wasn't funny. Not even a little.

Getting up to fetch another egg from Professor Ravenfeather, Tris trailed her slimy hand along the back of Raeg's neck. He shouted and cursed as he tried to wipe off the disgusting gunk that was left just below his hairline. Without looking back, Tris smirked and continued her walk up to Ravenfeather's desk.

Passing in front of the glass cabinet that held a number of Ravenfeather's magical workings, Tris felt the air to her right, along the bleachers, expand and thrust out, with an uncontrolled magical working. One of the student's power had gotten away from him, a quiet boy who was always being yelled at by Clearwater in control.

Tris saw the spell coming. Time seemed to slow; her first response lasted a millisecond and seemed like hours, as she went to raise the shields that she had been praised for. The magic had enough strength to cause her some damage, but was nowhere near as strong as that which had been tested against her shields.

_It will ruin everything_, she thought, freezing. _Everyone will know I'm different. I will have to leave Lightsbridge. I will never even get the chance to pretend to be normal._

Thinking of her future, of a normal life and of independence. Thinking of Periann's quiet, unfounded admiration and Raeg's teasing, Tris deliberately stopped her shield's formation, leaving herself defenseless against the blazing magic speeding toward her. She closed her eyes.

Time regained its normal speed and Tris felt the contact as the magic hit her. She flew back, hitting the cabinet with a crash and falling to the ground with shattering glass.

She heard Raeg's shout, Peri's scream, and her three siblings were suddenly inside her head, feeling the contact. Tris's felt someone turn her over as Ravenfeather called her name.

_Don't worry, I'm okay_, she reassured her anxious siblings. She didn't have enough time to do the same for Raeg or Peri before she passed out.

-----

She saw a strange room when she woke up and she was confused. It had taken her the better part of the two months since she had arrived at Lightsbridge to stop expecting to see her room in Summersea. Now, she had no idea where she was supposed to be.

Sitting up stiffly— she hurt!— Tris squinted around the blurry room. She had spent enough time in healers' rooms to know what one looked like, although she hadn't expected to find herself in one, at least not here.

Even more unexpected was who was sitting in the chair set beside her bed. Raeg looked as though he had been there for hours, judging by the awkward way he had fallen asleep sitting up, his head leaning forward onto his chest. Tris just looked at him, confused as to why he would sleep there in that uncomfortable position. Since there was no light shining through the windows, Tris knew she had been there for at least seven hours. As if her stare had awakened him, Raeg opened his eyes and looked around, as confused as Tris had been. Seeming to remember where he was, he snapped his gaze over to Tris, wincing at the pain in his stiff neck.

"Hey!" he said, smiling at her. "You're awake!" He handed her her spectacles, which he had been holding in his lap. Tris thanked him and slipped them on, looking around the room instead of at her companion.

"What—?" Tris started, unsure of how to finish the question.

"What happened?" Raeg supplied, and Tris nodded, although she would have been just as happy if he had said 'What am I doing here?' instead.

"That idiot Dudlass hasn't been practicing control. Instead of telling Professor Clearwater that he wasn't getting it, he just kept pretending, until it all came out in class today." His lips tightened. "He confessed after he threw you across the room, and I have to say no one took too kindly to it. Professor Ravenfeather said he wasn't allowed back until Clearwater actually looked into his progress, instead of 'ignoring him, like he had done with all his other students.'" Raeg grinned as he mimicked Ravenfeather's way of talking. "I get the feeling Clearwater and Ravenfeather don't get along that well." Tris smiled along with him at that obvious statement, but stopped when a flash of pain in her cheek caused her to clap her hand to her face. "You hit your face off the cabinet," Raeg explained. "You have a nice bruise, but the healers say nothing is broken." He took her cupped hand away and brushed his fingers along her cheekbone, seemingly making sure they missed nothing, although he had no healer's training. Before an awkward silence could develop, the door across from Tris's bed opened. A pudgy, but exceedingly tall, man was revealed, dressed in a Temple Healer's garb.

He smiled at Tris. "Welcome to the world of the living!" he joked, his voice higher than one would expect from someone his size. "It's about time! You had this poor boy worried." Raeg blushed and looked away, not answering the healer's taunt.

"There, now, Raeg," the huge man continued, "she's awake and well, just as I promised. Can you now get out of the way so I can do my job?" Raeg said a quick, embarrassed good-bye and left the room, looking over his shoulder at Tris once before he shut the door.

The healer chuckled, but when he sat down beside her bed his good humour had faded. "Miss Farash, we tried to do a healing on you but your body is much more resistant than we would have thought in one your age. Since you'll have no more than some bruising after this, I would prefer not to build up your resistance to healing any further. Yes?" Tris nodded her agreement.

"Good." He paused, as if waiting for Tris to explain where she had built up such a resistance to healing. Not wanting to even try to explain about a stubborn Empress, a great mage's curse and Namorn staircases, Tris kept silent. When the healer saw that she wouldn't tell him he continued on his own. "I want you to stay here for the night, just because you did hit your head rather hard, I've been told. Tomorrow, if everything goes well, you will be back at classes again." The healer left her alone in the room with the promise that he would return with a non-magical pain reliever in a few minutes.

_What were you thinking, Tris?_ Sandry's voice seemed to cut through the silence, even though it was only in her head. _Why didn't you raise your shield?_

_That would have gone over well!_ Tris replied, sarcastically._ 'Of course, can't you all raise shields of lightning? Well, yes you can, you just haven't tried!' Come on, Sandry! I have to protect my identity._

_At what cost?_ Briar asked, his concern showing in anger, as it always did.

Sandry continued. _If I had known you would become self-destructive, I never would have let—_

_What, Sandry?_ Tris asked, her temper fraying. _You never would have let me come? That is your choice now, what I do with my life? I want this! So just back off and let me do it my way!_

She blocked Sandry, and Briar for good measure, from her mind. After a moment she felt guilty, she always did when she yelled at her sister. _But what right does she have to judge my decisions?_

_She's just worried about you_, saati, Daja's concern, quiet and unobtrusive, filtered into Tris's mind. _We hate being so far away when you may need our help._

_I_ am _fine_. Tris assured her.

_I know. And so do they, when they aren't worried out of their minds. Sleep now, Tris. You'll need it, if you keep getting yourself into this kind of trouble._

_Goodnight_, _Daja._ _Thank you for trusting in me._

-----

The pain medications wore off in the middle of the night, and Tris lay awake with a throbbing in her cheek and arm that wouldn't let her drift off again. Waiting for a healer to come through to check on her, Tris reached up and opened the window above her bed, letting in the cold night air.

The voice carried on the wind was instantly recognizable, she had listened to it six days a week for the past two months. "I told you they weren't ready!" Ravenfeather's voice snapped, sharper than Tris had ever heard it. "And yet I was forced into teaching them practical magic. Now look at what happened!"

"They have sufficient control," a wheezy voice replied. Professor Clearwater, who taught meditation and control theory, was someone who Tris had never liked. "You must not have been paying attention to the lesson, which goes to show what happens when a tinkering fool who just wants to play with toys is asked to teach practical magic."

"I am a magical artifacts expert, they are not my _toys_," Ravenfeather replied hotly. "And how dare you suggest that I am not capable of leading my stu—"

"Enough." This voice Tris was also familiar with, the Lightsbridge headmaster. "You disgrace yourselves with your bickering. The student is fine; I'm positive about that. Since there was no lasting harm done, the only—"

The wind changed direction and cut off the voices, leaving Tris alone in the dark once more.

-----

As promised, Tris was allowed to return to classes the next day. With a paste on her cheek to ease the pain of the bruise, Tris walked from the infirmary to her dorm. As soon as she entered the long room, she was attacked by a squealing mass of brown hair in a copper-red overcoat.

"Siri! Are you okay? What was it like? You were probably frightened! I'm so sorry I couldn't come visit you, but they wouldn't let in any visitors. Raeg just refused to leave so you weren't alone, which is good. Right? Was he any company at all?"

Tris braced her hands on Periann's shoulders, pushing her back gently. Periann's enthusiastic concern made her laugh for the first time since she had left home.

"I'm fine. The student is barred from that class until he learns control, and Raeg… he was well-behaved, anyway." Periann snorted at the idea of her brother being well-behaved.

"Do you need any help getting to class?"

"It's my face, not my legs!"

Periann grinned again, and gave Tris a quick hug. She broke apart and walked slowly with Tris to class, switching rapidly between gossip and asking about Tris's injuries.

They walked into class and Tris ignored the other students, who offered smiles or shouted jokes when she walked in. Professor Ravenfeather looked up, but instead of a smile or pun, he frowned, looking Tris over. Tris took her seat without looking at him again. What was going on?

The class passed by without any excitement. Ravenfeather used the incident to prompt a class on power buildup and release, and how to prevent the accident that had happened the day before. Tris caught him examining her more than once.

When class was over, Tris tried to get out before he could catch her attention, but he was a step ahead. "Siriana, can I speak to you for a moment?" he called over the noise of students packing up to leave.

Tris waited in front of his desk until all the students had filtered from the room. Only then did he look up at her, his face unusually grave.

"I'm an artifacts expert, Siriana. I deal with ways to put power in objects," Tris nodded, confused as to what he was trying to say. "I have never seen such a powerful working on a student before," he said, gesturing at the amulet hidden beneath her shirt. She felt shock rush through her, and she tried to keep her expression neutral. She didn't succeed, and Ravenfeather watched her closely. "Now, I cannot make you tell me about it, but you know how suspicious it looks if you don't."

Tris looked up from the desktop, meeting his eyes in the frozen stare her siblings hated so much. "Does that mean I'm dismissed?" she asked. He nodded reluctantly, and she walked across the room, towards the door.

"I will make sure nothing happens to my students, Miss Farash," he called to her as she opened the door. "If I think you have become a threat to them, I will deal with you."

Tris ignored him and walked out into the sun and the snow. She let the door slam behind her.


	11. The Power of Memories

The nights were frigid. Veriv didn't want to be seen around the inn he was staying at too often— he didn't know who would recognize him—but since he couldn't stay on the streets all day and night in the rapidly falling temperatures, Veriv took shelter in a cheap bar ion the poorest neighbourhood of the city while the target lay sleeping, safe in her dormitory. The threatening atmosphere didn't worry him. It had been many years since he had felt fear.

It had been many years since he had felt anything.

The problem with Veriv Truethought was never that he _wanted_ to do others harm, but that he didn't care if he did. Many would say that someone who wants to hurt another, that intentionally causes someone pain and misery, is the worse person. However, there is a certain type of evil that is bred within someone that serves only himself. People like this have no rationale behind their actions except their own desires. They won't necessarily act against those they are angry with or hate or fear, but against any who are in the way of what they want. And when looking into the eyes of someone who is bound to kill you, it is more reassuring to see hate than to see nothing at all.

Veriv looked around the bar and remembered a similar scene, before prison and the crimes that had landed him there. Before a trumped-up lookout had freed him, and made him pay for that freedom.

_He had owned nothing. That drew no attention in a city as large as the one he found himself in, the summer of his twentieth year. For someone who had never been able to fade into the crowd, not being noticed was a blessing in itself. However his magic, his curse, would not allow him to stay unnoticed for long._

_The bar fight would have occurred whether Veriv was there or if he had chosen a different haunt that night. Drunken tempers had run too high for the cheap food to placate. The ending of the fight, though, Veriv's part in that would determine how the rest of his life, and many others' lives, would play out._

_The bar was dimly lit, more to hide the cheap food and services than the surroundings, although the lighting did serve to make it seem slightly less decrepit than it was. Stained, nearly broken, tables dotted the room, leaning precariously either from misshapen legs or lumps in the floorboards. The bar itself had the feel of cobblestones, so many patrons had carved upon its surface with their knives; devotions of love, hate and mere existence for the world to see. The employees were scantily clad women, too old for nights on the streets, or resident tough-men who made sure that items sold were items paid for, no matter what they had to do to collect the money._

_Veriv walked in after midnight, bringing with him a wave of icy air that caused the patrons nearest the door to soundly curse him and hunch further into their beers. Veriv didn't bother to respond. Instead, he slipped into the darkness and the noise and the overwhelming monotony of the room. The drink had long become all-important for many of the customers in a bar like this. The air of angry hopelessness would hide anyone in its tempting depths._

_Veriv had barely sat at the bar when the trouble started. He couldn't remember, if he had ever known, the reason for the fight. One drunk punching another hardly needed a reason._

_Quite suddenly the bar had turned into a brawl, everyone either part of the fight, or trying to get out of the bar. All of the women, keen at picking up on these episodes, had fled to the back rooms while the men piled into the brawlers, trying to subdue the fight before it damaged the property. This further incited the other drunks who rose to help their fellow patrons, although they, more often than not, would end up punching those same comrades._

_Veriv surveyed the scene. He had chosen to sit at the furthest end of the bar, the seething yelling mass of people blocking his escape into the night air. Gulping down the rest of his drink, he stood to get out of the way before he was pulled into the fight. _

_His attacker was a dark-haired man, smaller than most of the brawlers but with a distinct advantage over Veriv. Raising his fist, the man made the error of looking into Veriv's dark eyes. He froze for a moment before his scream echoed through the bar, halting every man there cold._

Veriv nodded when the bartender offered him another beer. He shouldn't be drinking; it made his power less controllable but after years of almost constant meditation, and months outside in steadily declining temperatures, he was willing to take the risk.

The bartender quickly moved away to serve others, leaving Veriv alone with his memory.

_The bar fell silent and everyone backed away quickly as the man fell to the ground, surrounded by his demons and blind to everything but his own fears. Veriv blinked, trying to keep his power in check. He walked towards the door, leaving the man writhing on the floor. The torment would pass when he called back his power or when he was out of range. Veriv didn't care enough to call it off, instead disappearing through the dumbstruck crowd and out into the night._

_The only drinkers who had neither run nor fought watched him go._

_One man turned back to the table only when the blonde stranger had disappeared into the night. He grinned. "That's who we need! See to it."_

_Immediately three of his men rose and followed Veriv onto the street. The leader gulped down their drinks, ignoring the sounds of the bar and the whimpers of the magicked man, who still lay on the ground._

Veriv looked into the bottom of his empty glass, considering the last few drops. He knew he shouldn't take another glass, but his want for a drink far surpassed his wish to protect the bar from his dangerous magic. He raised his hand and another beer was on the way.

_Simple robberies using his power to incapacitate any guards, he was told while he was blindfolded and bound. He knew he was inside because he was marginally warm, but other than that he was clueless to his whereabouts. A simple proposal, really, what could be easier than using the power he was born with? It was not using it… it was keeping it hidden that caused his troubles. _

_Veriv agreed, not out of greed for the riches promised. He wasn't driven by bags of gold. He agreed because they needed him, Veriv Charter, the abandoned and feared son of a village nobody. The one the villagers hated because it was he they didn't understand. The one who had never been able to do anything without his curse getting in the way. Now, that same curse would become his strength, his definition and his gift. Veriv agreed because it would make him something._

Draining the last of his mug, Veriv stood, only a little unsteady. He had the genarmed to think about. Too much more alcohol and a scene like that which had occurred all those years ago might reoccur. They would know where to search for him, then, and he wasn't ready to be caught. He had his revenge to complete. At least the alcohol would warm him. He had a lookout's lookout (he chuckled into his coat's collar at the thought) to take care of tonight— the third in two weeks. His old friend was getting nervous, had moved his family out of their home and in with friends.

The man wasn't afraid yet, even though he had to know it was Veriv on his tail. Maybe he thought the errant mage was going to be content with the lookouts. Or maybe he thought Veriv couldn't do much other than put the fear in him. Veriv tapped one of his knives, hidden on his belt, and grinned.

-----

Tris and Peri sat in one of the chairs near the fire. Tris was in the seat, pushed as far over as she could be to one side so Peri could perch on the opposite arm. They shared a chair because the rest of the furniture in the boys' dormitory had been tipped and dragged into three separate forts.

"What were you _doing_?" Peri asked, watching her brother, Tridian and Eurey pull the room back into order.

"Oh, you know how it happens," Raeg huffed, carrying a desk past them.

"Yeah," Tridian said, laughing as he tipped a chair back onto its legs and turned to look at them. "You wake up one morning and just have to get into a spark fight."

"Spark fight?" Peri asked, looking at Tris, who shrugged. She had no idea what they were talking about.

Raeg summoned a spark of power and shot it at Eurey, who dropped the chair he was carrying in order to get out of the way.

"Spark fight." Raeg grinned.

"I'm positive that is what Ravenfeather had in mind when he taught us that." Tris said dryly. Behind their chair, Dominik snorted. Peri twisted to look at him.

"Why aren't you helping?" she asked.

"I had nothing to do with it," he said. He was a dark skinned boy with curly black hair and was much quieter than his friends. "I'm not helping them clean up their mess."

"Didn't you try to stop them?" Peri asked. Tris saw her lips twitch. She was baiting him, and was rewarded when Dominik glared at his friends.

"They ganged up on me. Tridian got me under a cushion and the others sparked me."

"What do your roommates think about the stupid things you get up to?" Peri asked her brother. The boys' dorm was much larger than the girls'— there were two floors, each with two rooms of male students.

"They're smarter than Dominik," Raeg replied. "They run."

Dominik just shook his head as his friends teased him, leaning against the wall with a smile. As the boys continued putting the room together and relived the fight for Peri, Dominik walked forward to Tris's side of the chair and knelt beside it.

"Aren't you annoyed by our childishness?" he asked, looking at the floor. Tris looked at him and frowned.

"Why would I be?"

"You seem… you seem to believe that it should be about the studying and the serious use of magic and the using it for play, well that's not allowed," Dominik said, still not looking at her. "I agree with you for the most part— magic isn't something to be used frivolously— but it's a part of us, you know, and if we're serious all the time it will turn sour. Raeg… Raeg has to use what he can in order to find some joy because no one is handing that to him." Tris watched him for a moment in silence before looking up at Raeg who was sitting of one of the desk, watching as Eurey and Tridian fought over a copper coin they found under one of the cushioned chairs.

"We try," Dominik said. "But it only takes one mention of his mother's death or his stupid father and he goes back to not trusting anyone. And I think if he sees how much you disapprove of how they have fun… well…" Dominik shook his head, frustrated by her silence.

"Of course I take magic seriously. Magic can do so much; it can save people's lives or their homes or their livelihoods. It can destroy people. It deserves to be taken seriously."

"I don't want—" Dominik said, looking up at her angrily. She held out a hand gently, cutting him off. She pursed her lips and tugged one of her braids as she thought.

"I grew up in one of the Circle temples, you know." Tris nodded when Dominik shook his head. There was another moment of silence as they watched the boys drag a heavy desk off its precarious perch on top of three small chairs. "My brother is a mage but he thinks he's still a kid half the time and he always played tricks on me and my sisters." Tris didn't notice Dominik's confusion at 'kid'. She was picturing Sandry's face after he had hidden all of her hair ribbons in different jars in the kitchen. "My sisters and I thought up a plan for revenge using our magic."

Sandry and Daja had begged her for weeks for her help. She never would have agreed, but Briar had found out that a certain herb would make glass fog up if it was rubbed with the crushed up leaves and after a day of being unable to see through her lenses she would have agreed to anything.

"He has a weakness for food, my brother, so we got a basket that our foster-mothers usually used to bring food back from the kitchens and we packed it full of powdered sugar. We hid on the stairs and sure enough he walked out of his room and went directly to the basket to see what snacks were in it," Dominik was beginning to smile, seeing where the story was going.

Tris left out how Sandry's cloth had pulled the powdered sugar up when he pulled the cover off the basket and how Tris had used the wind, but the results would have been the same if she had been an academic mage. "He pulled the cover off and we made the sugar explode out of the basket so that it covered him, and most of the room, actually." Tris looked over at Dominik's delighted smile. "We overestimated how much sugar we'd need. His cursing brought our foster mother into the house from her garden and when she saw the state of him and us three laughing our heads off on the staircase…" Tris grinned at the memory as Dominik laughed.

"She made us all clean up the sugar together, lecturing us the whole time about wastes of food…. It was worth it when my brother stormed away without realizing his hair and eyebrows were still snow-white." Dominik and Tris laughed, just as Tridian announced that the room was clean.

Raeg looked across the room at the sound of their laughter, looking from one to the other. Peri jumped off the chair.

"Finally!" she announced. "Can we get some studying done? I don't understand anything Thyme was saying."

Dominik and Tris stood up. "That was years ago but I do understand what you're saying, Dominik," Tris said quietly. "I've been surrounded by magic most of my life. I've seen people who used their magic like a tool," she said, thinking of Yarrun Firetamer, the mage who had died rather than listen to his magic when it told him he couldn't put out another fire. "And I know that if you do that…. It eats you up. I never thought you were childish."

"Tris! We need you to explain why these rebellions have anything to do with Zuhayer the Mighty."

Tris rolled her eyes at Dominik as they walked over to join the group. Raeg waved her over to a seat beside his. "He was Zuhayer the _Magnificent_," Peri made a face at the correction. "And it was the rebellions that forced him to construct the Great Square."


	12. Silences

A/N Sunsday= Sunday, Snow Moon= November

* * *

Peri's dorm room was chilly, the light shining through the window a dull, muted grey.

Periann chattered animatedly at Tris as she readied herself for her visit with her father. She had put on her best— and most expensive, Tris noted— dress behind the changing screen and now stood in front of the mirror in her dresser door, pulling her hair up and pinning it on her head.

"It's not that he doesn't want to visit," Periann told her silent friend, mumbling through the pins held between her lips. "He's just so busy! And since we're only allowed visitors on Sunsday… You know how it is." Tris just nodded, not bothering to tell her that her own family was two countries away, on the coast of the Pebbled Sea. A day visit? Not likely. And her _father_ was five countries away, if he was still alive. Tris hadn't heard from him in over nine years.

"He would come more if he could. There's been a major case he's been working on for two months now, he tells me in his letters, but he did not tell me what it was about," Periann continued, as she took the last pin from her mouth and put it through her hair. "There!" she exclaimed, tilting her head to try and look at the back. "Is that all right?" she asked Tris.

Tris pasted on a smile, not showing the homesickness that was churning in her belly. "Yes," she said simply.

Periann put the finishing touches on her outfit, including a silver locket that she had hid in the back of her bags. Tris smiled slightly at that. It was like her modest friend to hide the signs of her wealth from her fellow students. It was also like her to get them all out again for her father, to show him what he wanted to see. Periann tried too hard to please, sometimes. They walked through the common room together. Right before running out the door, Periann turned to Tris, throwing her arms about the redhead's shoulders and squeezing quickly, letting go and backing away before Tris could react.

"I'm sorry your family can't make it, Siri," she whispered. "I'll be back soon, and we can go up on the wall over the city, okay?"

Tris nodded and smiled as Periann waved once more at the door. The girl had an uncanny ability to see through a lot of Tris's masks. Although not the major mask she wore: her true power and past. Tris had no intention of telling anyone about that, not Periann and not a meddling professor with a nose for powerful artifacts.

The mess of missing her home and stress over her charade was building up, and Tris needed fresh air. She decided to walk around campus, rather than return to her own dormitory. The low, grey skies told Tris, even without her power, that more snow was soon to be on the way. They would be snowed into the buildings if the winter continued this way. Tris had to resist the urge to soar up and see just how far this storm stretched. She had been taking the magical buildup and putting it into her braids during her daily meditation, instead of using it. She knew well that she couldn't leave it unused for too long— any buildup of power was dangerous— but storing it in her braids bought her time. Enough time to wait until summer, when she would be in her own world again.

Tris found her way into a back courtyard, a small garden with a pond and green ivy that grew along the stone walls. Now, the pond was iced over and almost indistinguishable from the snowy pathway and the ivy was only brown stems and twigs snaking along the cold stone. Tris had liked to come here for the plants, before they had turned red and then brown for winter. They were the only ones she had found on the grounds. She could see why Rosethorn had hated her time here: there were so few living things. Tris was surprised to find Raeg sitting on a wrought metal bench, feeding pigeons crumbs from a breakfast bun. She stopped at the entranceway, trying to decide whether or not to leave him be. Finally, her curiosity got the better of her and she entered slowly, going along the ivy-covered stone wall as to not startle the birds.

"Can I help you?" Raeg asked, not looking up from the birds. Tris remembered a time when she had opened their conversation the same way, in a library exactly two months ago. Trying to decide if this was a joke or a hint to leave, Tris stopped with her back against the wall.

"Do you feed them often?" she asked neutrally, hoping that his answer would tell her what to do.

"Whenever I can. More in the summer, when I don't have classes," he replied.

Tris took this as a welcome and moved forward slowly, inching around the bench, so the birds just hopped away instead of flying for cover. She sat beside Raeg, looking at the pink and grey creatures as they waddled back to their feet. "You visit the campus in the summer?" Tris asked without looking up from the birds.

A silence passed. Raeg broke the remaining bun in two, handing Tris a piece. Tris took it gladly, her face softening as the birds took the crumbs she dropped onto the snow. She didn't notice Raeg studying her. He finally decided that what he was seeing was contentment, a feeling that was quieter than happiness, but one that took more to bring it to life. He wondered what mysteries she held in her heart, that she was so infrequently content.

He looked down, hiding away from the grey glare. "I live here in the summer," Raeg said quietly. Tris looked up at him, as he had feared, but he was studying each bird that had come for food, not looking at her. He didn't want to see her pity. "I live here all year around. I haven't been welcome in my father's house for ten years, ever since he rose to Lord Genarmed. It was all right before, when he was just an officer, to have a bastard," the word was spat out, his anger apparent, "living in his house, but now… it could do only harm to his position. I had to 'think of the family'," he said, obviously quoting someone's exact words.

Tris winced. She could still, even after all these years, remember the words used by her parents when they had given her up. "I was practically forced on the staff here," he added bitterly. "They don't like taking care of students anymore than they have to. They told him to send me to a temple but the closest one is a full week's ride, where I would never see my mother's family or my friends. Ravenfeather made sure I could stay. He stood up for me, more than my father has done." The courtyard was silent, he threw the birds bread as he contemplated his next words, what had him bothered enough to sit on a cold metal bench and feed birds. "He's here today, you know," he continued, looking up at Tris. "Of course you do. You're Peri's friend." There was another silence. Raeg leaned back on the bench, resting his back, just below the shoulder blades, on the edge, his head hanging over the back. Tris didn't know what to say.

_I could tell him I understand_, she thought. _I could tell him about my family, and how they gave me away because I was different. Because I scared them. But how can that fit into Siri's life? How would I ever explain it without going into everything that Tris is, everything I am hiding here?_

"He just asked for her," Raeg said, talking to the sky. "Even though, here, they all know. It wouldn't have mattered and still he asks just for her." He looked over at Tris, who was wrestling with herself, trying to decide between comfort and her own agenda. "Why am I telling you? You don't care." He laughed, bitterly and stood up. The birds rose in a flock and flew from the clearing, their wings filling the air with a feathered beat. Raeg waited until they were gone and the courtyard quiet again before he spoke. "See you around, Siri. Tell my sister—" he cut his bitter sentence short and just stalked from the yard, leaving Tris alone, without even the birds as comfort.

-----

Veriv had become frustrated. She had not visited the city again and he was not yet ready to enter the school. They thought they were safe, there. The illusion must be maintained until he was ready to strike.

To make his job more difficult, the genarmed of the city were on his tail, getting closer as he was required to stay in one area, watching his target. It was making the Lord nervous, Veriv knew, his proximity to the school and the edge of the genarmed's reach. There was magic preventing them from entering the school uninvited, and the Lord Genarmed knew better than most that Veriv might not need to fear the mages.

Veriv turned up the collar of his coat, a dark brown that nicely hid the blood of its previous owner. It had been a ploy to draw the annoying genarmed away from his true location, to kill far from the school. Unfortunately it hadn't tricked them for long. This new Lord knew Veriv well. It was Veriv's capture that had led to the promotion, after all.

Truethought wasn't an arrogant man. He understood that capture would be imminent, but only if he delayed.

The pieces would fall into place soon. And then, he would finally be free.

-----

The common room was cozy, if a little overly warm. Tris sat close to the fire, watching its life play out. She admired the simplicity: Burn up, burn out. That was how a fire lived, but humans… their lives were more complicated.

The sound of an opening door echoed up the stairs, pushed ahead by the wind that was vacuumed in when the door opened. Tris was surprised to hear crying. After a moment, the sounds stopped and there were footsteps up the hallway and on the stairs. Rustles of fabric and a hearty sniff, and the door opened, to reveal an apparently cheerful Periann.

"There you are, Siri! You didn't stay here all day, did you? Just wait, I'll be back in just a moment. I've got to change out of this coat!" Periann rustled into the small slush room. Tris waited, thinking of all the times Periann had seen through her own acts to what was really inside. For the second time that day, Tris was confronted with the choice of comforting a friend while risking her secret or leaving them to their sadness to serve herself.

Periann sat in the chair beside Tris's, leaning forward to warm her hands and red cheeks in the fire's warmth. She chattered about her father's visit; the news he had, the letters from her mother, his promise that they would visit their summer home when her first year was done, the trip he had to go on soon, and the earrings he brought as a gift. After a few minutes she, too, grew silent, weighed down by her worry.

Tris stared at the fire, listening to the silence of all the things she had left unsaid that day. She wished she could just be Siri, without the secrets and the mysteries and the overwhelming silences. She wished she could offer comfort without thinking of her own pains and how they couldn't come into the conversation. Sometimes she wished she had never been Tris at all.

Periann, while wrapped up in thoughts of a brother's heritage and a father's stubborn ways, still remembered her promise to her friend.

She started her sentence before she looked away from the fire. "Are you rea—" She froze, seeing what looked like lightning playing along the end of her friend's braid, near the arm of her spectacles. The redhead jumped with the sentence and as she turned to look at Periann, the sparks faded as if they had never existed.

_And they hadn't_, Periann knew. She blinked hard, smiled and repeated her half-completed sentence. "Are you ready to go out on the wall?"

The thought of the sights, the fresh air and the freedom made Tris lose her gloom. _If only those winds weren't seasonal_, she thought, following Periann from the warm room. _I feel like they really could blow away my worries, if only they were around._

Periann talked as usual on their way to their favorite spot on the wall. They didn't go back to where Raeg had taken them their second day. He had said it was a twice-a-year tradition and they silently followed that rule. Instead, they found a small covered alley between the wall and one of the storage buildings. Hidden in that alley, a steep stone stair led up onto a small section of wall, blocked on one side by a guard's tower, and on the other by the tall stone that bordered the main gate.

Periann stood slightly away from the wall, instinctively avoiding touching anything that might be cold in a Northerner way. Tris leaned her forearms on it, looking out over the city.

"You really like heights," Periann observed.

"I always have," Tris admitted, remembering a time when Niko had advised her to have a tower, wherever she settled.

"I used to hate them," Periann said quietly. "But, here…" she trailed off, trying to find the right words. Tris just watched her. Peri always seemed to know exactly what to say, and often wasn't able to get the words out fast enough. Where the wall and the winds and the view strengthened Tris, it calmed Periann. "Here, I feel as if I am looking at my home. I know my father is running things out there, taking care of everything I see," she paused again, a trace of sadness running over her features. "Maybe that's why he only comes up twice a year," she whispered, talking of Raeg, for her own ears more than for Tris's. A tear traced down her cheek, and she wiped it away quickly, not looking over to see if her companion had noticed. Tris had. "I just—" Periann continued. "I just wish he had asked for him."

Tris didn't say anything, but she found that she didn't need to. Instead she put her hand on Periann's shoulder, offering a comfort without words. Periann sniffed, looking out over her father's city, torn between her family members. Tris wondered if she herself had siblings, at home. She was very young when she had seen her parents for the last time. They had been young enough to have another child, to try for a child they could love. One who was normal.

Lost in the burden of families, Periann and Tris stared out over the city.

Looking up at them, unnoticed, was a man in a dark brown coat.

-----

Veriv watched the Lord Genarmed ride from Lightsbridge. The man had ridden his horse down the stone bridge that led from the school the city. It had been wood, once, that bridge. They would have had it burned it if there was any trouble in the city. The arrogance of the mages and their confidence in their own abilities had led to it being rebuilt in stone. That same year, the genarmed were barred from their territory.

Then Veriv watched the target and her companion climb onto the wall, in a direct path to where he was standing. The girl seemed to hardly ever be without that other one, Veriv had noticed. He would either have to catch his target at a time when she was alone or he would have to dispose of her friend.

He didn't care about which path he ended up taking. Morals had long taken flight from the realms of his mind.


	13. Tomes

Tris had spent a great deal of time in the libraries of Lightbridge. Not even Duke Vedris', though she hated to admit it, compared to the vast collection of the University. The largest library consisted of six main rooms and countless smaller rooms and corridors that formed a circle in the heart of the school. Multiple doors led from each room, often into the same space. The rooms created a labyrinth of bookshelves and hidden archways, a maze that most students could get lost in for hours.

After the disturbing vision she had shared with her siblings, Tris had spent a lot of time in the books on magical visions, but she had been unable to find anything that could explain what had happened. It didn't help that scrying on the wind was almost as uncommon as the attack though a vision itself. After almost three weeks, Daja had finally voiced it to the other three that there just might not be any record of something like this happening, not even in Lightsbridge. They were all exhausted by their efforts and, with Tris loaded up with school-work, they had agreed to give up the search. The fear was behind them and so the motivation was gone.

Tris hardly thought about that time when she entered the library to look up the Kurchal Empire expansion for her history class. Her history professor was a stout older man, with wild ginger hair that was thinning erratically and never seemed to have been brushed. He was one of the few she enjoyed, now.

None of the rest had shown any sign of the open mistrust Ravenfeather had, which either meant he hadn't told his colleagues of his suspicions or else they hadn't believed him. His class had become a test in Tris's control far more than any other. Only her fear of revealing her power to him kept her in check while she was in his room. She wouldn't have trusted anyone else with her secret, even if she had had someone who would listen and be able to help. Tris's life hadn't raised her to be an open individual. The more she kept hidden, the safer she would be.

Tris made her way around the bookshelves. An archway was hidden behind a diagonally placed bookshelf. Ducking through it, Tris made her way further into the rooms. She had seen books on Kurchal. She would recognize the right room when she found it.

After moving through another, less hidden, door, Tris stopped, frowning. She could hear raised voices, and since they weren't on the wind, she knew they had to be somewhere nearby. Instinct told her to continue her search. It was none of her business what they were fighting about, if they were even fighting. Tris couldn't hear the words. Even if they were _kaqs_ for making so much noise in a library it was none of her business.

Continuing her search, the voices faded out as she moved through another narrow corridor. However, soon she could hear them again, having moved in some type of circle because of the strange way the library was built. Tris stopped, tapping her foot on the stone floor. The voices were now ahead of her somewhere, and she was positive that was the way she needed to go. She didn't want to walk right into a fight, and she could hear the tones of the voices now. It was definitely a fight.

_I need that book_, she told herself.

_It's a fight. You'll walk straight into a fight. You hate fights._

_I'll just get closer and see if they are in the way or in the room. If they're actually in the room I need, I'll come back later._

Convinced, Tris started forward again, still hoping that she could end up making a detour around the people. After a few more seconds, however, the books were forgotten. Tris picked up her pace, following her sensitive ears to the source of the yelling. She recognized the voices.

Why were Raeg and Periann yelling at each other in the middle of the library?

"— never cause any… so perfect—" Raeg's voice filtered through and Tris followed it, stopping short and often turning around completely when the sound got quieter.

Telling herself that it was no business of hers, she continued following the shriller, easier to hear sound as Periann got in her say.

"What do you want from me? I—" Wrong turn, she turned and retraced her steps. "—and for what? You—" Tris had entered a narrow section of one of the rooms, picking a door on the right-hand side. Now she turned around and went through the door on the opposite wall. She was getting closer.

"—always _tried_. You did _everything_ you were asked, and you didn't talk to me for three years! You were as much a part of it as he was!" Raeg's voice seemed to echo in Tris's mind as she turned a corner and was unexpectedly in the same room as the fight— too obvious to turn and hide, she froze. Raeg was up, standing across a table from his half-sister. Periann remained defiantly seated, her arms crossed. She looked almost relaxed, but her voice was clogged with anger and tears when she yelled back at Raeg.

"I never did anything! I have always been in the middle of you two, and I tried to keep us a family! I never asked for this. I never asked for any of this! It's not my fault that he loves _me_ and not—" Periann stopped short, clapping her hand over her mouth in horror. There was a silence that stretched out, surpassing awkwardness. Everything that could have gone unsaid passed between them in that silence.

"And not me," Raeg finished.

"I never— I didn't... mean that. Raeg, I didn't," Periann stuttered, her hand falling to her neck as she tried to stutter out an apology.

"It's true, though. Isn't it?" Raeg asked, his voice deceptively calm as he looked past his half-sister. "No, it's not your fault he only loves you. But you sure have taken advantage of it," he finished, scathingly. Turning, he ignored her pleas and walked out of the library, leaving Tris to deal with Periann's sudden tears.

Periann looked at Tris, who hadn't moved from her vantage point under the archway. "I didn't mean it, Siri, I don't think that!" Periann gasped. She accepted Tris's presence without question, anger or embarrassment at being caught in a horrible state. Tris would have lashed out but Periann, instead, asked for help. "What do I do?" she whispered.

Tris almost shrugged it away, but the pain on her friend's face was too much to walk away from. Tris walked around the table, sitting beside the other girl.

"Just... leave it be for now," Tris said. "He'll calm down."

"Do you even understand how much that hurt him?" Periann asked, looking at her lap, not at Tris. The redhead winced. She could imagine it. It had happened to her, after all, although it was mean-spirited girls in a dark dormitory and not her half-sister that had said the words. They had dug just as deep.

"I have to go apologize," Periann said, standing up to chase after Raeg. Tris nearly let her go. She would run after him and he would still be angry and hurt. She would try to apologize and he would snap, say things he didn't mean. They would hate each other. Tris knew because she would have done it. She and Raeg weren't as different as she had thought.

"Periann, go back to your room," Tris said, stopping the brunette from getting away. "I'll talk to Raeg first,"

"You would?" Periann whispered, wiping under her eyes to try and stop the tears. "I think he wouldn't be happy to see me."

"Really?" Tris asked. It came out sarcastically. Tris saw Raeg's side much more easily than she could ever see Periann's.

-----

Tris thought she knew where to find him. It took her a while to get there, as she had been refusing to run for years, so when she walked into the frozen courtyard, Raeg was already well-established in the cold. There were no birds today, but Raeg looked as if he would have chased them away, anyway. He stared at the stone wall across the pond, refusing to look away, even though he must have known Tris was there.

"She's your sister," Tris opened, almost wincing at how stupid the thought sounded out loud. In her mind it was a clear distinction: Sandry and Daja would risk their lives for her, were as much a part of her as her magic. To Tris, a sister was someone who would never intentionally cause harm. But she couldn't explain that to him.

"So, I should love her and cherish her?" he asked, not turning to look at her. "Is that what you think, Siri? You're more naïve than I thought you were."

Tris took a deep breath. "I'm not," she said quietly, trying to find the place within herself, the patience she had found when she was violently ill from the visions and had a cranky five-year-old to care for who just wouldn't go to bed. "But I do think that. She hates what your father did. You made her angry, and she said things she didn't mean, but—"

"Years," he said, finally looking at Tris. She was shocked to see the tears on his cheeks. It was clear that he hadn't noticed them yet. Tris could remember being that angry. "He has not spoken to me or written me a letter since he left me here. And I heard nothing from her, either. Then she gets here," Raeg continued in a high voice, mimicking Periann in bitter tones. "'Oh, Raeg, brother mine, where have you been?' Like I was on vacation, not in exile.

"If she hated it so much she would have snuck out a letter. If she hated it so much she would have told me, Siri!" He shook his head. "What do you know of it? What could you possibly know that would make you even close to being able to lecture me?"

Tris felt her anger rise.

_"My family abandoned me too! They passed me along from relative to relative, and when _they_ didn't want me anymore they took me to a temple. They told them that they never wanted to see me again."_

She said none of it. She couldn't. Even after nine years, it hurt too much to tell this almost-stranger.

_Is that what I'm supposed to tell him? That he'll always carry around the anger towards the people who abandoned him? Is that all I have to give?_

Maybe that's all Tris had to give. Maybe Siri could do better.

"So what?" Tris asked, her voice level. Raeg looked at her, angry and confused. "So what if she didn't write?" He started to answer, to argue, but she cut him off. "She's making an attempt _now_. And it might be late and you might—" – _be too scared to let her that close to you, because you may only find that she'll leave again._ This was too close to Tris's heart. She stopped herself. "You might not want her to have it easy. So, you stay angry. You push away everyone because you are bitter and hurt and humiliated—" – _just like me_— "—but it won't get better, can't you see that? In the end, you'll still be alone, but it will be your fault. And no one else's." Raeg stared at her, and this time Tris looked away. He sat and she stood in silence, but he didn't yell at her and he didn't go away and he didn't _really_ get mad at her, Gods be praised, so she took it as a good sign and she let him think. She was getting impatient when he finally answered.

"Aren't there worse things than being alone?" he asked. It seemed like an honest question, so Tris, out of everything her foster-family had taught her, answered honestly.

"No."

A single pigeon flew down from over the roofs, its white and black-speckled coat blending into the snow. Raeg looked down at it as it bobbled its way over to his shoe.

"I have no food for you today," he told it. It didn't fly away, instead turning its head to scrutinize the boy, perhaps thinking that the food would come if it stared long enough.

Raeg finally stood up, scaring the pigeon away. He walked over to Tris. She fought the impulse to take a step back. He stopped a short distance away, looking her over, as if she had surprised him today.

"Thank you, Siri," he said, finally. There was honesty in his sentiment, but a question too. It wasn't a question Siri could answer. He didn't know that he should be asking Tris.

"Go get an apology," Tris ordered lightly.

Raeg grimaced, but did as he was told. Tris had that effect on people.

She moved over to the bench, sinking onto it in relief. She covered her face with her hands. If she hadn't been able to get him to listen... She had had no plan. She didn't know what she would have done if he had gotten angry.

"I heard about the fight, and came here to talk some sense into him," a crisp voice said from the doorway opposite where Tris had entered and Raeg had left. Tris looked up at Ravenfeather, immediately on alert. "But it seems you have more than one secret. Not only are you the owner of a powerful amulet, but you can solve feuds in a single discussion." He looked at Tris, his eyebrows raised in question. Tris put on the diplomatic polite face she had learned from Sandry and the Duke. She was tired but he would get nothing from her. "When he came to me three years ago, I thought there was no way he'd ever forgive his family but I didn't know you then, correct?"

"I am doing no harm," Tris said, her voice fighting to stay neutral. The dive into her memories had taken more out of her than she had realized. She was drained and her control was slipping. She could feel it.

"Not that I can see," Ravenfeather agreed. "But there are more secrets to you than Niklaren Goldeye himself could see through." The unexpected mention of her teacher made her wince noticeably. Ravenfeather caught it and looked at her, interested. Tris felt her anger flare. How dare he examine her like she was one of his experiments? What right did he have to threaten her dream— the only thing she ever wanted?

The clouds overhead churned and deepened, taking the light and warmth out of the courtyard. Lightning flashed, sheets of the electricity called to the sky by Tris's anger. Ravenfeather looked up at the unexpected weather change and Tris jumped up, leaving the courtyard as quickly as her pride would let her.

"Siri!" her professor called after her, but she didn't stop. Let him wonder why the lightning stopped and the skies cleared when she was gone. She stopped dead in the stone corridor, leaning against the wall. She closed her eyes and let her braided head thump softly against the stone. What was she going to do?


	14. Quarrel

A/N Firesday=Friday

* * *

Briar sat inside their house in Summersea, wrestling with one of his new miniature pines. He was trying it a Yanjing style he had learned that enhanced protection spells, but the branches would rearrange themselves as he tended to a different part of the tree so that when he looked back at a curve he had spent hours trying to shape he would see that it looked exactly as it had when he had started.

He had tried pleading, threatening, ordering and reasoning with the tree. When it happened for the fifth time he hit his head down on the table he was working at. Honestly considering composting the project— _which wouldn't bother me any, right now,_ he shot at the innocent looking tree— he stood up and moved to the window. Briar rubbed his sleeve against the glass, wiping away the fog that hid his view of the outside, only to find that it made no difference to the scenery. Winter rains ran down the glass, hiding what Briar knew he'd see; dark, churning grey skies, muddy streets, sleeping plants. Nothing out there for him.

_Tris isn't getting these rains_, he thought jealously. _She's got nice, fluffy snow_. He rolled his head, cracking his neck, as he glared at the tree, hoping for any distraction to keep him away from the devil-pine.

As he asked for it, as if a present from the gods, the far door opened and his foster sisters walked in.

"We have something to talk to you about, Briar."

-----

The week passed awkwardly. Raeg and Periann had, officially, apologized, but there was still tension between them. Raeg dealt with his hurt feelings and his anger by dwelling on it, refusing to answer in more than few word answers to direct questions. Peri tried to deal with it by talking more, about anything that caught her attention, which drove both Raeg and Tris close to the edge of their patience. They would often exchange pained expressions in the middle of one of her monologues, relieving the tension until Raeg thought of the fight and sank again into silence.

Tris met up with her friends on Firesday, moving from class to class with Raeg's silence and Peri's chatter and looking forward to the weekend. She only had to get through meditation, theory and history, and then she was free to hide away from their quarrel. Any longer, and she would surely lose her temper.

Theory was one of the group's most feared classes as it was mostly reading and equations. Tris found it interesting: she had had little reason to study the math or technicalities behind runes or spell structure at Winding Circle. She and Raeg's friend Dominik were the only two to consistently get the right answers. Firesday's class was taught by Windmessenger, their only female teacher, whose vast experience with experimental runes intrigued Tris. The idea that the spell worked exactly the same every time, no matter who was to use it, was something that appealed to Tris especially since her magic and its results were so unique and that was what brought up the negative feelings in others.

Meditation was next and, as always, was difficult to get through. Professor Clearwater was, in Tris's opinion, pompous, arrogant and mean. She had repeated her tactic from the first class, ignoring him so soundly that he no longer tried to critique her form. Today, she sat on the hard floor between Raeg and Peri, trying to get into her meditation before she could be annoyed at the pressure on her ankles and hips. _Can't even get us mats to sit on, he's so bitter_, she thought. She was tending to the small lightnings in the core of her power that were trying to edge out of their place when she was distracted by voices. Raeg and Peri were leaning over her, talking softly. They were sitting on either side of her, so when they leaned over to talk their faces were directly in front of hers, clearly not expecting her to notice through her meditation.

"You could have done something, you just abandoned—"

"He got so angry, Raeg—"

"I was here all by myself and I wish—"

"I was afraid that he'd get rid of me too, and that's horrible, but—"

"What are you two doing?" Tris hissed. They jumped and turned to look at her. Finding her face mere inches away from theirs— away from Raeg's— Tris leaned back and bumped into the legs of someone standing behind her.

Clearwater cleared his throat loudly. The three of them jumped, looking backwards and up at his disapproving face. Tris shuffled forward so that she wasn't leaning on his legs, her face red.

"Do you think you have something more important to do than be in my class? Is this all a distraction for your conversation?" He paused long enough to make it uncomfortable, while clearly not expecting an answer. Many of the students turned to look at them, easily distracted. The others stayed in their meditation longer, but were soon enough brought out of it by Clearwater's escalating tirade. "If you think I am here three times a week with you to allow you to use my valuable time as a gossip session, you are sorely mistaken. None of you have the sliver of potential it takes to deserve my time and you disrespect me and my lesson in this way? Do you think you are better than what I have to offer? Do you think you know it all? Master Gadrig, you may have lived on this campus because you were unwanted elsewhere, but I assure you that it does not mean you have any extra knowledge." There was an audible intake of breath as the class, including Tris and Peri, gasped. Raeg's face tightened, but he didn't take the bait.

Peri did. "How _dare _you? How dare—"

"Miss Gadrig, do not presume to tell me what I do or do not dare to do. I do not take lessons from half-rate mages, let alone student ones."

Raeg stood up, taking a step toward the old man as Peri's jaw dropped. Tris was up, quick, and between the two men. "What do you think you're going to do?" she asked Raeg softly, her face looking up at his. "Sit yourself down." He took one look at her expression and did as he was told.

"Miss Gadrig, sit in that corner," Clearwater said, pointing to the far end of the room. Peri stood up gracefully, walking across the room with her nose in the air. "And Mister Gadrig, you go into that one," he said, pointing to the corner opposite, by the door. Raeg glared from the floor defiantly for a moment before he got up and moved to the corner. "Miss Farash, with me." Tris followed behind Clearwater to his desk, standing beside it while he riffled through his papers and studiously ignored her.

_We're playing this game, are we?_ Tris thought, _I assure you, I have more patience._ She put on her empty expression and waited. After a moment he looked up. "I have a feeling that you think you are, somehow, better than the rest of them. That you have some hidden knowledge, some expertise that makes you talented, more talented than the rest, but I want to tell you right now that you do not. You are just the same as the rest of the students, and you will treat my class as if it were so." She watched him, trying to keep a smirk off her face. _Shows what you know, you bitter old man._

He looked back down at his papers for a moment. "That clown, Ravenfeather, has been talking of you," he said quietly, dropping his voice so that the other students couldn't hear, even in the silence. Tris's stomach tightened. "I put no weight in what he has to say, because it was obviously more of his ridiculous patterings to get the headmaster's attention— hidden amulets and secret agendas. However, if I were to follow along with his ridiculous theories, you could very well be thrown out of the school and you should remember that, Miss Farash, the next time—" The bell chimed in the middle of his sentence and Tris turned and walked from the room, away from his bitter threats, and into the snow.

_How dare he?_ she thought, unknowingly repeating Peri's words. _How _dare_ he?_ she thought again, thinking of Ravenfeather this time. She turned quickly into a narrow underpass and ducked behind a pillar, breathing heavily. _How dare they get into my business and disrespect me? I am an accredited mage, and I deserve—_

She stopped short, her anger and the lightning she hadn't even realized had formed in her hair faded. He saw right through her. She did think she was better than them. She did think she was different. What was the point in being here to learn this if she'd been assuming she knew it all?

_I suppose I've been more Tris than I thought_, she said to Sandry, Briar and Daja, sending them the class's events.

_Oh_, Sandry replied, distantly. _He's a horrible man, but if you think you can improve, go with it._

_Yes,_ Daja replied, as distant and as quickly as possible. _You're probably right._

_What is going on?_ Tris asked, suspicious.

_Nothing!_ they both replied.

_When you talk in unison I know you're lying_, she replied. Tris tried to see into their minds, but was shut out. _Fine_, Tris said, a little hurt. _I've got to go, anyway._

_Don't be mad_, saati, Daja replied as Tris walked out of the shadows into the reflective daylight of a sunny day on snow. _You'll understand soon._

_We love you_, Sandry said, and they were gone.

"Siri!" Tris looked up as Raeg and Peri walked towards her.

"Can you believe that?" Peri shrilled as they reached her.

"What a giant ass," Raeg said, shaking his head.

"He just completely… What an insult, I can't even. I mean- What a stupid, pigheaded, stupid…"

"A giant ass," Raeg repeated, making Peri laugh. He threw an arm around each of their shoulders as they walked towards the dining hall, his good mood returned to him.

"What did he say to you?" Peri asked Tris, leaning around her brother's chest to look, wide-eyed at her friend. Raeg looked down, too, and Tris shrugged, nonchalant.

"I'm not as good as I think I am, apparently."

"What an ass," Peri said. Raeg was watching Tris suspiciously, but turned to laugh at his sister when she said this, the questions in his head forgotten.

-----

"Thank you so much for doing this, Briar."

"Yup."

"I really appreciate it. Both of us do—"

"I _know_, Miss Bag. Stop nattering at me. Evvy, pass me that trunk." Evvy jumped off the desk where she was sitting amongst his shakkans— carefully— and moved over to the trunk. Her black hair contrasted sharply where it fell onto the shoulders and down the back of her white robe.

"Can you really fit all this on a horse?" Glaki asked quietly from the corner. The ten year old had latched on to Lark, and then Sandry, after Tris went to school and stayed with one of the pair of them as often as she could. "A _mule_ maybe…"

"Or a camel. All the rich, needy noble girls in Yanjing always had their own camels to haul around all the cosmetics and clothes they needed," Evvy said, the grin in her voice hidden from her face. Where Glaki was trying to be helpful, Evvy was just teasing Briar and he knew it.

"You're not helping," he told her.

"I passed you the trunk, didn't I?"

"Briar, will you listen to me for a second—" Sandry tried again.

"Were you saying something Glaki?"

"Oh, that's very mature." Sandry huffed, propping her hands on her hips.

"I _know_ you appreciate this and that you love me and her and have all sorts of girly feelings you want to express, Sandry. But you've forgotten one thing."

"What a bleat-brain you are?"

Evvy and Glaki snorted into their sleeves.

Briar glared at them. "No." He turned back to Sandry. "She's my sister, too."

Sandry's eyes misted.

"Briar, Cakes is peeing on your bed…." Glaki said.

"I told you not to put that cat up there!" Briar wailed at Evvy, as Sandry and Glaki burst into laughter.


	15. Midwinter

A/N Airsday= Wednesday

* * *

Tris spent the weekend away from her friends. Since she was often one of the first people in the dining hall the staff recognized her better than they recognized the students who all came in together, their faces blurred in the rush. Tris divided her free time between the kitchens— where she was often allowed to help them prepare meals— and the library, studying for a test in Theory. She wasn't hiding from Raeg and Peri, exactly, she told herself as she took the long, cold, way to the library from the dining hall. It was just that she couldn't be sure if a common enemy had been enough to keep them from their fight and if she was forced to deal with it again she would definitely lose her temper. It was easier to just avoid them completely.

To increase her bad mood, her scalp was beginning to itch again and she accepted that a mage kit in her hair, while convenient for travel and quick workings, was _extremely_ annoying when the power built up. Briar once described how his _shakkan_ had felt when it was holding too much magic and she found that she could relate. At night it was so distracting that she covered her head with her pillow to keep herself from scratching. She had started a countdown for midwinter: they had two full weeks off after their winter tests when most students would be visiting their families and Tris tempered the disappointment that she would be spending Midwinter alone with the fact that she would have time to deal with her power buildup and ease the infernal itching.

The weeks passed slowly, increasing Tris's temper. Clearwater and Ravenfeather dragged on her patience in different ways. Clearwater insisted that she, Raeg, and Peri resume their punishment spots for meditation. Tris could barely keep from shrieking as she sat beside his desk and tried to meditate through his bitter mumbles. Ravenfeather kept such an annoyingly sharp watch on her that she glared him down more than once in his class.

Periann and Raeg, too, tried her temper. They attempted to be civil to each other, and often succeeded, but the holidays were a touchy subject. Periann would be leaving to spend the week in town with their father while Raeg would be staying on campus with Dominik and Eurey. They didn't speak about it but it made most conversations tense, especially as it got closer to the break and the topic filled the other students' conversations.

It did save Tris from talking about her holiday plans (which consisted of brushing her hair, at the moment). She was sad that she wouldn't get home, and to make matters worse, she hadn't really spoken to her siblings since that odd conversation after meditation.

The last week was full of reviewing. She and Dominik helped Eurey and Tridian in their last-minute attempts to prepare for the tests, sitting in the boys' common room while Raeg rotated between trying to help his friends and distracting them from their work.

"Do you want them to fail?" Tris asked sharply, when Raeg started tossing bits of dried fruit at Eurey's head.

"Of course not. I'm just bored."

"Why don't you study?" Tris asked.

"He doesn't need to study," Tridian said, glaring at Raeg in almost-mock jealousy.

"I just do my reading and notes before the week of the test!" Raeg laughed. Tris shook her head. She couldn't understand how they were joking about this— if they failed these tests, it was almost certain that they wouldn't pass the year.

"These pages are important," she said to Eurey, while Tridian and Raeg argued. "What do you remember about the Configurational Differentiation Theory?"

The sun was below the buildings, leaving the sky a dull grey, but plunging the campus into shadows by the time Tris walked back out into the snow. She tucked her hands into her sleeves as she walked along the path towards her building.

"Hey, Siri?" Tris turned to see Raeg leave his dormitory in just the light Karang coat he had been wearing to study. He caught up to her quickly, folding his arms against the cold.

"Get back inside!" Tris ordered, chilled even in her full winter clothes. "It's freezing!"

"I'm fine," Raeg said, bouncing a bit to keep warm. "I just want to talk to you about something."

Tris waited. It was slightly too dark to make out his expressions clearly, especially with his back to the light of the boy's dormitory building. She watched their misty breath disappear into the air between them for a long moment. "What?" she asked impatiently.

"Well, we're both staying on campus for Midwinter, and— well, so are Dom and Eurey, but what I mean is…. Well, since we're both going to be here I just thought we could spend some time… together."

"I do spend time with you, Dominik and Eurey," Tris said, slowly. Had he forgotten the last two hours?

"What? No, I didn't mean that about them. I mean, I do mean they're staying, but what I mean is—"

"Raeg, will you just tell me what you're trying to say?"

"Siri—"

_Look behind you! _Sandry exclaimed, her and Daja suddenly clamouring for attention.

Tris turned to look over her shoulder and gasped when she saw the tall, dark haired, bronze skinned boy standing in the snow, his hands thrust into his Yanjiing-style coat's pockets and a grin on his face.

"Hey, Coppercurls," Briar said.

_We told you you'd know soon—_

_We're so sorry, but we wanted him to surprise—_

_We couldn't come, but you can't be alone for Midwinter—_

Tris stood frozen for a moment, listening to Sandry and Daja in her mind. Then it hit her and she ran towards him. He laughed as they hugged.

"I can't believe you're here!" She leaned back to look at him, frowning. "I can't believe you'd surprise me— you know I hate surprises."

"It's good for you," Briar replied cheekily. "Happy Midwinter."

Reminded of the conversation she had just been having, she turned back to Raeg, only to find the pathway empty except for snow.

"Where are you staying?" Tris said, unable to wonder while distracted by the questions she had for her brother.

"In town," Briar said. "I rented a house so you could stay away from prying eyes and have your fun with flashing lights and other dangerous toys. I notice you're not even creating heat for yourself."

"And have someone bump into me and notice?" Tris asked. "Not likely."

"The pathway's empty now, heat us up so I don't die out here."

"Oh, stop complaining," Tris sighed. She looked around at the empty campus before grudgingly doing the magic. "It's not even that cold."

"You've just gotten used to it."

Tris thought about that while they walked towards her building. Briar chatted about the place he had rented for them here, his trip from Summersea, and told her about Sandry and Daja's plot to surprise her.

_Are you happy_, saati? Sandry asked. Tris could practically feel her bouncing up and down.

_Of course_, Tris replied, letting all of them hear. _This is the best Midwinter present._ Briar bumped her with his shoulder, smiling.

Daja spoke to Tris privately. _Sandry couldn't leave the Duke, not during his social season when there's so much more responsibility and Briar and I just couldn't leave her alone for the holidays. You understand, right? We'd all have loved to come…_

_I know. Thanks anyway._

"You, too, Briar," she said aloud. "Thank you."

"Oh, you know Sandry. She'd have bugged me 'til I left. It was for my own good."

Tris just rolled her eyes.

-----

The test started the next morning, and there was no time for socializing. The first two days were the tests for the non-magical classes and Tris hurried around campus; catching up on studying with everyone else in the abnormally quiet dining hall, trying not to run into people walking the pathways with their faces in their notes, and dodging people trying to catch loose papers caught on the breeze; all while reciting dates and facts in her head. Being on such different schedules, and studying between classes and at night, it wasn't until Airsday that Tris saw Peri at all.

"I thought you were spending Midwinter here," Peri said when they met for dinner. There were half-carried on conversations going on around them and the steady rustle of papers. The magical tests started the next day and these were the tests that mattered to the mage students. Peri's hushed voice sounded loud in the quiet room.

"My brother surprised me— I didn't realize he'd be coming to visit."

"Your brother?" Peri asked, surprised. Tris had told her about her siblings, in general terms, so Tris didn't understand why she sounded so confused.

Peri suddenly smiled, bringing two fingers to her lips. She looked at Tris with an odd expression as if she had just figured something out and was delighted at the result.

"I don't think that's what Raeg thinks," she said.

"Raeg?" Tris wasn't paying attention to the conversation. _In 823, K.F., the first accelerating spells were documented, using the Triangular Rune System…_

"He was talking to you when your brother came up…."

"Without a coat, the idiot," Tris scoffed. _This made group spells much more productive, as some of the mages could use the spell to advance the effects…_

"Right. Well, I don't think he gets that it's your brother."

"Who else would he be?" Tris asked. She was distracted by the bell tolling the hour. Everyone was standing, stuffing away papers, trying to frantically read the last bit of their notes, and hurrying into the cold. "We have Theory, come on," she said, walking towards the exit without waiting for Peri.

The girl huffed as she got off the bench and hurried after the redhead.

Ravenfeather took the tests too seriously to spend any time pondering Tris— although she loathed to think of what he was going to come up with over the break— and with no tests in meditation, Tris managed to have a relatively peaceful week. She had not been too worked up about the tests, as most of her classmates were: she was used to retaining information and had been confident in her ability to pass. She was also used to keeping notes, where some of the students who had not come from a temple or university were not.

Briar met her outside her classroom on her last day. There were a few students poring over their papers, but most were celebrating the spirit of freedom: they had a full week off to relax until they were hit with their results. Tris walked across the snow, ignoring the path, until she stood in front of him. He looked at her notebook and frowned.

"Aren't you ready?" he asked.

"We need to go back to my dormitory," Tris said. She turned and walked away when his frown deepened.

"Do you understand how much I loathe the cold— actually _loathe_ it? Why are you making me walk in it?"

"You know, for someone as tough as you're supposed to be, you do complain a lot."

"Siri!" Both Tris and Briar turned to see Peri dragging along a reluctant Raeg. "Siri." Peri smiled, only a little forced, as she wrenched her brother the last few inches to stand beside her.

"Hello," she smiled at Briar, after an awkward silence passed in which she expected Tris to do the introduction. "I'm Periann Gadrig, this is my brother Raeg." Briar looked her over admiringly as he took her hand, causing Tris to scowl. "I'm Rowan Farash, Tris's brother."

_Rowan?_

_Short notice, shut it._

"You're siblings?" Raeg asked.

"Of course. Don't you see the resemblance?" Briar asked, keeping his face innocent.

"We have to go," Tris growled. "I'll see you two after the break!"

"Happy Midwinter!" Peri chimed.

Briar looked her over again as he shook her hand again. "It was very nice to meet you."

_You think about doing anything with her and I will leave you naked in a lightning storm_, Tris threatened.

Briar snatched his hand away from Peri's, trying to smile and place his hand back at his side casually. Peri looked at him with an odd look, wondering at his reaction.

In both of their heads, Sandry and Daja roared with laughter.

Tris and Briar walked in silence through the snow to Tris's dorm.

"Wait here," Tris ordered unlocking the door and closing it firmly behind her before Briar could slip in.

_Tris, its freezing!_

_I'll only be a second!_

_I will pick this lock._

_Stop being such a baby! I'll only be a second._

Briar moved away from the building so he could huddle in the sunlight.

_If this is punishment for flirting with your friend, you're overreacting_.

When Tris walked into the common room most of the girls who shared this floor were huddled around the window. One of the common activities of distraction was to sit on the window seat and watch people go by— gossiping and speculating. Tris only realized they were looking at Briar when they turned to her, barraging her with questions.

"Who is _that_?"

"Is he with you?"

"Are you _going_ with him?"

Tris explained that he was her brother and the questions and interest got more specific, now that they knew he wasn't taken by their roommate. Briar, listening to them through her, looked up at the window, grinning, and waved. Some of the girls waved back, while some of them ducked away from the window, laughing at being caught. Tris took the distraction and rushed into the dorm, grabbing what she needed and hurrying back out.

_The last time I bring you here, I swear, Briar._

_Guess you should have brought what you needed to class in the first place, _he thought back smugly.


	16. Falling Apart

Briar had rented some rooms in a house outside the city walls, where Tris didn't have to hide her magic. She hadn't realized how much she missed using her power until she was able to again. Briar agreed to leave the house only when she would heat them up; he would be content to sleep like his plants if he had to live in a place like this all year round.

He left the day before school started up again, walking her back to her dorms before going to meet the Traders that she had arranged for him to travel to the border with. He had told her his misadventures on the way to the University, when he was traveling alone in the snow. Allowing him to try to get to Summersea in one piece by himself seemed too much like tempting the gods to come up with their worst.

The dorm was quiet when she walked in, only Grenda was in the room, and they exchanged pleasantries as Tris unpacked her bag, putting her clothes and books and combs away in their places. She had managed to completely brush her hair, undoing all of her braids and combing and washing her hair before redoing the power into them one night while she and Briar sat around after dinner. He whined about the static making his hair stand on end, but it was halfhearted— she just ignored him.

"Raeg stopped by yesterday for you," Grenda said, as Tris tugged out a book and sat on the bed.

"For what?"

Grenda shrugged. "He was wondering if you were back from your brother's yet, I think. I told him I would tell you to go see him when you were back."

Tris looked down at her book. Briar had read it earlier in the winter and had brought it for her. This would be the only free time she had before classes started again, when she would have no time to read something unrelated to class….

She put the book down on her bed, grabbed her coat and headed for the door. She hadn't seen Raeg all week.

-----

The next day, Tris stood with her arms wrapped around herself, in the cold courtyard outside Ravenfeather's classroom. She was sure that Ravenfeather would have come up with something with his free time over the break. Tris braced herself and opened the door. Her spectacles immediately fogged up, and she pulled them off irritably. She hated the disconcerting feeling of being instantly blind. The transition from the cold outside air to the heated classroom, and the resulting effect on her spectacles, continued to disorient her even after her months here in the colder weather. She resisted the urge to rub her temples, and instead busied herself with wiping the mist off the lenses. Peri smiled as she sat down beside her.

"When did you get back on campus?" Tris asked, putting her spectacles back on. She and Raeg had spent the evening with his friends in his dorm. Peri still hadn't returned to campus when they had walked her back to her dorm late.

"I stayed overnight and was escorted onto campus this morning," Peri said. "How was your Midwinter? When did your brother leave?"

"It was good. He left yesterday afternoon, so Raeg and I spent time together last night." Tris ignored the look on Peri's face. It was the same amused, speculating look Briar had given when he brought up Raeg over the break.

"Guess they don't have to be covered in lightning," he had said. Tris had refused to encourage him by asking what he meant, but it had had her wondering for the rest of the break.

_He isn't interested in me!_ she thought, biting her lip. _I'm not that person. People don't want to spend time with me... like that. I'm not like Briar's girls. I'm not like Sandry— who would have suitors even without her money. I'm not like Daja, who could always get a boy, and now can get the girls. I'm not even like Peri, who has charmed all of Raeg's friends. I'm just… not._

Today when she entered Ravenfeather's classroom she received no glares from him. She allowed herself a brief moment of smug relief. _He has finally given up. He will just leave me alone._ She had underestimated his ingenuity.

She listened to Peri while the rest of the students filtered in along with cold air and a few snowflakes that quickly melted on the stone floor. When the class was settled into their seats, Ravenfeather turned away from his desk, looking over the class with a smile. His eyes met Tris's and held there for an extra moment, the smile not fading in the slightest. Tris felt a flicker of unease. Something was familiar about that grin, but she just couldn't place it.

"I know your history classes are covering many mages who were influential in the past." There was a groan. The class hated history; they complained that the information was irrelevant and the lectures boring. Tris didn't understand them. She thought it was all very interesting.

"Yes, I understand," Ravenfeather said, placating his students. "But that's why we're not studying history. There are many very influential magic figures in the present. One such person is Niklaren Goldeye." Now Ravenfeather shot a quick glance at Tris, to gauge her reaction, but he didn't get anything. She had been waiting for this with a sick sense of expectancy every since she had let loose the reaction to his mention of Niko in the courtyard. _He would have to push this_, Tris thought, feeling her anger rise. _He can't just leave it alone._ Carefully neutral, she listened to Professor Ravenfeather talk about her teacher.

"A powerful mage, Goldeye was soon found to have a tremendous gift for the Sight aspects of mage craft, and so specialized in that exclusively,"

One of Raeg's friends put his hand up in the air, waving for Ravenfeather's attention.

"Yes, Eurey," the professor said, tiredly. "That is why he chose the name 'Goldeye'. Excellent observation." Eurey put his hand down, sheepishly. The class chuckled and Raeg elbowed his friend in the ribs affectionately. Caught off guard, Tris was bombarded with a quick question from the professor.

"Siri, when did Niklaren attend Lightsbridge?"

Tris quickly calculated Niko's age and figured what year he would have attended school. She opened her mouth to reply, but hesitated at the look on the professor's face. The smile was back, and Tris finally figured out what it reminded her of: it was the exact look Briar got when he was about to pull off one of his tricks.

One of the other student's piped up, "Did he go to school here? You never said that."

"Yes, he was a student here." Ravenfeather said, and Tris could see his irritation, even though his voice was still calm. "Before my time of course, because he left before his training was complete to a Master's level. Why do you think someone would do that, Siriana?"

"Change of scenery," she answered quickly. The class laughed, but she hadn't meant it as a joke. That was exactly the answer Niko had given her, in his dismissive 'I-don't-wish-to-speak-about-it' tone of voice, when she'd asked years ago. Ravenfeather, however glared at her just as if she was making a fool of him.

_It is you who is trying to push me into a corner_, she thought, angrily. _Don't you dare get all noble on me._

"Yes, very charming, Miss Farash. Although if you can't answer a question with any intelligence I suggest you leave the class," The room fell into an awkward silence, both out of confusion for Ravenfeather's out of character behaviour and in embarrassment for Tris. Raeg leaned forward in his chair, looking across the row and raised his eyebrow questioningly at Tris. She ignored him and the blush creeping on her cheeks.

"His talent for sight would become established only when he left the walls of Lightsbridge," Ravenfeather continued. "We teach you control and established magical practices. For someone with unique magic... This isn't the best place for that kind of power."

"I'm sure it's been established that we're all pretty common, Professor," Raeg said, an uncharacteristic bite in his voice. He looked from Tris to his mentor and back again. There was something off about the whole situation. He just couldn't figure out what it was.

-----

Tris fled the classroom. She managed to wait until the class was over, but just barely. Through a small archway, she ducked out of sight of the other students. She wanted nothing to do with their laughter or sympathy or curiosity, or whatever it was that they'd offer. Standing out of the way, she listened as their chatter and crunching footsteps faded away.

Instead of hurrying to her next class, Tris closed her eyes and leaned her head against the surprisingly warm bricks of the building. They held the sunlight that hit this side while it rose across the sky, and feeling that heat calmed Tris. The lightning along the tips of her hair that she hadn't realized was there faded quickly as she fell into the meditative breathing.

Suddenly, her calm state was disrupted, as usual, by voices. These, however were raised from the classroom around the corner, and not carried on the wind. Blatantly ignoring the noble voice in her head that told her it was rude to eavesdrop, Tris edged forward to hear the words.

"I am trying to protect you!" Ravenfeather's voice was frustrated as he addressed his student.

"From what? From _Siri_?" Raeg asked incredulously.

"She is not what she seems. How can you judge whether or not she is a danger? Raeg, believe me. Just believe me that it's important to stay away from her."

"You have no idea if there is anything really there or if you just think there is something sinister! You have no proof. You have no support. And yet you think everyone should just go along with you and ruin someone's life. You are just like my father! You—"

"Your father had very conclusive proof that you were a bastard, Raeg, so that's hardly a supportive argument."

The silence between them didn't last long this time. Raeg left the classroom in an angry burst of energy.

"Raeg, wait!" Ravenfeather called, but he was ignored. Tris listened to the last, cursing words of Ravenfeather— all self-directed— before she hurried away, already late for class. Strangely, she felt no satisfaction to this ending. _Sandry rubbing off on me_, she told herself, attempting a cross light-heartedness while she struggled with the guilty notion that her charade had pulled her lonely friend and his mentor apart.

-----

The wind was picking up in the city. The bitterly cold day getting colder as it bit through the layers everyone wore to chill the core of the people on the streets. High above them, the clouds churned in turmoil, getting closer to the ground as the storm grew until there was a solid grey ceiling swirling overhead. Veriv stood straight, defying the cold that would make a less determined man hunch over. He was in the same alley where he could see the wall the girl often went to.

He had dealt with his first problem, his first revenge. The lookout had certainly been aware that his death was on the way, which only made it sweeter for Veriv. He had lost his friends and family one by one until he was huddled, alone, in a rented apartment waiting for Truethought to find him. But a criminal with two-bit hired guards was much easier to reach than his next target.

Veriv looked up the wall and saw a familiar figure, alone. Tonight. He would be free tonight when the girl died.

-----

The guilt about the argument turned her stomach. Raeg had said so many times how important Ravenfeather was to him— he had gotten the abandoned boy into the school, he had kept him company over the summer, he had helped him get into the right classes— and now they were fighting because of her. Because she had to lie in order to get this schooling. Because of her stupid powers.

Because of her. She brushed a tear away angrily. She wished Briar was still here. She wished she was at home.

"Siri?"

Tris jumped, turning to face the intruder on her solitude. Periann looked at her with a concerned expression. "Are you all right? You seem very upset about something."

"No, I'm not," Tris replied, sharply. She closed her eyes, dismissing the other girl.

"Is there anything I can do?" Periann continued, coming closer. "Is there something you want me to get you or—"

"You are taking away my solitude without providing any company." Tris snapped. The wince and hurt expression Periann replied with made her feel guilty for her outburst, but, as usual, this just fueled her bad temper.

"Stop looking at me like that! You cannot expect everyone to just fall about themselves to make sure your feelings are never hurt. You are not that important."

"I do not expect that," Periann said weakly.

"That is exactly what you expect. You just have no backbone to demand it with," Tris continued, scathingly. "That's why you never stood up for your brother. That's why it's your fault he has been alone for years."

"It's not my fault!" Periann cried.

"Yes, it is!" Tris snapped. "You can whine and duck around it all you want, but there is a truth to this! You left your brother to face his exile alone. That was your choice, and no one else's! You had no say in what your father did, but _you_ could have been different, _you _could have been nice, Peri. You could have made him feel, for a second, that he wasn't _completely_ alone. _That_ is your fault." Peri stared at her friend, tears welling up in her eyes. She nodded at Tris's words and then turned and walked away in the direction of their next class. Tris pushed her head against the wall, feeling like a monster.

Suddenly knowing that she couldn't possibly go to class, Tris found her way up to the wall where she and Peri had spent much of their time. It really was too cold for this to be considered normal, but Tris didn't care. Looking out over the city as if her grey eyes were seeking some salvation or answers, Tris tried to understand how it had all gotten so out of her hands. Instead, all she got was more questions and her deep, aching homesickness forced her to turn and start down the steps off the wall.

A distinctly sinister feeling was carried to Tris on the wind, which had begun to pick up its pace as the sky swirled and darkened. Tris stopped dead, trying to catch more of the vision that had been brought to her, but it was gone in that fleeting impression. Tris was left without any clue other than a weight in her stomach and tightness in her throat. Something bad was coming.

And there was nothing she could do about it.


	17. The Beginning of the Storm

Truethought's new colleagues were not impressed by his planning. Close together in a small room, heated by the discussion as if to put the lie to the freezing temperatures outside, they listened as he outlined their roles.

"All you need to do is to cause mayhem— I have some blasting powder for you to use as you see fit. When I have what I am looking for, we will escape together. You can keep anything you've found."

"The school is practically a fortress. Not even the genarmed are allowed through. How do you think you'll get us in?" the leader of this little gang growled. A huge man with long red hair, he was considered someone to be feared on the poor streets of the city, and talked like he deserved respect because of it. His gang included eight other petty criminals who helped their leader collect the 'protection tax' from intimidated citizens, and who taught a lesson to those who refused to pay. They were perfect for what Veriv had in mind.

Truethought smiled a smile inspired by years in prison and the inner fears of countless people. "We'll walk in through the front door."

The silence lasted a full minute as the hardened men tried to discern whether or not this strange, frightening man was playing a joke on them.

"How on this gods-blasted earth do you think we'll manage that?" one of them said when it was clear the mage meant what he had said.

Truethought met the man's eyes. He stiffened and fell forward. His colleagues reacted quickly: one drew his sword, another saw to their fallen comrade. Prayers were muttered. The leader looked down at his man and back at the mage, impressed and fearful.

Truethought's smile grew. "Any questions?"

-----

Tris was pacing the main room of their dormitory. Glancing out the window, she frowned at the falling darkness. Most of the girls were back already, either studying or gossiping in the firelight. She couldn't make herself sit down and open her texts. She was too antsy. She recognized the feeling- a snowstorm was coming. A bad one, judging by how it had her on edge, and she tried to convince herself that the building blizzard was the only thing bothering her even as she replayed her fight with Periann over and over in her mind.

She walked over to the window again, looking out at the grounds, towards the wall where Periann had taken her.

The air warned her a minute before her eyes and ears did; it screamed in anger, compressed, and expanded violently.

The girls in the common room screamed as an explosion on the far side of campus split the night's quiet. The babble and questions quieted as everyone hurried to the window to gawk.

"Was it an accident? Is that a research building?" one of the girls asked, almost whispering, her eyes on the flames.

Tris, her ears and mind ringing, didn't answer. She threw open the window and let the breeze flow past her into the room. It was no research building: it was the entrance to the professor's meeting hall. Expecting to see some conflict, Tris was surprised to see no fight. The professors were lying on the ground, could only assume that they were dead. But how? She looked around at the panicking girls she had been living with for the last few months. What was she going to do with them? They had no chance against whatever enemy had declared war on Lightsbridge.

The door across the room burst open and some of the girls screamed again. Several were ready with incantations or summons of power, Tris included, before they realized that the intruders were some of the boys from the nearby dorm of non-magical students. Two of the girls rushed forward to hug their boyfriends as the others exploded with questions.

"What's happening?"

"What was that?"

"Did an experiment go wrong?"

"Is anyone hurt?"

"We have no idea." one of the boys answered. Tris recognized him from her biology class— Maret. "We heard the explosions and rushed over here." He glanced at his friends who were being hugged by their girls. "Should we wait for a professor?"

The door burst open again and Grenda rushed in as everyone jumped or shrieked.

"The professors have all been attacked!" she gasped, hand on her chest as she gasped for air.

Tris was the only one who wasn't stunned into silence. "All of them?" she asked quietly.

"They were all at the staff meeting, in the meeting hall," Grenda said. "I was helping with the papers and schedule, and there was an explosion and these men burst in and suddenly everyone was falling over. I don't know if they're dead or not… I have no idea."

"How did you get out?" one of the girls asked.

"I was near the far door."

"How many?" Tris asked.

Grenda thought about it, closing her eyes. "Nine… No, ten. There was a man near the back- he stayed in the doorway. A blonde man…" Grenda shivered.

Tris opened the window further, hoping to see anything that could help them while the others debated on what they should do next. _A blonde man stood in the silence of the meeting hall— the professors lying all around him. The door behind him was up in flames. He still looked sickly, and had hardly filled out, but he looked more alive. He chuckled to himself as he looked around the meeting hall at the bodies. The red haired man approached him with four of his men. _

_"Are you sure there are no more mages lurking about?" he asked the blonde man._

_Truethought shrugged. "Only the students, and I'm sure you can deal with some kids hiding in their dorms." His smile grew as the men drew their swords and hurried off into the university. _

Tris turned away from the window. "We have to get out of here," she ordered.

"What?" several of her dorm mates turned to stare at her.

"Like this?" one of them asked, tugging on her thin shirt.

"What's happening?"

"No questions!" Tris snapped. "There's no time. Move."

The vision hit Tris as a breeze moved through the window to the open stairwell door. _A group of men who didn't belong here. Tris knew what thieves, thugs and criminals looked like: she had seen enough of them. These men were not academics. They should not be here. One of the men— the red-haired giant— surveyed the room. "Grab what you want and then light it." He strode from the room with half the men while the other half rolled barrels into place…_

Another explosion ripped through the night air. Tris was the only one who didn't jump. She strode across the room, walking past the others in the shocked stillness. As she headed down the stairwell she heard them rush into movement, many of them thundering behind her as they followed her example.

Tris pushed open the door on the main level, holding it open for the girls behind her as she stepped out into the night. It was cold, with a biting wind that was picking up even as they waited for everyone to make it down the stairs. Tris blinked as a snowflake hit her spectacles and melted slowly on the glass. She looked up at the lit window of the dorm, seeing the snow falling as shadows against the light. The storm had arrived.

"Stay together," one of the boys ordered, closing the door behind the last girl.

"Where are we going to go?" Maret asked Tris quietly.

She closed her eyes and sorted through the images. "The dining hall," she said after a moment, opening her eyes to see that everyone was staring at her. "We can bar the door— and other dorms are heading that way."

"Let's go!" Maret ordered. "And keep quiet!"

"How does _she_ know?" one of the boys whispered.

Tris fell towards the back of the group as she talked with her siblings in her mind.

_Can they have killed all those mages?_ Sandry asked.

_There's only eight or nine of them and some boomdust— they can't have done…. _Daja said, trying to explain away the vision they had all seen.

_How could all these mages have let this happen?_ Tris asked.

_Tris, I'd be the first one to say you could handle mostly anything_, Briar said tensely. _But there is something going on here that may be out of your league. Don't try to pretend you didn't recognize that mage!_

They all thought of the vision, months ago, where Tris had felt the mage seek her through their connection. It was, undeniably, the same man. What powers did he have?

_Just stay with the group, please, Tris,_ Sandry said. _Try to get somewhere safe and don't let this mage anywhere near you! _

Tris sent an agreement and felt their limited relief. They wanted to be with her, where the trouble was. It didn't matter to any of them that Tris had dealt with her own problems before. She could be in danger and they were miles away from their sister: it was unbearable.

She took her barriers against the visions down, seeing the campus from all angles as she tried to piece together what was happening. She followed the group almost blindly so she could have warning of an attack. The snowflakes fell in larger numbers and the wind picked up.

-----

Periann climbed up to the wall again; to her sanctuary, the one place where she had always felt able to be herself. Not the dutiful daughter, not the beg-to-be-forgiven sister, not the good student or future wife or mage-in-the-making. Not even Periann. Just Peri. She had spent most of the day on the wall after she and Tris had fought— leaving a few times to pace around campus in order to get warm and to take her mind off the events of the day.

She had shared her sanctuary with the one friend she thought could understand just how she felt and although she was bidding the anger to rise up at this betrayal, she couldn't make it. Deep down, she felt she deserved it. She should have said something; she could have done something to help him. He was her brother. He deserved that much.

_I was afraid_, she admitted, collapsing against the stone wall, her vision blurred again by a fresh batch of tears. _I didn't want Father to get rid of me too._

She sniffed. It was getting dark. She had to get back. She rubbed her eyes lightly, making sure they wouldn't be red and swollen when she arrived back at her dormitory. Then she practiced a smile. Periann always smiled, even when Peri felt like screaming.

A boom, a crash ripped through the air of campus. Periann jumped, turning in the direction the sound had come from. She couldn't tell where the explosion had come from, and immediately tried to remember where her brother had said he would be. Siri was in her dorm… Surely it wasn't a dorm.

_Please don't let it be the dorms. Please don't let anyone be hurt. _

She hurried off the wall and into the alleyway that led towards her dormitory.

She heard a sound behind her. She turned around to see a man standing at the other end in a brown coat. Periann took a step back, pulling her own red coat tight across her chest. She was deciding whether to run or to say something to the blonde man who obviously didn't belong there when she looked into his eyes.

_She was on the doorstep of her own house, locked out because her father didn't have a use for her. He had never really loved her…. The explosion had killed Raeg and Siri— the people here she cared about were gone…. She would live her life, always, as what everyone else wanted her to be. She would _never_ get to make her own choices. She would_ never_ get to be who she wanted to be…._

Periann fell to the ground, unaware of everything but the visions in her head. Veriv stepped forward with a knock-out drug, making sure she was fully unconscious before he lifted the spell. There was only so long one could stay under the spell before it caused damage to their brain, especially if he was forcing it on them. The professors would be fine for a while longer. Truethought smirked a little— they would wake up and they would catch the looters that Veriv had promised to get out of the school. But by then Truethought would be gone— with the daughter of the man who made his career out of Veriv's arrest.

It would be a fitting revenge for her to die.


	18. In the Midst of the Storm

Chapter 18: In the Midst of the Storm

"Turn here," Tris ordered, for what seemed like the fifth time. No one asked any questions as they turned away from the most direct route to the dining hall. One of the boys stayed back, peeking around the corner to watch as the three men Tris was avoiding entered the alley a moment later.

"She was right," he murmured as he caught up with the group.

"Creepy," a girl whispered. Tris didn't bother to wince; it didn't matter. The attackers had split up into small groups which meant there were more people to avoid, but Tris knew this school and the maze-like quality of it was to their advantage. As long as she knew who they were avoiding, where they were, and in which direction they were moving there were dozens of ways she could avoid them and still be heading in the right direction. But to get the information she needed she was sorting through more visions than she had dealt with in all her time at Lightsbridge.

"_It's no good to get a skill and stop using it," _Lark always said._ "You always have to practice, or you'll forget it, and it'll be worse than starting over."_

Tris's headache reminded her that she had forgotten the lesson.

Tris stopped, standing in the snow with her hands over her eyes as she tried to ignore the throbbing. She was trying to figure out when a group of men would pass the walkway behind them, but it was nearly impossible to judge time at night in a blizzard.

"Siri?" Grenda whispered. She was hushed.

"All right," Tris said, looking behind her. "Run to the hall." Most of the group took off into the snow.

"What are you doing?" Grenda asked, her voice too loud. She had started to run to the hall when she looked back from a few feet to notice that Tris wasn't moving. Her cry got Maret's attention and he also stopped.

"Move it, Siri," Maret ordered, moving towards her just as the group came around the corner. Tris had seen that they didn't have time to get out of sight before the attackers entered the alley, but she had wanted her fellow students out of the way. She tried to put Maret and Grenda out of her mind— it changed nothing. She wasn't going to let these parasites follow them to the others. Maret cursed and pulled some magic into his hands. Tris started to idly drag her fingers through one of the small braids on the top of her head.

"What do we have here?" one of the men laughed, hitting the flat of his sword against his leg as they walked towards them.

"You might want to back up," Tris told Maret calmly. The snow at her feet rose into the air and began to circle.

The men thought she was talking to them and they laughed.

"We know what you little mage kids can do," the man in front grinned. "And it's not enough to make _us_ back up." The snow in the air whipped up, distracting the men. Tris smiled as she assembled the right winds. She unleashed it in its full force and it drove the snow into the men's faces, blinding them momentarily. They yelled out as the specks of ice, traveling too fast, hit their skin.

Tris looked up at the buildings above them where snow had been collecting on the slanted roofs for months. She grabbed winds above the roofs and directed them down quickly, throwing snow off of both roofs in a mass of white onto the oblivious men in the alley below.

Tris shielded herself as the snow exploded outward in a cold blanket, landing all around her. Her shield was a clear, sparking, circle surrounding her, holding the snow off as it piled up and everything went dark as the snow blocked out the little light that there was. Tris sent heat out into her shield so that it would melt its cover away. She waited in the darkness and the silence until it was water running off the invisible circle surrounding her. She drew the power back into herself and surveyed her work. The alley was filled above her head with heavy snow, enough to keep the attackers trapped for a while.

Tris shook off her boots. _I love snow._

"By all the gods…" she heard Maret whisper. She turned and walked past them without a glance. They hurried to catch up.

Some of their dormmates were waiting at the door and closed it behind them as Tris, Grenda and Maret hurried into the dining hall. A large number of the students had pushed their way into the long room, huddling together against the cold. Tris stood alone while surrounded by the mass of people. Several of the students were crying, and one carried on in hysterics that her friends tried unsuccessfully to subdue. The hall was dark and lit eerily with mage-lights held by several of the students.

Suddenly, Raeg had pushed his way past a group the stood near Tris; he grabbed her arm, holding too tightly. "Where is Periann?" he gasped.

"What?"

The wind crashed into the west wall, rattling the doors. More girls screamed at the sudden sound. Nothing of the attackers could be heard over the din. The sound was incredible, mere wind and snow creating a barrage of noises that the aggravated Raeg had to shout over in order to be heard. "You were with her this afternoon, neither of you showed up to class. Her dorm is all here and now she's not anywhere! Where is my sister?"

Tris's heart froze. No matter how rude, cranky and unfriendly Tris had been Periann had stuck by her. And now she was missing, out of the safety of this hall because of what Tris had said.

Tris's panic and fear turned to anger which had led to sunken pirate ships and had taken down killers. There was a kind of madness in this anger, the sort bred from helplessness and abandonment and frustration. That kind of madness didn't go away, even if the feelings that bred it had been loved out of a person.

The anger remained. It would always remain.

The look on Tris's face stopped Raeg from pushing her. She stood still for a moment, looking straight ahead. Raeg almost feared that his news had put her into shock. He blinked and stepped back in surprise as a burst of wind, inexplicably, blew by them from one of the high windows.

"Siri!" Raeg called. She didn't react at all— just stared blankly into the air.

Tris sorted through images the wind brought her. _One of the dorms, a later addition of wood, was up in flames. Strangers rummaged through the research in the senior classrooms. _

_Three of the Headmaster's assistants lay in their private dining room, staring at empty space with tortured eyes. A large man picked a gold ring off one of their hands. _

_A man had a slim body tossed over his shoulder; a slim brown-haired body in a crimson coat. The man carrying her had filled out slightly, as if he had managed to eat a few more meals, or maybe just some of better quality. His clothes were less ragged. His hair and skin was cleaner. But the look of madness, of darkness, of something without a name that whispers at the back of Tris's mind when she's alone in the dark; that look still burnt in his eyes. It was the man in the vision, the one who had seen her. _

_And he had Periann. _

Tris's head snapped up. She started towards the door.

Even though Peri had, somehow, ended up her closest friend outside her family and even though there was no question on whether or not Tris was going after her, it still hurt that she was giving up her dream of Lightsbridge.

Maybe if this went right…. No. She couldn't hope that somehow, anonymously, she could save Peri as Tris and return as Siriana. She couldn't hope that because she should know the ramifications of crushed hope by now.

She felt a deep sadness that this was how it would end, her dream to get a Lightsbridge license and become… normal. Though they'd all know, anyway, since her dormmates were suspicious, and Grenda and Maret would talk about the fight. There may not even be a Lightsbridge to attend after tonight, which seemed likely if the professors were actually dead.

And, regardless, she wasn't the kind of person to let others get hurt, no matter what they thought of her afterwards. But letting go of a dream: that made it so much harder to know that she would lose this life.

She had made it halfway across the crowded room when Raeg caught up with her.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked, matching her stride easily.

Tris didn't answer.

"Siri, where are you going?" Raeg hissed as she reached a door. Tris unlocked it, slipped through and closed the door on Raeg's face.

She walked quickly down the hall, listening to the door reopen and Raeg's hurried footsteps. _Please go, please leave. Raeg, just go away. I can't let you get hurt, I can't, I don't know when you became so important to me, but you have and you just need to go back inside the hall and stay safe until I can come back. _

"What do you think you are doing?" he hissed, catching her arm and twisting her around. "What are you doing?" he shook her arm, the frustration and worry and anger playing across his features. Tris didn't answer. She couldn't. How could she tell him, especially him, about everything? "Siri?!"

"I know where Periann is," Tris said, pulling her arm indignantly. "I have to hurry."

"You know? Let's go. Now."

"No. I'll go," Tris said sharply, turning and started back down the hallway. He was going to make this difficult and she was already bracing herself for what she had to do. He had to stay safe. She couldn't let him get hurt because of her mistake.

"What are you talking about?" Raeg asked, his long legs keeping pace with her easily. "I'm not letting you go alone in a storm with gods only know who is out there and all this trouble. I'm coming with you."

"Can't you take a hint?" Tris hissed, trying not to let her feelings show on her face. She didn't dare stop walking, not when Periann was with _him_, but Raeg was not leaving this building. No matter what she had to say to make sure he stayed behind, stayed safe. "Periann won't want to see you. You're not part of her family, Raeg. She hardly knows you. And she doesn't want to."

Tris knew it wasn't true. She knew Raeg, intellectually, knew it wasn't true. But to hear your fears, the fears you lived with after being abandoned by the only people you love, to hear those fears out loud…. His heart would believe it. Tris's heart bled for him. His footsteps faltered and he fell behind.

Tris made it to the door nearest the front hall. She wanted to be outside as short a time as possible. The storm had picked up even further. The snowflakes were tiny ice pellets in the wind and the temperature had dropped. Tris's head throbbed, both from the pressure of the storm and the extended filtering of her visions. Was the vision of Periann part of the past? Would she be too late? She prayed that it was in the future that he would be walking through the front gates, towards the city. If so, she would still have time.

She pulled up the hood on her coat and was tying it around her neck when she realized that someone was standing beside her. Jumping away with a gasp, it was only a moment before she realized that it was Raeg.

"What—" she tried to snap, but he cut her off.

"She is my sister. Even if I mean less than nothing to her, she is my sister and I will protect her. No matter what, because that's what family does. Even when we're apart and we've felt like we've lost each other. Even when we drive each other crazy and we want to kill each other. She's still my family. It doesn't matter if she doesn't want to be." Raeg looked at Tris, who stood still, listening to words that could have come from her heart. "It's not our place to push away our families, Siri. We love them regardless. So, I'm coming with you. And we're wasting no more time."

Tris didn't bother to find a response to that. There was none. Pushing the door open, fighting against the wind and the snow drifts was a chore that Raeg had to help her with. The door slammed shut behind them as they ran into the bitterly cold storm.

The wind blew the falling snow in horizontal sheets and swept up the layer building on the stones up into a stinging whirlwind. Raeg and Tris burst through one such whirlwind, running towards the main hall.

The multi-story, heavily decorated room had impressed Tris on her arrival. It seemed full of pompous purpose, hidden knowledge and a secret importance. Now, in the synchronous riot and over-whelming silence of the snowstorm, filled with a cold draft and drenched in silence, it was intimidating and frightening. The mage-lights that usually illuminated the ceiling's carving of the dragons were out, making the hidden serpents more sinister because Tris knew they were there, hiding in the darkness.

And across that room, made frightening by more than the night, a man paused to open the far door. This simple task was made difficult by the fact that he had Periann's unmoving body thrown across his shoulder.


	19. To Understand the Storm

Chapter 19: To Understand the Storm

The room was dark and the shadows playing across the floor from the flickering mage lights made it difficult to see, but both Raeg and Tris recognized the girl immediately. Tris felt a wave of relief. They weren't too late.

_Pay attention, Tris!_ Briar yelled at her. _He's still dangerous!_

"Peri!" Raeg yelled, jumping forward for his sister. Tris was behind him, her reflexes much slower. Before she could register what had happened, she ran into Raeg's back and they both fell to the floor. Tris looked at Raeg's petrified face. His eyes were open, but he didn't move as she pushed herself off him, and called his name.

"He's trapped inside his own mind," the stranger said, moving forward. Tris could only see a vague outline of the man and the lump on his shoulder that was her friend. He panted slightly for air at the end of his sentence. She stood slowly to face him.

"It's magic, of course. My own, unique talent. I don't believe that anyone has been able to do quite what I have done, or if they have, they have been killed off quite quickly for it. Now, child, you have a choice. You can stay out of my way, or I can trap you inside your worst nightmares, such as they are. Decide."

Tris didn't move. Looking at Raeg's frightened face, at Periann's limp form, she knew her choice. There was no choice to it. They were her friends. Somehow, she knew they would do the same for her, if it had been her this maniac was after. It was time for Tris to prove her friendship, and to drop Siri. She summoned a ball of energy, a feeble attempt at academic magic, but one that raised her spirits as she stood her ground. Her other hand reached up and undid one of her front braids—she couldn't do too much to him while he held her friend, but if she shocked him enough that he dropped her….

"One less distraction," the man said, stepping forward to meet her gaze.

Suddenly, it was hard to breathe. The room swam in and out of focus and Tris was back at Winding Circle, in the water, floating among the dead. A voice inside her mind was not quite hers, but not the fear-mage. A chilling mixture of both.

_**All those people, dead and under the water. Sinking. Unable to swim. Drowning is a horrible death, you know. How they must have fought against those chains. How they must have tried to find the air, only to be dragged under into those unforgiving depths.**_

_I did what I had to do_, Tris thought, fighting against the images her memory threw at her.

The hideous sounds, the sights of those helpless people. How could she have done that? A vision of Discipline came to her mind. Of course she knew why she had done it.

_I did it to protect my family_, she replied, her inner voice louder. _I did it to protect my home. I feel for the lives that were taken, but I will NOT regret my actions._

The image fled and Tris felt a mixture of relief, pride and accomplishment.

_Is that all he's got?_ she thought, victoriously. As quickly as she thought it, the room faded again.

She was standing in a courtyard. She couldn't understand why she felt… excited. Where was Periann? What was she doing here? All of a sudden she was drenched. What? She raised her hand to wipe off her eyes, this wasn't water… it was… sticky? She heard the laughter and knew who it was before she even had her eyes cleared enough to look up and see the boy who had asked her to meet him here. His friends would be here too, the ones who had been sickly sweet to her in a way she recognized as being as mean as any insults. She had put up with it for him….

"There, she's ready for your date now, Zam."

He laughed. "Not even that's enough to sweeten her."

Tris looked up at the sky and opened her power. The clouds, all together, dropped the load they were carrying over the city. Soon enough the ground was running with mud and the honey was dripping off the ends of her clothes, which were stain repellent and Sandry-made. She told herself that she had got honey in her eyes as she wiped the tears away.

_**You'll be alone forever**__,_ the treacherous voice whispered. This fear didn't make Tris upset. It made her angry.

_I don't care! I don't want them! They can rot, and so can you._

This time the vision came without a break. Truethought had never met someone who had come out of the fears so many times. He had never met someone who he had to concentrate so hard on. Usually he found a fear they were stuck in quickly, and he could concentrate on other things. He put the girl down— his muscles were not strong enough after so many years in that cell— and walked towards this redhead who still had the strength to stand. He didn't notice the boy turn his head and moan as Veriv lost his hold on the other spells.

Veriv could see only tiny glimpses of the things that consumed her energy— he was too tired by now to enter her mind to watch them— but something in the flickers drew his attention. There was something he was missing, something he ought to know about this young mage. Why did her power have the sting of lightning? Why did he feel like she should be familiar to him? As if he had caught a glimpse of her power on the wind….

He shook away his half-formed thoughts and concentrated on the blank grey eyes.

Tris saw the faces of the people who had found out about her powers. The Dedicates at the temples after the hailstorm, the academics on the road who saw the medallion, other mages who learned of her wind-scrying, the villagers and nobles in Namorn. All of them. There were so many who feared and loathed her because of what she was born as, because of a part of herself she never chose.

_**You don't really belong. You don't belong anywhere. They look at you and they fear you. They look at you and they hate you.**_

All the times that she was mocked, cringed from, ignored and insulted came back to her in a rush. She felt weighed down by the overwhelming loneliness that had been part of her entire life.

_My powers have-_

_**Your powers have isolated you. They have kept you alone.**_

_My powers have saved people,_ Tris forced out in a mere whisper. _My powers have saved lives and livelihoods and money. They have kept my friends safe. They stopped an epidemic and a forest fire, a drought_, her inner voice grew stronger and stronger as she gained her confidence. The fearful images faded. _Any price I have paid for my powers has been paid back to me!_ she proclaimed. She was physically and mentally exhausted, and her victory made her dizzy with relief.

Truethought wasn't done in her memories. She should have realized it sooner.

_**Any**_ _**price?**_

She saw her family house. Details were missing, things she hadn't noted as a child, but still, the amount she remembered about this old place surprised her. Why? She had thought about it every day since the day she was taken away so many years ago. The faces of her family; all those cruel, stupid people who wouldn't hold on to her. Who she wasn't important enough for. She saw Raeg. Raeg who had gone through the same hurt, the same feelings. _**Because of this girl, this Periann.**_

That didn't sound right, but Tris couldn't remember why.

_**You don't even want to be here. You fought with her just today. She abandoned him! Just like they all abandoned you when you were a child. When you were in need of someone's love and no one stepped forward. That's who this girl is. She's your cousins and your aunts. She's your mother. Is that who you are fighting to save? **_

_She meant none of it. She was a child. It wasn't her fault. _Tris could hear the disjointed, slurred quality of her response. She knew she wasn't supposed to be drinking… She was a mage! So why did she sound drunk?

_**That didn't stop it from hurting, did it? When you were alone, crying silently. Sitting upstairs in that drafty bedroom, not even daring to light a candle, for fear they'd know you were listening in. You still feel that pain.**_

She did. The individual needles that each word would poke into her heart. The overwhelming sense of inadequacy.

_**She did this.**_

_Not to me._

_**She did this.**_

_ Not to-_

_**She did this.**_

_ Me?_

The memories overtook Tris, dragging her into their depths. Her cousins, taunting her after she was left in her Uncle's house. The steep hill to the market. The same looks and threats and whispers that always came before the moves. The shame of being on another relative's doorstep. The look on her parents' faces when they gave her away.

He wouldn't even meet her eyes. Her mother looked out the window the entire time, out into the courtyard where there was a cherry tree in bloom. Her father had talked to the Dedicate about the strangeness and the embarrassment and the inconvenience of his daughter and then he had said that he really didn't want to see her again. She had been sitting right there. They hadn't looked at her before they left. The last time she had seen either of them….

The cherry tree was in bloom, or was it apple-blossoms? Briar will know….

Briar.

Sandry.

Daja.

The connection was easily opened— right to open. The situation carried to them in a heartbeat of thought and they were behind her, around her, supporting her like she knew her family would.

Truethought couldn't sense this; this wasn't part of Tris's mind, this connection. They were separate, but together. One, but wholly different beings. But they gave her the strength. Sandry's caring and Briar's common sense and Daja's serenity. They gave her the strength to face all of this and more. Her mind was her sanctuary. He did not belong there.

_**I can understand the storm inside of you,**_ Veriv thought, sure of victory.

"You really_ can't_." Tris threw all of her pain and fear and anger out of herself, through the spell, through the connection Veriv had formed that first time they had ever sensed each other, in that vision. The wind was _her_ domain. This was her strength. That wind picked up and exploded around her as she released the power she had been holding in check for months as she had been pretending to be someone else. Just like her parents would have wanted. The wind swirled violently and the glass windows shattered as more wind rushed in to her.

Raeg had managed to push himself up on all fours, fighting the queasiness. When the room exploded he gathered his strength and threw himself across the room, huddling over the unconscious figure of his little sister, protecting her from the harsh air and the debris. He closed his eyes. It only lasted a moment. As the wind died he looked up. The stranger who had tried to kidnap his sister was on the ground, facing him. His eyes were open and staring, but his chest was moving. Trapped in his own nightmares. Raeg found it ironically appropriate. He looked up at Siri, standing in the center of the storm untouched, panting. She had a smile on her face that made Raeg want to laugh: pure adrenaline rush and as smug as a cat.

For the first time in a very long time, Tris felt unburdened. All of the fear, the weights of the past were lifted off her shoulders and she was free. It didn't own her anymore. The moment of freedom stretched and lasted forever, even as it only lasted a moment. Tris felt her power-core and it was empty.

A voice in her head scolded, sounding exactly like Rosethorn, as the fours' personal scolds always did. _You've gone and drained yourself and you'd better get ready to fall now._

Tris fell, but was surprised to be caught and lowered to the stone.

She heard someone call out from outside the hall, but she was too tired to do anything about it.

"Ravenfeather!" Raeg yelled from above her. "Over here!" Hands tapped her face and he sounded frantic as he called to her. Sort of.

"It's Tris," she tried to say, but ended up muttering.

"What?"

Tris opened her eyes to meet Raeg's gaze straight on. "My name is Tris."


	20. Clear Skies

The last chapter... I want to thank everyone who has made it this far. You guys have been awesome, I really enjoyed all of your reviews and I wanted to thank all the anonymous reviewers that I couldn't respond to. Another big thanks to my betas; Sweet Sassy Sarah, LunaSphere, Katiebug, and Etariel. You guys were the best betas I could have possibly asked for.

* * *

Raeg sat by Periann's bedside, having flatly and repeatedly refused a bed. He only had a few cuts from the shattered glass and some bruises from falling over. The healers had finally brought him a chair and made him promise not to leave it until they were sure there were no side-effects from that madman's power. They had also refused to answer any questions about Siri— Tris— and since he had had to choose between being with Peri when she woke up and searching the school for Si— Tris, dammit— he had taken the chair.

The infirmary was filled with noise. Everyone who had been placed under the fear-magic was awake now and crammed into this room. The lanterns that had been lit flickered madly and bounced shadows around as healers rushed in front of them. Raeg rubbed the hand that wasn't clutching his sister's across his eyes. He had a massive headache. Well, no wonder; in one night he had been hit by a powerful spell, had passed out, and had been knocked around by a blast of what had to be weather-magic.

Which had him thinking about Tris. Ravenfeather had reached them just as Tris passed out. With a panicked look that Raeg had never seen on him before, he asked Raeg if he was all right, checked both girls and summoned some help. Waiting for the healers to come, Ravenfeather had looked at Tris and laughed, of all things. Seeing the expression on Raeg's face had just made him laugh harder.

"Short for Trisana, no doubt," Ravenfeather had murmured as the infirmary staff rushed into the room and everything clicked into place in Raeg's mind.

"Raeg?"

"Peri!" Raeg's eyes snapped open and he leaned over the bed, looking at his little sister. He smiled. "You're all right. You're all right?"

"Yes. My throat hurts. What happened?"

"You were kidnapped—"

"Oh! I remember! Who was that? Where is he?" Peri looked around at all the other people. "What happened to everyone else?"

"There were explosions, and the mage who grabbed you had some kind of mind magic— no one is really sure, yet."

"Where is he?"

"Don't worry. Siri— Tris got him with his own power—he was still out when the professors got him."

"Tris?"

"Periann!" The voice rang out over the weather and human commotion; the fear clear in its tone.

"Father?" Peri asked weakly, raising herself up on her elbows. The man pushing his way towards the bed looked sort of like her father, in the way that you could tell that siblings were related. Instead of neat, oiled hair this man looked as if he had just climbed out of bed. Instead of his impeccable uniform, he wore a coat over what looked like a night gown. Instead of his neutral, guarded face this stranger wore a look of fear and anxious relief. He reached the bedside.

"Peri," he gasped, pulling her into a hug.

"Father?" she gasped, hugging him back awkwardly.

Raeg attempted to edge out of the room before he was involved in the scene in any way. His luck completely failed him, and he was noticed by one of the healers, a strict young man with a carrying voice.

"Sit!" the healer commanded. "You have had massive shocks acting the hero as you were, and I want you seated now! Or you're going into a bed!" Another healer called for something from across the hall.

"Now!" the healer shot at Raeg as he rushed off to help.

Raeg looked over at his sister and father, who were both looking at him. He didn't dare meet his father's gaze, but didn't move away, either.

"Raeg—"

"Father," Periann interrupted. "Don't say a word. I mean it." Both her father and brother stared at her as she continued in a voice full of authority. "He deserves so much more than what you've done to him, and he just saved my life and he should get a minute without your criticisms. So just don't."

"Periann—" Their father started again, but she shook her head violently, wincing and clasped a hand to her forehead. Raeg moved forward, grabbing a cold water bowl off the table behind his chair and wringing out the cloth.

"Lay down, you silly girl," he commanded, keeping his voice light. "I don't need you to protect me. I'm fine."

"Liar," Periann whispered, but she was worn out and her strength was gone. After less than a minute she was asleep.

"Can you stay until she wakes up, or should I?" Raeg asked, turning to put the cloth back into the bowl without looking at his father, who stood watching him from the end of the bed.

"Raeg." There was no solidity to the voice, but a gentleness that Raeg had never heard with his name from that mouth. Despite himself, he met the gaze of older eyes that matched his own. There was a moment that stretched, everything unsaid, every hurt, every regret jammed up into it so that neither of them could speak to break it. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, his father broke the stare, looking at the bed into his daughter's face.

"I can stay," he said, the old authoritarianism seeping back, despite his appearance.

Raeg stood to leave without a word, squeezing his sister's hand one more time before he turned away.

"Raeg," he turned again to look at his father, his eyebrows raised in question. "Dinner, this Sunsday," his father continued. "She would enjoy you being there." His eyes didn't falter, and Raeg thought— hoped— that maybe it wasn't just about her. But that hope was a little too fragile in the angry face of the past.

"I might be busy,he replied, instead, turning and walking away.

"'Might'?" his father asked, his single voice sounding lost in the noise of the infirmary. Raeg didn't turn this time. But when he had snuck out of that hall –the healer's back was turned- and was in his dorm, in the bed that had belonged to him longer than any other, he allowed the hope to bloom, just a little.

"I might."

-----

Tris woke slowly. Sounds came first, whispers in her ears that didn't connect. The warmth came next, blankets across her waist and legs, sunlight on her right side. After that she realized that her eyes were closed and that she was lying in a bed, the sounds became words from people talking softly at a small distance. Tris kept her eyes closed. She didn't want to think about any of it.

Plus, her head was pounding as hard as it had when she had tried to stop the tides nine years ago. She wasn't enjoying the feeling. Tris felt for her center and wrinkled her nose in distaste. She would be doing no blasting for a while, unless she wanted to go into the store of magic in her hair, which she was smart enough to realize was a bad idea.

She felt movement in the air beside her, heard a creak of furniture by her ear. She realized that the voices had stopped.

"Just a minute with her," the voice was soft, obviously whispered by whoever had sat down beside the bed. She kept her eyes shut, berating herself for being immature and unrealistic, but refusing to open her eyes and look at Ravenfeather just the same.

"I had a talented student. I thought that there was something off about her. She didn't seem like the other first years; she knew too much, had too much in her eyes." He paused. Tris wasn't sure if he was searching for words or if he was waiting for a reaction, but he carried on without waiting for her to acknowledge him. "I think that I reacted badly. Instead of supporting this student, I isolated her. Instead of helping, I hindered. And I'm afraid that my actions may have had a role to play in this… in this giant mess. For that, I am very sorry. Truly sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Tris said, her voice harsh from sleep. Ravenfeather chuckled. She opened her eyes and sat up, not looking over at him, but not hiding anymore. She was so sick of hiding.

"You were right, you know. I'm not who I said I was."

To her surprise, Ravenfeather nodded. "I witnessed the last little bit of your weather magic and heard you tell Raeg your name," he explained. "I know enough about the events of the last few years to have heard your name." There was silence and Tris waited for the fear, the anger, the jealousy to start.

"Can I see that amulet now?" Ravenfeather asked.

"What?"

"It's been bothering me for months," he admitted. "And since the secret's out, I thought I might be able to look at it."

Tris wordlessly slipped the necklace over her head and handed it to him, staring as he examined it. His grin grew as he turned it over in his hands.

He didn't care about who she was, or what she could do.

The door opened and the headmaster, made older by the events of the night, and a new, very familiar figure.

She took a deep breath and looked up, meeting the black eyes of Niklaren Goldeye, who was staring down at her with something that resembled fury. Tris didn't say anything. When Niko looked like this, the four shut up and let him yell.

_Better you than me_, her foster-siblings sent as one.

Ravenfeather stood up to greet the new arrivals.

"Here she is, Niklaren, relatively unharmed, as I promised," the headmaster said.

"Thank you, Threidin. May we have a moment?" Niko said, his voice cold. Ravenfeather dangled the amulet in front of her.

"You can keep it," Tris said.

He grinned, delighted at the thought of a new toy. "I will see you in class," he said, following the headmaster from the room.

She knew that, no matter what Ravenfeather believed, no matter how little he cared about who she really was, she wasn't staying. She quickly wiped away a tear before Niko could notice. This whole place was… a dream. And Trisana Chandler didn't indulge in dreams.

Niko sat down quietly in the vacated chair and smoothed out his pants. Tris watched him, worried as he took time over the details. He was thinking, she knew. When he got very finicky she knew he was trying to find a way to talk to her. Like when she had asked an awkward question growing up. She knew to wait, to not push him into speaking his mind. The silence stretched.

"I was on my way to Summersea, barely two weeks away from Discipline, when I got the vision of you being attacked by that… mage," Niko spat out the word. Tris winced. "Can you begin to imagine, Trisana, the amount of fear I carried on the journey here? I could not tell how far it was in the future, I didn't know if you were all right. And when I rode up to the school and saw the destruction…."

"I am so sorry, Niko," Tris said, looking at her lap. "I was stupid. I never should have come here, it's—" She looked up, out the window, anywhere but Niko's eyes. If she looked there she would see that he had known all along and she didn't want to see that reflected with love and sympathy. She couldn't take it. "It's just not going to work. I can't be someone I'm not." She shrugged, as if her heart wasn't breaking.

"What do you want to do?"

She wanted to go back two days and redo the entire thing, keep Peri from going out. She wanted to be friends, maybe more, with Raeg. She wanted to be Siri, actually be Siri, to have that life and that history and that soul. She wanted to not have had this gift. But right now, most of all, when she knew she could have none of that, she wanted her family.

"I want to go back to Summersea," she said, looking out the window. "I want to go home."

-----

It didn't take long to pack. Niko quickly acquired a servant's help and an extra horse. Tris managed to get all of her possessions without once running into Raeg, Periann or any of their friends.

_Coward_, she called herself, because she couldn't take the changes she would see in their faces.

_Its better this way_, she lied.

The stable hand helped pack everything onto their packhorse and Tris and Niko, rode out of the stables. City workers were already rebuilding the damaged areas, increasing the mosaic charm of the campus. Tris stopped her horse, looking back at the buildings one last time. Niko stopped his horse beside her, waiting until she was done with her goodbye.

A wind blew over the buildings and ruffled her coat and Niko's hair.

_"You should have seen her, Peri,"_ Tris squeezed her eyes shut as Raeg's voice came to her. She didn't want this, she didn't want it to happen again. She didn't want to know. She didn't want-

_"She was amazing."_

Tris gasped, staring straight ahead. The breeze brought her nothing else, but it didn't need to. She was amazing. Amazing. Tris was.

Tris looked over at Niko, and looking at the slightly satisfied smile on his face, she saw that he knew she wasn't going anywhere. Slightly annoyed— she thought he could have saved her the packing— she raised an eyebrow in question.

"This school was never right for me, you know," Niko said. "But it's doing wonders for you, and… maybe it's doing what I couldn't." He smiled in a self-conscious way as his thoughts turned inward.

Tris, without thinking too hard about it, it was easier when her thoughts were muddled with pleasure from overhearing Raeg's praise, said, "You are the best teacher I will ever have, Niko."

He turned away, rubbing his hand over his eyes. After a moment he turned back towards his student, smoothing his hands along his now more salt-than-pepper mustache. He smiled. "And you are the best student I will ever have, dear Trisana. Thank you. There's more out there in the world for you, I know that."

"Do you see it?"

He smiled his mage-smile, looking into her eyes. "Every day," he said, like a promise.

-----

They rode back to the dorms and were unpacking when Peri found them.

"What are you doing?" she asked, looking in panic at the bags.

"Peri—"

"No!" She strode over to the nearest bag and started taking the objects out of it. "You aren't running away. You are my friend, and you are not going to disappear without a word!"

"Peri—" Tris tried again. Niko was watching them silently, a smile trying to not flicker over his features. Peri hadn't noticed him.

"You were going to just _leave_? Leave the school, and leave me and leave_ Raeg_? Without even a goodbye? Well, I won't allow it!"

"What's going on?" Raeg stood at the door, surveying the room.

"I'm—"

"She's leaving!"

"What!?"

Niko's chuckle escaped him, distracting them from their anger. "I'm going to leave you to this, Trisana. I will have a rented house in town for a week, so I'm sure to see you again before classes begin. It was very nice to meet you two," he said, nodding to the embarrassed Peri and Raeg. "Hopefully we'll have a chance to be introduced at a later date." Tris nodded and he slipped out of the room.

"You're _not_ leaving?" Raeg asked. Peri seemed too mortified to think of the words.

Tris shrugged. "If you had let me get a word in edgewise you would have known sooner. I can't pretend to be someone I'm not, but that doesn't mean I can't stay here…" Peri squeaked, her embarrassment forgotten. She hugged Tris quickly and turned back to the bag she was unpacking, pulling out the items with more care.

"I'm glad," Raeg said, stepping closer.

Tris smiled, looking away. "Me too."

"'Tris'?" Peri didn't stop unpacking as she asked the question Tris had been fearing. Tris took a deep breath. There was a lot of explaining to do but none of it really seemed to matter.

They were still here. They had come to find her. _That _was what mattered.

-----

They had a week off while the school was put back in order. Raeg and Peri were angry that she had almost left without a word, but they forgave her quickly enough. Their questions lasted a majority of the night as she told them most of what she had been hiding. Most of it… Some things still couldn't be aired so soon after the fresh pain that fear-mage had caused, but when Raeg took her hand while she told them of the reactions of the southern mages to her power, she thought that it wouldn't be too long before the old wounds were healed again.

Without being forced into anyone's company by classes, Tris avoided who she wanted to avoid. Ironically, Peri was the only girl left in her dorm. The rest had been pulled from classes by their parents after news of the night's events had spread. Peri didn't mention what she had said to her father to stop him from taking her home, but it was another example of the newfound backbone she hadn't known she possessed.

Tris stayed in Peri's room, away from the rumours that were spreading through the school. Her solitude lasted only one night. Raeg showed up the next day with Dominik, Tridian, and Eurey in tow. Without a mention of her sudden name change, they made a mess of the noble girls' common room and made bets on whether or not spring midterms would be cancelled. The next day, Grenda and Maret found her and joined in with their group. Around dinner, Thierry and Amnie arrived with plates of food stolen from the unemployed dining hall. Raeg grinned at her from across the room as they laughed at one of Tridian's stories and Tris smiled back. Life at Lightsbridge couldn't be better.

_Well_, Tris thought, following her friends up the stairs to their wall, her skirts bunched in her fists. _Not all of it. _

There were stares and whispers when they went out into the school. Peri made faces and Eurey made rude jokes, and Raeg actually took her hand and it didn't matter so much. It wasn't so much their acceptance, which she had always had at Winding Circle, but her reaction to all her fears being laid before her. The pain was still there, but it was dulled by the expression of it. There were things that mattered more. Tris made it up the stairs and walked towards the view, entranced.

_I won't be Siri anymore. Never again._ Her friends stood along the wall beside her, quicker up the stairs than she could be, especially after her time in the infirmary. Grenda stood with Anmie, laughing as Tridian, Maret, and Dominik playfully kept Eurey away from the wall's ledges. Peri leaned against the wall, looking out over her father's city, less bitter than sweet now that Raeg had come home for his first family dinner.

She felt him move up behind her, the smirk becoming a smile as he tried to surprise her. She looked over her shoulder at him.

"Don't be so smug," Raeg muttered, caught in the act. "I'll get you one day."

"Not likely," Tris scoffed, thinking of her visions and hearing, as well as an ex-thief foster-brother. She leaned on the wall to look up at him.

"It's coming!" one of the boys down the wall yelled. Everyone gripped the wall, bracing themselves. Along with a flurry of wet snow, the wind blew towards them. Raeg reached out quickly, grabbing onto her and pulling her into a hug as the wind hit, freezing cold and nearly strong enough to take them all away.

"The unsuspected can always happen," Raeg whispered into her ear, holding tight as another gust of wind blew along the wall, sending their friends into shrieks of laughter.

Tris agreed wholeheartedly, leaning into Raeg's shoulder. Like lightning from clear skies, the unsuspected flashed down, changing everything. Tris's grey eyes looked up into the laughing face of the one who had seen her at the worst time of her life, and would still hold her up in the wind. This, Tris knew, as he leaned in for a kiss, was what she had been waiting for.

* * *

-The End-


End file.
